Relationships How To Make Her Yours Attract Women Easily

Relationships How To Make Her Yours Attract Women Easily Image
You have a woman that your eyes have been set on for some time now. The only thing is, no matter what you seem to do, you just cannot get her to notice you. At least, not in the way that you want her to. You are not looking to become her best friend. You want to make her yours. You want her to be your girl.

SO, HOW DO YOU GO ABOUT IT?

Knowing HOW TO ATTRACT WOMEN easily starts with having the right mindset. You have to have the confidence in yourself to be able to approach women in a way that shows that you are not just there to be another guy friend. Otherwise, that's exactly what you will become.

To make her yours, you have to flirt with her and create attraction. Don't be afraid to let it slip that you think she is HOT. Don't tip toe around the subject, hoping not to offend her. One of the reasons that so many men seem to struggle with getting the girl is that they are really timid in their approach.

INSTEAD OF JUST BEING NATURAL AND SHOWING THEIR INTEREST, THEY TRY TO PLAY IT SAFE. Look, if you are going to do this, you are not going to have much success with women, at all!

Men that seem to be naturally good at attracting women are not afraid to show their interest. It's just that they know how to do this without coming off like a timid little puppy dog. A puppy dog may be cute on a postcard, but it's not going to get you in bed with her anytime soon.

YOU HAVE TO CREATE ATTRACTION AND YOU SHOULD DO THIS FROM THE ONSET. THAT IS HOW YOU ARE GOING TO MAKE HER YOURS AND ATTRACT WOMEN EASILY.

Go to:


ATTRACT WOMEN EASILY Learn how to get the girl and get DATING TIPS FOR MEN

Suggested free e-books to read:

Alphahot1 - Question How Do Afcs Become Afcs
Reef Styles - How To Attract Online Women In Easy Way


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Dating Rules By New Moon

Dating Rules By New Moon Image
Men who are in their 30s and 40s now could only wish to have had a movie like in their day. As you listen to all the girls and women in the theater swoon every time Edward Cullen or Wolf Boy utter a word, it's obvious that knows what it takes to get the girls.

That said, here are some dating rules that MICK LASALLE gathered from watching NEW MOON DATING RULE #1, MAKE YOUR COMPLIMENTS FREAKY

The usual, "you have beautiful eyes" just doesn't cut it with the ladies anymore; now you need to say things that will freak her out like, "You give me everything by breathing" a la Edward Cullen.

NEW MOON DATING RULE #2, THE WAY YOU COMPLIMENT IS IMPORTANT

Never dish a compliment and make it seem like you want one in return. If you can manage to compliment a woman and make it seem that "hey, everyone should know about your awesomeness, because it just IS," you're in.

NEW MOON DATING RULE #3, DEVELOP YOUR LOOK

Being good looking is obviously important, but being "Edward" looking is just as important, so try to jazz up your look with a hint of "different." Just keep in mind that the white face look doesn't work for everyone.

NEW MOON DATING RULE #4, PUMP SOME IRON

I think that Wolf Boy Jacob proved that by buffing himself up for New Moon. He even almost managed to seduce Bella with his awesome new muscles.

NEW MOON DATING RULE #5, BE A BAD ASS WITH A TRIPPY SIDE

Your bad ass side will attract them and your trippy side will leave them wanting to fix whatever they think is wrong with you. Women like to fix things.

NEW MOON DATING RULE #6, BE HER PROTECTOR

Everyone in New Moon is trying to protect Bella and keeps telling her so over and over again. This pleases Bella and this also makes all the women watching the movie want to be Bella. So promise to protect her and she's yours forever.

NEW MOON DATING RULE #7, SHAKE EVERY TIME YOU KISS HER

This seems to work wonders for Edward. Every time he kisses her, his body convulses and although one would think he was experiencing a case of PE, he's actually just afraid that he can't control himself from killing her. And that's what you need to do. Whenever you kiss her, act like you want to rip off her clothes, but you won't because you're a gentleman.

Suggested free e-books to read:

Shawn Nelson - The Dating Resource Report
Carlos Xuma - The Dating Black Book

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Self Help Products How To Find The Best Ones For You

Self Help Products How To Find The Best Ones For You Image
There is no doubt that in 2011, SELF HELP PRODUCTS are needed now, more than ever. The stresses of modern life are taking their toll on everyone, especially with the global financial crisis, the high cost of living, unemployment and the uncertainty of the future. People are stressed out, depressed, anxious and unhappy, as well as broke, lonely and afraid. For some people it has become a matter of survival... a life and death struggle.

It is undisputed that every single person on this planet is only here for a short time (relatively speaking). But I do believe that we are here for a purpose and we are here to reach our highest human potential (no, I'm not religious and this doesn't really have anything to do with religion). It is all about feeling happy, fulfilled and peaceful inside, while really enjoying life to the fullest with the people you love.

"Self help products" offer a vast number of very important tools that will help the average person not only cope with life, but also massively improve their life and develop success. And in 2011, it has become all the more easier to gain these self improvement tools, especially with the explosion of online products. The challenge is to find products that work and that will help you improve your life.

However, while there are many products available that really do work to improve all facets of your life, they only work if you put in the time and effort required to make it effective. Don't expect any magic bullets or miracles, because they don't exist.

My aim with this website, is to tell you about the best SELF HELP PRODUCTS that I have found and either used personally to great success myself, or products that come from very reputable "self help gurus" that have been around for a long time. The most important strategy for self improvement in my life has been meditation, so be sure to read my holosync review to find out my secret weapon for achieving very deep states of meditation.

It is important to know that many products that are sold online, are worthless, and are a waste of your time and money. I'll certainly do my best to tell you about the ones that I believe in, but do a little research yourself before pulling out your credit card.

Click Here To Boost Your Self Esteem And Confidence In 7 Days

So please feel free to browse around this site and read some of the articles that catch your eye. Or better still; sign up on our mailing list below to receive our regular bi-weekly newsletter with great content, tips and product recommendations. Also receive a FREE 26 page report entitled, "How To Become Your Best Self... While Fulfilling All Your Dreams In The Process." Just enter your name and email below and we'll see you on the other side.

Here's to your new life.

Best Wishes,

Andrew Johnson




Suggested free e-books to read:

Adam Harrison - How To Tap The Incredible Secret Powers Of Your Mind
C Kellogg - Self Help Book That Helps You


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Internet Dating Site

Internet Dating Site Image
The recently married Congressman from New York, Anthony Weiner, appears to have bungled the dispatch of a direct message on Twitter, instead sending a very public tweet. The reply, sent to an unnamed female, linked to a photo of a thin white male's groinal area, in brief-style underwear, while in a state of arousal.

Rep. Anthony Weiner (D-NY 9') finds himself in a late night online pickle.

This evening a photo surfaced on Congressman Weiner's yfrog account and in his verified Twitter timeline of a man in his underwear with an erection. The photo was reportedly sent to a woman on Twitter. We've protected her name and her account, which was at one time verified to be active but has since been deleted after the photo in question was deleted...

...Coincidentally, the rest of the photos in the congressman's alleged yfrog account were also deleted around 11 p.m. eastern...

...Weiner, who married Hillary Clinton's longtime assistant, Huma Abedin, last year, has been ing about hockey this evening. Confusion reigns online as puzzled Weiner followers wonder what occurred to Weiner's timeline.

The photo, stored at Weiner's alleged yfrog account, is connected to his verified Twitter account. Were his yfrog and Twitter accounts hacked as well?

I'm guessing that's the weiner story Weiner is sticking with.

Remember that a Republican -- Rep. Christopher Lee (NY-26) -- resigned after a similar, less lewd, photo was published on an Internet dating site.

But Democrats operate under a different set of rules than the rest of us.

* Rep. Gerry Studds continued serving in Congress even after being censured for having sex with a 17-year old Congressional page.

* Rep. Barney Frank continues to serve in Congress even after a series of sex-related scandals including the discovery that a gay prostitution ring was operating out of his home.

* And so on, "ad infinitum".

Anthony's Weiner needs to resign from Congress immediately. It's the ethical thing to do. He won't, of course, because he's a shameless, power-hungry, Marxist hack like his mentor Chuck Schumer. He won't resign because it "would" be the ethical thing to do.

"LINKED BY: American Power and Memeorandum. Thanks!"

Suggested free e-books to read:

Brian Caniglia - Online Dating Secrets
David Jones - The Art Of Internet Dating
Dating Insider - Guide To Internet Dating


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Stephen Nash Seminar

Stephen Nash Seminar Image
Over the weekend, I had the privilege to attend Stephen Nash's "On Being Naturally Attractive To Women" seminar held in New York. It was a diverse group of fellas, but they all wanted to know one thing - how to be smooth, and charismatic with a sense of purpose.

I think some of the guys caught on faster than others, although all learned valuable lessons, and felt a shift in reality from being there.

DAY 1


Stephen started by talking about what things are attractive to women; namely, security, autonomy, and masculinity. He went through exercises to help guys focus on what they really want out of life, which helps them gain a better understanding on why someone would want to be around them.

He then moved onto his Circle of Autonomy.

The circle of autonomy is made up of (if I can remember them all) Finances, Hobbies, Social Life, Image (Fashion, Style), Career, Health, Family, and Spirituality. Stephen was saying that with all of these in balance, creates an autonomous male, which is the most attractive of all males. (Alpha Male) Because he has his life together, is not needy, and exudes a level of masculinity reserved only for those who are on this path.

Stephen went into what your purpose is and what that details. Finding you're purpose is one of the most important steps in the process of becoming naturally attractive.

We then had the pleasure of hearing from Michael Jancz who is an expert of the David Deida line of work. His book Way of the Superior Man which I recommend everyone pickup immediately was the basis of Michael's segment. Although some of what he said was a little "newage", most of it was good information that really helps you put in perspective the feminine and how it relates to us.

DAY 2


Stephen detailed social skills. Engage, Hook, Connect in every detail imaginable. I learned alot of great techinques in this section, such as "Baiting" in which you simply and subtly, spur new conversations by dropping experiences in.

Eg. Her: Do you love New York or what?

You: Yeah I love New York, way different than the river rafting town outside Seattle. Not better, just different

Her: Oh, what town?

Baiting is the best way to lead conversations, as it stops you from being "needy" and always asking questions.

Stephen then lead us into his social circle techniques.

Leading is most important when it comes to social circle "game". Coming up with new activities, inviting friends, and making it as fun as possible puts you in the position of the "leader", which makes you attractive and which lets you meet tonnes of women if done right. Stephen stepped the guys through this process, and what to really look for when you find a new group of women. Eg. the "gatekeepers".

Then we had a fashion and style segment in which Jonathon Hudson, former GM of Charisma Arts.

Jonathon broke down fashion archetypes and what fits, what colors work on different guys and what to really look for when you're buying clothes. Jonathon stayed around and fueled conversations as the day progressed.

We then had three beautiful women come in to give their first impressions of the guys. It was interesting to hear their opinions as most of them really didn't think to badly of some of the guys I thought would be social rejects. Perhaps, they were just being nice.

Either way, every guy got up and got drilled in front of the whole seminar. It was awesome. Many guys got a tonne out of this, and it ended up being one of the nicest unforeseen highlights of the seminar.

After the first impressions and general vibe from the women's section of the seminar, Stephen closed with a motivation speech about how to get these skills implemented in life, and really find what they want with women and dating.

Overall, many of the guys came up to me after and commented that they wish they took this seminar before others they had previously. I didn't meet one guy that regretted it, and one even said he was so excited about his new view on life he couldn't wait to get started!

Great seminar, with a great attendance.

For those who didn't make it, you should check out Stephen's program called "Natural Attraction, it goes over alot of the same stuff as the seminar, and is formatted into a 7 day "personal coaching" style audio program.

Suggested free e-books to read:

Real Social Dynamics - Amsterdam Seminar Notes
David Deangelo - Stephen Interview Special Report

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Make Your Date Special With Teen Dating Tips

Make Your Date Special With Teen Dating Tips Image
Teen dating is in vogue. Everybody wants to know the success ratio of this dating. Most of the people choose the wrong path and get the rejection on the first step. It doesn't mean that they are not capable for dating. Here are few teen dating tips which give you 100% success:

DINNER If a girl is ready for the dinner, it means she has found something interesting in you and ready to proceed further. Now, it is your responsibility to loose the opportunity or win it. Nothing can beat the best location and delicious food. Girls always like elegant location and fantastic atmosphere. Always choose a hotel or restaurant where she can feel comfortable with you.

CONVERSATION It is the only way you can share your feelings with your partner. According to dating tips, you should talk about your common interest. It will help to increase the conversation. Always appreciate the hobbies, like, work etc. of other person.

GIFT Your start or conversation in teen dating doesn't matter. If you didn't get success to win his/her heart then nothing can beat a sweet gift. Always try to make a best end while leaving him/her. A beautiful gift can make him/her realize how much you care for him/her.

Teen dating is in vogue. Everybody wants to know the success ratio of this dating. Most of the people choose the wrong path and get the rejection on the first step. It doesn't mean that they are not capable for dating. Here are few teen dating tips which give you 100% success:

Dinner - If a girl is ready for the dinner, it means she has found something interesting in you and ready to proceed further. Now, it is your responsibility to loose the opportunity or win it. Nothing can beat the best location and delicious food. Girls always like elegant location and fantastic atmosphere. Always choose a hotel or restaurant where she can feel comfortable with you.

Conversation - It is the only way you can share your feelings with your partner. According to dating tips, you should talk about your common interest. It will help to increase the conversation. Always appreciate the hobbies, like, work etc. of other person.

Gift - Your start or conversation in teen dating doesn't matter. If you didn't get success to win his/her heart then nothing can beat a sweet gift. Always try to make a best end while leaving him/her. A beautiful gift can make him/her realize how much you care for him/her.

Suggested free e-books to read:

David Deangelo - Double Your Dating Special Holiday Report
David Deangelo - Double Your Dating Mastery With Women And Dating

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How I Meet Girls On Facebook Consistently

How I Meet Girls On Facebook Consistently Cover
I've been wanting to get down to the essentials of what it takes to MEET WOMEN ON FACEBOOK. I've spent the last year really hitting the social networking sites hard using a trial and error approach. There are many ways that work, but this method works the most consistent. I get the majority of my dates this way now because it's easy and time efficient.

HOW TO MEET GIRLS ON FACEBOOK: THE FRIEND BUILDING PHASE

Before you can start PIMPING your Facebook account, you should understand a few things first. You should realize that this technique takes advantage of your current friends and acquaintances. I've actually found this scouting technique works really well with friends OF friends that you've met once or twice. I dip into the best friends pool sometimes, but using this technique exclusively on your friends limits its potential and scalability.

You need to go out an actively build your friends on Facebook. Everyone you meet in a decent passing conversation you say, "You gotta be on Facebook right? Ok then, whats your last name, I'll add ya!" Then you add them. This is just like building rapport with women. You want to build on commonalities, so they remember you when you add them and you can use that social equity when you get them to set you up. People will accept 99% of the time. You want to do this with women, especially an ugly or not your type of woman, but not men (straight men). Men are protective over women in their network, even if they don't know them well. Chances are that the guy is trying to seduce her anyway, so why would he want you as competition? The only guys of seen this work on are the really uber-social, that are friends with EVERYONE and never hook up. =)

HOW TO MEET GIRLS ON FACEBOOK: THE RAPPORT BUILDING PHASE

Once you've added these people, try and remain decent friends. About a week after adding them as friends, comment on a photo, post on their wall, saying stuff like, "What did you do in Thailand?" or "Nice beach. You guys must of RIPPED those waves up!" Just don't come across as creepy or annoying. Just play it relaxed and sociable.

HOW TO MEET GIRLS ON FACEBOOK: THE SEARCHING PHASE

Now you've built some sort of rapport with your friends. Make sure you keep it relaxed and friendly. People love this. Next, this could take some time. Go through your friends Photos, usually not Photo Albums. Go through Photos were they are tagged. This usually means they are in a social environment and you have a better chance of finding women quicker. You need to do a little investigative work, but you should determine quickly if the women that you see with her are married/single/in a relationship. Once you have determined that

HOW TO MEET GIRLS ON FACEBOOK: THE MESSAGING CONNECTING

This step is crucial, but fairly simple. Message (don't write on their wall) your friend this, "[Friends Name], you gotta set me up with that [NAME] girl! Tell her you've got a cool friend to set her up with". They would say, "Yeah, I can. Come around and meet her." This is fine, but if you want her phone number quicker. "Just get her to check out my profile and ask her if she doesn't mind you giving me her number to call her!" This is a softening request that I've never had not work. Sometimes your friend would say, "Oh, shes taken." or "Oh, every guy asks about her." Then say, "Thats fine, you gotta set me up with someone though. Your friends are cute". She will say, "Have a look at some photos and let me know" or typically, "What about my friend [NAME]?" You can be honest, say, "Oh yeah. Nice. Get me her number." or, "I'm more of a [QUALITY (hair color, personality type)] type of guy."

IMPORTANT: If you already have this friends number, you don't have to message them on Facebook. You can just text them.

Once you have her number. I usually text first. Say, "This is [NAME], [FRIEND]'s friend. Is it true what they say about [QUALITY]?

Then flirt away before meeting up.

HOW TO MEET GIRLS ON FACEBOOK: CONCLUSION

That's how to meet women on Facebook.

This is one of the best ways to meet women, because you already have a level of social proof, and you can see what women look like so it's better than a blind date with minimal effort. I also don't think it's needy or supplicating by asking to be setup with women. If anything, it shows how masculine you truly are because of the mindset of the "prize". Women already know men want women, by ignoring that fact you make yourself look feminine. The trick is to follow this with power and focus. Women should be with you and by setting you up with her friend, she's doing her friend a favor.

THIS METHOD HOWEVER DOESN'T ALLEVIATE A BAD FACEBOOK PROFILE. IF YOU ENJOYED THIS POST, OR MAYBE EVEN PROBABLY WANTED MORE INFORMATION BUT DIDN'T GET IT, YOU SHOULD CHECK OUT DAVE M'S INSIDE INTERNET DATING (MY REVIEW). IT'S GOT EVERYTHING YOU'LL EVER WANT TO KNOW ABOUT MEETING WOMEN ONLINE, FROM ONLINE DATING SITES TO FACEBOOK. CHECK IT OUT.

Suggested free e-books to read:

Steve Carter - How To Attract Girls In 3 Important Steps
Scot Mckay - How To Meet Women On Twitter
Linda Martz - How To Give A Foot Massage

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Boyfriend Kinky Request

Boyfriend Kinky Request Cover

BOYFRIENDS KINKY REQUEST

I consider myself pretty open minded and am willing to do most anything in bed. Until now.

My boyfriend and I were having our fantasy talk during foreplay like we usually do and after telling him one of my fantasies, which was pretty run of the mill (slam me up against the wall, bite my back, ravage me), he came up with a doozy.

He told me that he has always fantasized about sticking his finger in my butt and pulling out a turd and then eating it. I'm going to puke just writing that down.

I find this to be pretty disgusting and have started looking at him in a different light. I don't even want to have sex with him anymore. He knows something's up, and I'm pretty sure he realized that he crossed the line here.

So now, what do I do? Do I dump him? I'm pretty sure we can't go back from here.

DARA


Dara, if you feel like you cannot let this go, then you already have your answer. It's not easy to stay with a partner you feel is asking you to compromise your sexual boundaries.

If letting him eat your poop is something you're simply not into, and can't even bear to imagine, then yeah, it's time to bid him farewell.

The thing is, he felt safe enough with you to share this very private fantasy, so do your best not to share this intimate detail with anyone. I'm certain he thought that you wouldn't react the way you did. Otherwise he would not have told you.

"GOING DOWN ON WOMEN

I want to go down on my girlfriend, but I'm not really sure what to do down there. My friend told me to do the alphabet against her clitoris, but that sounds pretty stupid.

Can you give me some tips?

WILL


To start, the alphabet idea is a great one. It's only stupid if you actually say the letters out loud while you're doing it.

Here are some tips to help you make it a great experience for her:

* Use your tongue to lick the clitoris and get it wet.
* Every now and then, stop licking and use your fingers to rub it.
* When you get your tongue back to the clitoris, insert one or two fingers insider her and make a "come here" motion to ensure you hit her G-spot

Also, feel free to take breaks every so often and kiss her navel, her inner thighs, and let her clitoris throb for your mouth.

"

Suggested free e-books to read:

Martha Kempner - Body Image And Self Esteem
Joseph Matthews - The Boyfriend Is Not An Obstacle

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Boys Do You Know What Girls Like

Boys Do You Know What Girls Like Image

So boys ready for a date but do you know what girls like:

* If you really like a girl don't laugh at her or make fun of her.

* If you want to talk with her go ahead and just say like hey, hi, hello then later say so how are you doing?

* First become friends to know each other well before u ask her to go out.

* Once you know her well ask her to be girlfriend.

* Call her once a week and try to find out her interest.

* Wait about two weeks before you ask her for a sweet hug.

* Wait for a couple of months before you ask her for a kiss on her cheek.

* After a year ask her to give a kiss on the LIPS!



Suggested free e-books to read:

Anonymous - A Young Girl Diary
Christian Godefroy - How To Control Your Brain At Will

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Blind Date Be Prepared To Meet A Stranger

Blind Date Be Prepared To Meet A Stranger Image
Concept of blind date is in fashion. More and more people want to enjoy this exciting experience. Today, we brought important tips for people who love to attempt blind date once.

Leader - Either you are boy or girl; you should behave like a leader and lead your date as per your comfort. Mostly, people do not feel comfortable in front of unknown person. Please do not loose your confidence and show your attitude.

Be aware - Please keep in minds that it is a blind date. You have no idea with whom you are going to spend the day or night.

Show off - Blind date is not bad at all. It is a nice technique to know unknown person as well. It boosts your confidence and you may get perfect partner for life-time. So, do not try to showoff while enjoying date.

Eye contact - It shows your confidence and attitude. You should not break eye contact while talking with your partner.

Location - Do not go too far from your actual place and be in contact with close friend through texts or calls while enjoying blind date.

Suggested free e-books to read:

Ken Ward - Mind Change Techniques To Keep The Change
Chris Jackson - Ultimate Ejaculation Mastery

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Boyfriend A Wittol

Boyfriend A Wittol Cover
Dating Q&A - Boyfriends a wittol

IS MY BOYFRIEND A WITTOL?

While we were at a party, my boyfriend saw as another man kissed me, and that I liked it. I thought he would be furious, but instead he took me home that night and we had the best sex ever.

Is it possible that it turned him on?

BASSY


It obviously did, considering he took you home and gave it to you good. Did you talk about what happened? Did he make any mention of it?

Although it would be great to sweep this under the rug and act like it never happened, it's possible that your boyfriend has sexual fantasies that he wants to communicate to you and this is the perfect opportunity to find out what they are.

"SINGLE FOR LIFE?

I've been single my whole life. I've been on dates, but have never had a girlfriend. Is there really someone out there for me? I feel like trying to find someone at 40 is impossible.

DAN


I know that things might seem hopeless, but you really have to stop feeling sorry for yourself. Wallowing in self-pity will ensure that you'll never find someone. No one wants to be around a miserable person.

Instead, take care of yourself by working out, eating right, and having a social life. If you want to find someone you have to actively seek them out. They're not going to knock on your door.

So get yourself together, adapt a positive attitude and go find her.

"

Suggested free e-books to read:

Tony Horton - Bring It
Joseph Matthews - The Boyfriend Is Not An Obstacle

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Christian Dating Find Your Perfect Match

Christian Dating Find Your Perfect Match Image
Christian dating service are quiet different as comparison to other dating services. Basically, this service is related more about the needs and requirements of Christian's boys and girls. Even, websites that provide the services also follow the rule, regulation and principles of Christian's community. Gone are days when dating was considered as safe and easy option to find a suitable partner. In current market scenario, Christian dating is getting more and more popularity. Not only Christians but also people from different religion and society are joining the world of Christian dating.

Are you also looking for Christian dating? If yes, then do not forget to consider online service. These services are also accepted by church ministry. So, more and more singles Christian are joining this world to find the perfect partner. These sites help people to meet with each other and start a relationship. Generally, most of the relationships convert into marriages. Before entering in this world, it is important for every person to checkout the rules and regulations of online dating. Please also consider the choice why you want to join dating world.

Suggested free e-books to read:

Shawn Nelson - The Dating Resource Report
Brad P - Planning The Perfect Date

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How Impact Makes Connection

How Impact Makes Connection Image
So now you understand that making a deep and solid connection with a woman is something that will help a GREAT deal.

You now need to learn how to do it.

A lot of men think that this can only be done by showing their own vulnerable side and that they have to open up and reveal their deepest darkest secrets. But like I said in Part 1. This is completely unnecessary. If you do this too early on, the woman might feel that you're a bit of "a big girls blouse" or that you're someone who wants to talk about themselves too much or worse somebody who needs some kind of pity from her. If you open up too much with the woman and keep talking about your own secrets/problems/worries etc then she might just sit back and listen and start to take the role of a psychiatrist. (Remember, woman are usually very good listeners, and are fairly happy to listen to peoples problems) Unfortunately, if this happens then it will not necessarily result in obtaining your desired goal of "creating a deep and solid connection"

In order to make deep connection with a woman,the first thing you must do is make impact.

Say you ask her what she does for a living. This of course will create no impact at all with her. In fact, she might internally be thinking:

"Oh no! I ve been asked this a thousand times before by guys, and I don't want to sit here for 20 minutes discussing my job"

But if you make impact with your RESPONSE to her job, then you will be taking the first and important step in to making a deep connection.

When a woman tells you what she does for a living, you are presented with 2 choices.

The first choice is to talk about her job and as a result keep the conversation on the surface level, consequently presenting your self as yet another man who she will not remember for long. (And yet another pointless chit chat/small talk conversation that will get lost forever in the world of "pointless chit chats")

Or you can take the 2nd choice, which is to respond with something that most people do not ask her. Something, which will suddenly create a hairline shift in her perception of you. Something which will intrigue her and which will draw her in to the interaction with you more. Something that will create IMPACT!

Lets begin with what you should NOT respond with, so that you do NOT keep the interaction on the surface level.

The 4 most common and pointless questions men use to respond to a girls answer in relation to what she does for a living.

"How long have you done that for?'

"Do you like it?"

"Where are you based/who do you work for?"

"How did you get in to that?"

Not only are these responses common and as a result she will automatically feel bored. But they serve to do nothing more than keeping the conversation on "small talk" terms.

Think about the people whom you have chitchat or small talk with. They are people who you are friendly with but not really close to, and you remain on chitchat basis with them because you have and they have no real intention of getting that close to one another. This can range from certain distant family members, people down the pub, or people you work with.

Another way to describe "chit chat/small talk" is 'POLITE DETACHMENT"

So pose your self this question


"Will polite detachment help me make deep connection with a women?"

Answer "NO"


A better way to respond to her response in relation to what she does work wise in order to create impact and which will lead on to deep connection would be the following responses:

1. REALLY? IS THAT SOMETHING YOU WANTED TO DO FROM A YOUNG AGE?

This particular response always seems to make a small but enough impact on the woman, and she often shows great delight in answering this question. It takes her away from the mundane every day functions of her job, and allows her to remember her dreams and ambitions she once held. This will obviously lead to a far deeper level in the interaction.

2. DOES YOUR JOB MAKE YOU FULFILLED, I MEAN, DO YOU WAKE UP WITH A SMILE ON YOUR FACE BEFORE YOU GO TO WORK?

Again, this is a thoughtful question, and shows her that you are interested to learn how she feels about her life and her work.

3. "Really, I thought you did something more in the arts/creative/drama (pick something which is opposite to what ever line of work she does)

This will make her curious and usually women reflect on this kind of response, as they sometimes internally question themselves i.e "Do I have other talents that I'm not using?"

4. TELL ME THREE THINGS THAT YOU NEED IN ORDER TO BE SUCCESSFUL AT YOUR JOB

This not only sets her a little task, but it also gets her to reveal certain characteristics about her self and/or characteristics that she would like to possess.

These are just a few examples of what you can do in response to a potentially dull answer.

There are many many more, but the point here is that you must make impact in your response in order to create connection.

As long as your manner is one of sincerity and you are not shows any signs of being antagonistic, then the woman will respond well.

In the third part of this blog, we will look at where you can take it from there, and how you can carry on making deeper connections without asking her too many questions.

Suggested free e-books to read:

Tyler Durden - Complete Articles Collection
Juggler - How To Meet And Connect With Women

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Yahoo Personals For A Potential Boyfriend Using The Free Wi-fi

Yahoo Personals For A Potential Boyfriend Using The Free Wi-fi Image
BEYOND THE SMILES, THE SEATTLE FREEZE IS ON

Peter Dunne, 42, searches Yahoo Personals for a potential boyfriend using the free Wi-Fi at University Zoka coffee shop. After living in San Francisco and Los Angeles, Dunne finds Seattle a social wasteland. "There's no sexual energy here at all," he says. Seattle is "a city of the mind... a city of geeks. People here... they totally blow you off. And these are good friends, right? They just don't call you. It's unbelievable."

SOON AFTER SETTLING in Seattle, nearly everyone acquires a version of the"people-here-are-sooo-nice"story. There's the comic after-you-no-please-after-you traffic merge. And the fellow who held the elevator door when you were still 20 feet away. Then that time some lady offered you change for the meter. And, of course, the classic jaywalker's tale:

"You're perched on the edge of the sidewalk, gazing across the street, when suddenly a car stops in the middle of the road. The man behind the steering wheel smiles and gestures for you to cross in front of him."

At her first Space City Mixer event, Lisa Garcia, 36, of Bellevue admits she's nervous: "I'm a little overwhelmed by all the people here." Her friend Paul Spitalny, 46, has already been to three mixers. The social club has 8,000 members, mostly transplants who are looking to forge friendships - or get a date.

Is this a trick? Like when your older brother would act like he was slowing down to let you in the car and then just as you reached for the handle, he'd lurch forward and send you sprawling?

"No, the nice man in the sedan seems sincere and shows no sign of lurching. Four other cars are now stopped behind him, all waiting for you to cross. And not a one honks."

Those who move to Seattle also have another kind of story. But you don't broadcast this one. You keep it to yourself or whisper it to other transplants. It goes something like this:

"You're talking to a co-worker/someone at a party/fill in the blank. In any other town, this person looks like someone with whom you might be friends. Potential friend asks, "So what are you up to this weekend?"

"Oh, I don't have any plans yet. I just moved to Seattle and don't really know anybody..."

You try not to look desperate.

Friend-to-be smiles and, for a brief, shining moment you think to yourself: Finally, someone is going to ask me to do something. Invite me to a party. Happy hour. Brunch with the girls. It'll be just like "Sex and the City." She'll be Charlotte; you'll be Carrie!

You feel a chill coming on. Still smiling, Friend-Not-On-Your-Life politely excuses herself, "Well, have a nice weekend then."

"Ouch.

You've just experienced the infamous Seattle Freeze. It's the flip side of Seattle Nice. Welcome to Seattle... Now please go away.

Seattle's long been described in contradictory terms. The weather: Is it mild or dreary or mildly dreary? The politics: Progressive yet torpid. Progressing toward torpor? The attitude: Tolerant - of all like-minded people.

But the dichotomy most fundamental to our collective civic character is this: Polite but distant. "HAVE A NICE DAY. SOMEWHERE ELSE."

We're the ideal seatmate on an airplane. We slide in, exchange a smile and a succinct pleasantry, then leave you be for the rest of the flight. Alaska Airlines should capitalize on this with ads that promise: "Uninterrupted service from Seattle - and we mean it."

Seattle is like that popular girl in high school. The one who gets your vote for homecoming queen because she always smiles and says hello. But she doesn't know your name and doesn't care to. She doesn't want to be your friend. She's just being "nice."

Eli Katz, a native of Cherry Hill, N.J., met that girl when she moved to Seattle almost three years ago. At first, she thought, that Seattle, she's sooo "nice". She smiles" nicely" at me on the street. She's always telling me to have a "nice" day.

Katz, 27, is an aspiring actress who's never had trouble making friends in the other cities where she's lived - not in London, New York or Philadelphia. She has a boisterous, throaty laugh that sounds like an invitation. On a sit-com, she'd play the wacky gal pal.

But in Seattle, it was cold shoulder after cold shoulder. She was working as a waitress with dozens of people her age, but it took six months before one of them invited her along when they went out after work.

Jodi O'Brien, chairwoman of the sociology department at Seattle University, applies sociological jargon to the interactions she sees every day. Seattle's "social script," she says, can ultimately lead to "alienation" and "isolation. Politeness is a poor substitute for intimacy and genuine friendship."

"It seems nobody really wants to let you in," she says. "They'll say, 'Oh yeah, yeah, I'll get your number' - but you know that's going nowhere."

Now, after penetrating a circle of friends made up mostly of fellow transplants, Katz observes that Seattle's rules of engagement are opposite those of her suburban Jersey hometown. In fact, they're opposite those of any place she's ever heard of, where the freeze generally applies in passing situations, like on buses or elevators, but familiarity breeds intimacy.

"Here, it's so weird, people are so nice in these passing situations, but beyond that there's a wall," she says.

Sociology professor Jodi O'Brien has a name for it: "the phenomenon of the plastic smile."

Raised in Salt Lake City and Zurich, O'Brien came to Seattle 20 years ago for graduate school and is now chairwoman of the sociology department at Seattle University.

"At the university, where people are hired from all over, this is a pretty standard conversation," O'Brien says. "Seattleites are often seen as having this veneer of pleasantness but being hard to come to know."

It can even be a faculty-retention problem, she says. When new faculty arrive - especially if they're young and single - they imagine they'll soon be part of some urban tribe. They've been duped by the movie "Singles." Instead, the Seattle Freeze sends them packing.

SO WHY DOES Seattle seem to have what self-help books would call a fear of intimacy?

Or, as O'Brien more kindly puts it, a tendency to "cocoon."

One theory points to the cloistering effect of cloudy skies. Another has it that the Seattle Nice/Ice phenomenon is rooted in a historic intersection of Nordic-Asian reserve. It may be the influence of weekend mountain men or the influx of socially disinclined tech workers. It could be a trapping of mid-sized citydom - small enough to manage on your own but too big to care about your neighbors.

Or perhaps it's all of the above: some confluence of factors that has created a perfect storm of antisociality.

Some element of our antisocial streak, at least, seems to go back to the frontier days, when the prevailing ethic was: We're in this together, but I wish you'd go away.

"There's always been this sense that every person you add diminishes the wonderfulness of this place by something," intones Bainbridge Island author Fred Moody, who explores our cultural history in his most recent book, "Seattle and the Demons of Ambition. As soon as you get here, there's a tendency to want to pull up the drawbridges."

That instinct had its most famous voice in the late Seattle newspaper columnist Emmett Watson and his spoof society called "Lesser Seattle." For those who aren't familiar, in the 1980s and '90s, Watson responded to the flood of newcomers, especially Californians, whom he accused of bidding up housing prices and yuppifying his precious town, with cranky columns that exaggerated Seattle's shortcomings in an effort to "Keep the Bastards Out!"

Stacia Cammarano, 11, left, and Francesca Reeves, 9, both of Seattle, listen as Dawn DeGroot of Mrs. DeGroot's Wallingford Charm School demonstrates proper tea-party etiquette. She instructs that it's impolite to discuss religion, politics or the war in general social settings. Good manners, she says, she can teach. But getting beyond mere social graces is harder here.

The word Seattle, according to Watson, was Indian for "stay away from here." If you were to have told him that Seattleites are a bunch of cold fish, he would have urged: Spread the word!

When you ask longtime Seattleites about the Freeze, you may get blank stares (the wall of ice goes up when faced with any perceived slight on their fair city) or a little passive-aggressiveness: "Well, the people who think that must "not" be from Seattle." ("Not from Seattle" is the "Your mama" of Northwestern insults.) But most are, as you'd expect, quite nice about it.

Especially Wallingford's only known etiquette consultant. "No, I wouldn't say we're friendly, not exactly," admits Dawn DeGroot, who was born in Tacoma but has lived in Seattle for 17 years.

At Mrs. DeGroot's Wallingford Charm School, children learn which forks to use when, and that one must always pass the salt and pepper together. Polite she can teach: "Being polite is a social grace that doesn't need to go any farther," she says.

As for friendly, that's tougher: "Being friendly is that next step, offering an invitation, and we do fall short on that," she says. "I think not wanting to show your cards is a bit of a Northwest thing. But that doesn't mean we aren't good people... Just the other day I was loading my car at Costco and a nice man said to me, 'May I take your cart back for you?' "

That's just the kind of reason Seattle was named third-most-polite city in the country by Marjabelle Young Stewart, author of more than a dozen etiquette books with titles such as "White Gloves and Party Manners."

Stewart - Mrs. Stewart, if you please - puts together her list of polite cities each year based on letters and calls she gets from tourists and business travelers, who are apparently tickled to find we don't scream or honk at them. They especially appreciate our smiley wait staff and cheerful salespeople. We're not the home of Nordstrom for nothing.

"Take a bow, Seattle, you really have something to be proud of," says Mrs. Stewart.

And when the Seattle Freeze is explained, her esteem for our city, if anything, seems to rise.

"I think it's good to be polite but reserved in your emotions," she says. "It's quite lovely to say no thank you, very kindly, and be on your way. I'd like to encourage a little more of that kind of calmness."

WHILE RESERVE may come in handy when you've got on white gloves, it can make for a rather stultifying social scene, as Gabriel Tevrizian found when he moved here 15 years ago from Buenos Aires.

Now 40, Tevrizian recalls that for the first time in his life, he knew what it meant to be lonely.

After 15 years in Seattle, Gabriel Tevrizian of Buenos Aires has, for the most part, adapted to the local social climate. He's learned to smile politely rather than reach for a hug and toned his dressing way down; he no longer wears red pants to work. "You don't want to be perceived as flamboyant here," he says.

"There's no such thing as that in Argentina," he says. "There are people around you constantly. They come over and hang out and then they hang out some more.

"People here don't ever just hang out - there's no time for that - but those are the times you really get to know people."

Any attempt to socialize begins to feel like too much effort, he says. "You have to try to get together 10 times before someone doesn't cancel."

Trying to develop a friendship in Seattle, you can feel a bit like Bill Murray in "Groundhog Day." Like with each encounter you have to start from scratch, back to the surface niceties.

Take the dog park. Pam Tate and her Pomeranian-Schipperke mix Jett see the same people each week at the Magnuson Park off-leash area. As the dogs sniff each other, their owners chitchat and trade compliments on each other's sniff-worthy dogs. But each time, at the end of the conversation, "I know the dog's name, but not the owners'. How sad is that?"

And as Tate, 36, quickly learned, when you actually make an effort, you risk coming off as pushy. When she arrived from Orange County, potential-friend types would say, "Hey, let's do something sometime." And she thought they meant it. She'd try to actually set something up. "People would seem shocked; I was seen as aggressive for asking people to do a specific thing at a specific time."

After a series of squirmy rebuffs, she realized that when Seattleites say, "Let's do something sometime," what they really mean is: "Let's never do anything ever."

Finally, she has "cultivated" - she uses that word to underscore that this wasn't, after all, some natural process - a circle of friends, including some she met on Craig's List, an online bulletin board. On Craig's List, it's apparent not everyone in Seattle is alone because they want to be. Dozens of electronic pleas for friends and "activity partners" are posted each day.

"Will however, it would be fun to have someone to hang out and do something with."

"IT LOOKS LIKE a library in here," O'Brien says, scanning her neighborhood coffee shop, where at least half the customers stare into laptop screens. Others read newspapers or shuffle through paperwork. The only people talking seem to be in some sort of business meeting.

Huh? What did you say? At University Zoka coffee shop near the U. Village, socializing means sharing a table with friends but drowning them out with your own personal soundtrack. From left, University of Washington student Nick Hara plugs into his iPod, Perla Josu'e downloads music on her PowerBook and Fahm Saechao plays "R go on walks alone; troll bookstores alone, then go home and read alone.

"People find their set of activities to do and they are fairly content," O'Brien says.

In fact, Seattle's seeming split personality might come from this very complacency. We don't have anything against you, but simply don't feel the need to take the risk of inviting you into the fold.

And that, Seattle, is the problem, according to O'Brien, who happens to be a member of the Society for the Study of Social Problems.

"On the one hand, it's nice to bop in and out of situations knowing people will smile and treat you well. Nice is like bubble gum - it's sugary and pleasant." But if all you ever get is nice, never flirty or risky, she says, that gum loses its flavor pretty quick, and the human experience becomes ultimately less rewarding. Even depressing.

She cites a famous sociological study of flight attendants, which found being nice all the time is an especially draining kind of work. It can cause the emotional equivalent of repetitive stress injury. At the end of the day, some flight attendants would have trouble turning the nice off. And stuck in nice gear, they became disassociated from their true emotions and had trouble expressing them.

Come to think of it, that sounds a lot like Seattle's singles scene, says Kirkland native Julie Thompson. Seattle's dating doldrums are Thompson's business. She has run a speed-dating outfit and a match-making service, and just launched a social club called Magnetic.

"People here have a real hard time telling if someone likes them," says Thompson. "When a guy asks a girl out, she can't tell, is this a date or a non-date date? And when a girl is nice back, guys say, does she like me or is she just being nice?"

THE MOST BAFFLING thing about the Seattle Freeze is that since the '90s, this city has been majority-owned by outsiders. Sixty percent of us here today are from out of state.

Pam Tate, left, lets her dog, Jett, greet Prin the poodle at Magnuson Park. She says "hi" to Prin's owner, Jan Poore, who smiles but says only, "Come on, Prin." Tate visits the off-leash area each week and knows many of the dogs by name, but none of the owners.

According to the natives, we've trampled everything wonderful about their treasured city, so why haven't we cracked the icy crust?

First, it's an enabling cultural climate for socially inept people. So if you come here and you have any germ of antisociality, it will, like moss, take hold and flourish.

And if you arrive here open and ebullient, you're bound to lose your confidence and spark after enough cold shoulders. After all, why even bother going to that party when you know it will just be more nonchalant chitchat that will never go anywhere?

"If a dog gets smacked every time he sticks his nose out of the cage, guess what happens?" Pam Tate says. "After a while of putting yourself out there and being rebuffed, you just say forget it."

Newcomers seem to acclimate to the social habits along with the weather. We soon learn to lay off our horns and grow less effusive with invitations.

Even Gabriel Tevrizian is more or less a Seattleite now. Since arriving from Argentina, he's turned down the volume on his laugh, no longer reaches out to hug friends and has even stopped wearing his favorite loud red pants. Those first lonely years in the Northwest even gave him a bit of a taste for solitude. Last time he went back to Buenos Aires, he found himself overwhelmed by his own exuberant culture. "I didn't connect that well anymore. I couldn't get any time alone. People were in my face all day long," he says.

So, is assimilation inevitable?

Meet Andrea Martin. She's the leader of the resistance.

After moving here from Los Angeles, Martin's self-esteem took a nose dive. "I always thought I had a good personality, but the reception here had me questioning how I said good morning, how I smiled at people - everything."

After discovering she wasn't alone in her aloneness, she decided Seattle needed a social director. "After all, if you aren't part of the solution..."

What started out as occasional cocktail parties three years ago turned into a social club called Space City Mixer. It now has 8,000 members, most of whom are transplants.

Martin hosts several events each month, things like ladies' brunches, pub mixers and rotating dinner parties. Her goal: To chip away the Seattle Freeze one friendship at a time.

"People don't come because of the actual events," she says. "They come because I'm giving them a way to meet people who want to meet people."

And at these social events, there's always a familiar-sounding conversation going on. It seems to break the ice. It bonds these strangers in a strange land. It starts like this:

"So, have you been finding it's hard to get to know people in Seattle?"

"Julia Sommerfeld is a Seattle Times staff writer. Statistics contributed by Times researcher Gene Balk. Ken Lambert is a Times staff photographer."

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New York Best City For Singles

New York Best City For Singles Cover
Are you single and looking for love? Well, New York is the best place to be because it has been rated at the best U.S. city for singles.

Rounding out the top 10 cities for singles in the U.S.:


1- New York
2- Boston
3- Chicago
4- Seatlle
5- Washington D.C.
6- Atlanta (number 1 last year)
7- San Francisco
8- Los Angeles
9- Milwaukee
10- Philadelphia

It is the first time that New York has been chosen as the best city for singles in a Forbes.com poll that assessed 40 of the biggest U.S. urban areas for coolness (whatever the hell that means), cost of living alone, job growth, online dating, nightlife and ratio of singles to the entire population living in the area.

It was actually the online dating component that led to New York's number 1 status for singles. New Yorkers have the most active online dating accounts than anyone else in the country.

So while it was believed that all New Yorkers were preoccupied mainly by earning more money, it seems that there has been a shift and now love has taken precedence (cue the violins).

So if you're single, are a U.S. citizen and want to get a piece of the action in the dating game, New York is your best bet.

Suggested free e-books to read:

Rob J - How To Get Woman Laid In A Day Or Less
Philip Redhead - Best Places For First Dates
Dylan Morgan - Hypnosis For Beginners

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