Being A Leader By Sinn

Being A Leader By Sinn Image

You must lead the initial interaction with a new women both physically and verbally. This starts from the first eye contact and approach through handling logistics and dealing with LMR. You always have to lead.

Before you can even lead the interaction with an individual women, you are going to have to lead the group's attention for long enough to start a private conversation with the women you are interested in. In order to do this we want to demonstrate THE CHARACTERISTICS OF SOCIAL LEADERSHIP.

1. True leaders demonstrate through both behavior and stories that you inspire loyalty from people. It is very important to convey that when you need others help,they help. No questions asked.

2. The ability to instantly gain people's respect. It is vitally important that the group is at least ok with you being there. The more attention(Respect) you give the obstacles, the more likely they will be to let you stick around generally uninterrupted.

3. The next characteristic is confidence. This mostly comes from believing in what you are doing. When you make a decision, suggest a move, make a joke or even touch a woman, you must look like you think it's going to work. I do this by acting like it's weird when the girls don't like me. You have to put full faith into everything you do. The more you believe what you are doing is going to work even when it isn't, the better you will convey confidence. Confidence is simply a belief in yourself and ability to accomplish anything.

4. A leader has an outcome in mind. He knows what he wants out of the interaction and takes steps towards them. You don't want to be attached to the outcome but you need to have a plan for who you are interested in getting to know better, where you are going to move her to have a private conversation away from her friends, what you are going to suggest going on a date to do at a later time, and how to get her back to your place if the opportunity presents itself. This can also be called handling logistics.

5. The ability to lead physically. You have to take the initiative in establishing a physical relationship. This means you need to touch her early and often. You also should get comfortable leading women around to different parts of the bar or club. You need to be unafraid to try to make a bigger move later on. Learn to look at touching like bringing up a map in a video game. You are learning where you are at the time.

6. The last characteristic of leadership is being unreactive to negative social feedback. The only reason people react to things is because they think that they somehow help themselves gain something they want or they want to avoid something unpleasant happening.

Imagine a 6 year old girl telling you to leave her alone. You probably wouldn't have a huge emotional reaction. However if the most beautiful women you ever saw told you to leave her alone, you'd be devastated because of the perceived loss her negative social behavior made you feel. True leaders believe in themselves enough that they don't feel the need to acknowledge anything that doesn't help them.

Which brings us to the number one rule of pick up which is to ignore anything that doesn't help you. This works on the theory of magnification. Meaning that while having a great comeback when a woman tests you makes you look smart simply ignoring it and changing the subject demonstrates the confidence and dominance of a true leader.

There you guys have my characteristics for leading in social situations.

Till next week,


Suggested free e-books to read:

Elizabeth Leary - 10 Min Guide To Leadership
Michael Hall - Getting The Edge In Business

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Online Dating For Single Men

Online Dating For Single Men Cover
No matter what your age, height, weight or physical appearance, there are thousands of women out there eager to meet you and eager for your company...whether short-term or long-term relationships are what you want. If you have found yourself suddenly “on-the-market” again after a relationship has dissolved or are just too busy with your work to spend a lot of time looking for a lady to keep you company, online dating can open the door to the dating scene for you.

The good news is that all you need is a computer and an internet connection to get started. The first thing to do is find an online dating site that fits your needs. There are the large sites that offer many extras like live video chat and even match you up with ladies using your profiles and, also, a lot of sites that cater to special interests like religious preferences, outdoor enthusiasts, gays, etc. You need to choose one or two that will meet your needs. I don’t recommend the free sites. The paid sites have a money back guarantee if you aren’t satisfied and the investment is small. A whole month costs less than one dinner and movie date.

The next thing you need to do is write a killer, but honest, profile and upload a recent but flattering picture of yourself. Now you are all set. Start contacting ladies whose profiles sound interesting to you and answer any lady who contacts you...and do so promptly...not, however, on holidays or weekends. You don’t want to appear that desperate. Don’t give up after a month and think you will never find the right lady for you. New people join online dating services daily and at least half of them are ladies many, of whom, will want to meet you.

Chatrooms are a great place to meet potential friends, and perhaps a potential partner. What's nice about chatroom dating is you don't have to dress up and pass visual inspection to go there and enjoy some great conversations. The anonymity of a chatroom means that if you mess up or don't want to continue to get to know the other people/person, you can just leave the chatroom. If you don't want to be known by who you were then you can simply change your nickname. This is not a license to be obnoxious, but it does give you plenty of room to practice making friends with strangers. Here are some tips to help you out when using chatrooms.


Don't reveal private information

Be careful about the information you give in casual conversation. Don't give any hint of your work place, your home town or other personal info that can be linked to where you come from. It is vital that you use common sense when using a chatroom. If someone spent two weeks in a chatroom and wrote down everything you said, how easy would it be for them to identify you? Be careful never to reveal too many details about yourself.

Protect your identity

If you want total control of the information that is revealed to the world through chatrooms, don't use your personal or your work-related email. You should sign up for an email account specifically to use for chatting online like Yahoo, Gmail, or Hotmail. If the chatroom you like to use has a profile link, be sure to keep the information you provide generic, like just your age and gender.

Listen to your head

Use your common sense and judgment. If someone sounds creepy or a bit dodgey, there's a good chance they are. If someone's flirting is getting a bit out of hand for your liking, then speak up or change your email address and nickname.

Suggested ebooks:

Joseph Matthews - Meeting Dating And Seducing Women
Brian Caniglia - Online Dating Secrets

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Dating Tips Importance Of First Date

Dating Tips Importance Of First Date Image
You can forget everything in life but it is almost impossible to forget first date. Few wise decisions can make it a life time experience and some bad decision can ruin your life. There are few tips which you can follow on first date to make it nice:

- Always behave properly and look fashionable with decent clothes. Don't wear clothes like super models.

- Look good and carry positive attitude, try to create good atmosphere for you and your partner

- It is important to feel comfortable and create comfort for your partner

- Don't share your past experience with your first date.

- Always try to know each other nicely by questioning like favourite colour, sports, food, clothes, movie, actor, actress etc.

- It is advisable to choose a nice location for first date, a nice restaurant or coffee shop can be a best choice.

- Don't run too fast and never ask for address or anything else.

- Telephone or mobile number can be a best way to contact.

- Never forget to give a decent gift to girl at the end of the day, it will leave a nice impression on her about your personality.

Suggested free e-books to read:

C Kellogg - Top Dating Tips For Weary Singles
Angelica Jackson - Flirting Tips For The 21st Century
Dating Insider - Getting The First Date

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Addressing Womens Emotional Needs

Addressing Womens Emotional Needs Cover
I've found that for a lot of people (including me), at times their PU game is tight. But their relationship management skills suck bigtime. This article by Frank B Kermit (from the montreal lair) helps address womens emotional needs and makes hooking relationships that much easier.

Frank has several books on and the one where he speaks about addressing womens emotional needs (there are 10 of them) 'Everything out of her mouth is a test' is the pick of the bunch. An excellent matrix-aware treatise on relationship management.

Other matrix aware books on relationship management would be (in no particular order):

Franco's excellent ebook on Seduction for Husbands and Players

David Deida's Way of the Superior Man

Mark Cunningham's Building a Better Girlfriend (bit hypnotic and sneaky for my tastes, but seems to be pretty solid)

So enough babble - here's the good stuff

How and Why Women Test Men and About What...

Here it is: My Frank B Kermit Philosophy on Men, Women and Relationships and the definition of a test.

A TEST: is when a woman says or does something, specifically to evoke a reaction out of a man, whether verbal or action based. It is a SUB-CONSCIOUS mechanism that a woman uses to find out about what kind of man she is dealing with. It is the predictor and basis for all sexual attraction and love she will have for a man. Every test is designed to make her feel special (your lover) when a man passes it, or makes her feel un-special (thus turns her into your mother) if you fail it.

At least, that is how I see it.

During the process of my development, I went searching for one or two unifying themes to apply as a rule when I attempted to analyze relationships between men and women.

I came up with the following:

The Frank B Kermit theory:

1-Everything out of her mouth is a test (even when it is not, treat it as so anyways)

2-A woman can only fit into 1 OF 2 roles in any mans life. Mother or Lover.

3-She constantly tests you to see what role she should follow

4-Within each test is an emotional need being communicated

5-If you address the emotional need, you pass the test, she feels attracted to you, she gets to be your lover and you have sex

6-If you do not address the emotional need, you fail the test, she loses attraction to you, she is forced to assume the role of your mother and you do not get sex

and the final part to this:

7-A women always tests because her instinct to mother is stronger than her instincts for sex

I have identified 10 emotional-need categories, but for the purposes of this book, I will only list the category names here, and not a lengthy description of each.

The 10 Emotional Needs of a Woman

1-The protection of her most valuable asset: Her Reputation

2-Women want to FEEEEL a range of emotions. Do not try to make her happy, give her a full range from fury to ecstasy. This is a.k.a. her Drama Cookie

3-Cater to the little girl in her. Know the difference when to ignore her ramblings and when she needs you to give her a hug. Sometimes she just needs to be reassured like a little kid

4-Be dominant and take responsibility for leading the relationship. This includes making all the decisions, and taking 100% responsibility for the sex in the relationship. It all has to be the mans fault

5-She fears abandonment. This is part biological programming, as in the event she is left with a child, she needs to be sure that she will not be abandoned, and left alone to care for it. This covers her emotional need to feel secure.

6-Trust. The key here is if she can trust you to be honest with her; even if you know she will not like what you have to say. In a womans reality, she is used to people lying to her ALL THE TIME because of the way she looks, or they simply want something from her. If you are willing to piss her off with your honesty, you have demonstrated that she can trust you.

7-Her physical safety. A man must demonstrate that he is capable of protecting her physically from the threats of the outside world. This is to make her feel safe.

8-Women need to know you can handle her TRUE sexuality. She will only be as wonton with you as you demonstrate that you can handle it. She needs to explore her sexuality and let it be free with you as a Natural Woman

9-Prove that you have high quality sperm by showing other girls want to have sex (procreate) with you, and/or you are a good catch and he kids with you will also be a good catch enough to also attract a mate.

10-Prove that you are not a homosexual. She knows every homosexual male friend she has that is not out of the closet yet. Could you be one too?

Regardless of what she tests you with, if you can spot one of these ten emotional needs in-between her words and you address that need by your communication and actions, you will pass the test, and she will by default feel attraction for you, and desire to be your lover.

I think what happens in most relationships is that a man attracts a woman as his lover, and over time, she becomes more like his mother to him, thus sacrificing her attraction to him. In my unscientific-based opinion, that is when the relationship starts to die.

That is my theory anyways. So far, it has worked for me

(Credit - Frank B Kermit at )

Get his book on relationship management \'Everything Out of Her Mouth is a TEST: A Man\'s Guide to Satisfying the Emotional Needs of Women\'

Suggested free e-books to read:

Ross Quigley - Beautiful Women Prefer Nerds
David Deangelo - On Being A Man Seminar Slides
Carlos Xuma - Dating Questions And Answers

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Book Review A Little Bit Married

Book Review A Little Bit Married Cover
Have you ever moved in with someone and done everything that married couples do, except that you never actually went the route of actually getting married? Well, that's the gist of what" Little Bit "is all about.

HANNAH SELIGSON finally puts a name to what many have been doing of late; moving in together, smelling each other's crap, getting way too comfortable, but never actually having taken the plunge.

HANNAH SELIGSON gives you (namely women) the necessary tools to figure out if this man you're "practically" married to actually has any plans that involve diamonds and a walk down the aisle.

Because most long-term relationships tend to slide into this comfort zone without the actual implications of marriage, many wonder if the person they're waiting around for actually has any plan of taking that last and incredibly important step.

HANNAH SELIGSON gets readers to take a good, hard look at the tough questions and conclude whether or not this is the real deal or just a long-term comfort for the other person. She asks:

* What are the signs that this person is ready for a long-term deal?
* How do the two of you make decisions regarding big ticket items like careers, living arrangements and religion?
* How long should you stay in a relationship like this before it's time to get married or move on?

So if you are currently in such a bind, perhaps it's time to enlist the help of HANNAH SELIGSON.


By Hannah Seligson

Suggested free e-books to read:

Brad P - Club Game And Social Circle Visual Aid
Thundercat - Mystery Interview The Fifth Archetype
Adam Gilad - Interview With Kelly Morrisey

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5 Good Things About My Worst Date Ever

5 Good Things About My Worst Date Ever Image
I’ve never been a big dater; I’ve had boyfriends (and two girlfriends), but most of them I met through friends or at parties, and our romantic relationships grew out of being friends first. Actual first dates, complete with jittery nerves, fashion angst and awkward conversation aren’t my forte. The whole trying-to-get-to-know-someone-in-an-hour thing makes nervous, and seems way too much like a job interview that something conducive to finding someone I could fall in love with. But since I’m 34, single and looking to be in a relationship, I figured I should finally give online dating a try, so I signed up for OkCupid and HowAboutWe.

The results have been mixed, but I want to share five things I learned about a Very Bad Date that might help you in the dating jungle. I had proposed the date – a free comedy show at the Knitting Factory in Brooklyn – on HowAboutWe. The premise of the site is that you either respond to cool-sounding dates, or propose your own. This was a show I’d been wanting to check out for over a year, so I figured I’d rather do so with company. It took us about a month before we were both free. I knew very little about the guy, but was excited about the prospect of meeting someone new.

Well, my expectations were on the high side – the very high side, as it turns out – but I’m still glad I went on the date. Here are five reasons why:

1. Getting Dressed Up is Fun No Matter What

That day, I put on a flower-pattern Yumi Kim dress, got a manicure and pedicure and – something that’s a challenge for me – managed to fit all my stuff into my shiny new red purse, so as to make a good impression, rather than lugging my usual three to four giant bags. My date didn’t say a word about what I was wearing; now, he doesn’t have to, and maybe he wasn’t impressed, but a small compliment goes a long way. But wearing the outfit and matching bag, taking the time to make sure I looked my best, made me feel good even if he didn’t appreciate it.

2. I Realized I Have Good Social Skills

I’d arrived uncharacteristically on time, and proceeded to look around and order a seltzer, then get a table. He came in about five minutes later, which was fine … until he told me he’d seen me come in. What? That struck me as creepy; he’d known I was in there and deliberately waited five minutes before joining me. I’m often late, but I would never do that to someone.

He’d recently been on a trip abroad, so I tried to draw him out about the trip, with little luck; for the most part, I got one-word answers. I was frantically trying to come up with things to talk about, but instead got really odd answers (such as “I live in the Bronx and Brooklyn”) that I couldn’t figure out how to follow up on. I was starting to feel a little crazy, until I realized that I’d tried my best, and that sometimes it’s better to just be silent and wait it out. I may not be the perfect conversation partner, and sometimes ask too intense questions on a first date, but at least I didn’t revert into silent mode.

I’d finished my seltzer and was sucking on the ice, a clear sign that it was time for him to at least offer to get me a drink. I’m not a dinner whore by any means but that would’ve been the polite thing to do. Instead, I got up to get my own drink, and offered to get him one. He declined, but when I returned and said the bartender had comped my seltzer, he replied (perhaps his most egregious dating faux pas), “If I’d known it was free, I’d have asked you to get me one.”

The situation was so ridiculous I couldn’t help but be amused and again, give myself a pat on the back for having the graciousness to offer him a drink.

3. I Got to See a Fun Comedy Show

The comedy show wasn’t the best I’d ever seen (one guy talked about how he fantasized about chopping his exes’ heads off and making a mobile over his head!) but there were enough funny moments, including a guest appearance by 30 Rock’s Judah Friedlander, that I laughed more than a few times. I was very glad we were not on a dinner date where the lack of chemistry would’ve seemed interminable.

4. I Flirted With A Cute Guy (Not My Date)

Now, this may be a cardinal sin of dating – thou shall not flirt with other people while on a date. But first let me say that I didn’t start it. When I finally broke the deafening silence at my table to get myself another seltzer, I ran into a guy I’d had a few dates with last year. He complimented me on my outfit, which made me smile, and sort of made up for my date not doing so. I was tempted to simply ditch my date and hang out with him, but I didn’t, though I did drop him a line when I got home, sharing the highlights of my date, and we’ve been emailing ever since.

5. Instead of Feeling Sorry for Myself, I Got “Out There”

I think I had this fantasy that the minute I conceded to the world of online dating, the perfect person would be waiting at the click of a button. Clearly, not so much. Still, if I hadn’t met him in person, I’d never have know that, and just by being out, rather than slumped in front of my TV or laptop, I felt more confident. And I might’ve even parlayed it into a date – with someone who’ll actually talk to me.

Tell us: Would you rather go on a bad date than not date at all? Share your Good Bad Date stories!

Suggested free e-books to read:

Helen Ferry - Get The Facts About Condoms
David Deangelo - Double Your Dating Sex Secrets
Joseph Matthews - The Boyfriend Is Not An Obstacle

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Online Dating Safety For Women

Online Dating Safety For Women Cover
Online dating can be a fun and certainly a rewarding experience for women of all ages. Maintaining your safety while doing it is simply a combination of using common sense and exercising good judgment. Online safety rules are the same as real world safety rules.

You wouldn’t give your name, address and phone number to a strange man that you met in a bar or on the street so you should never do that online either. Play it safe. Get to know this man who could turn out to be Prince Charming before you give out any information that could make it possible for him or others to trace you. Don’t tell a stranger exactly where you work. Say that you are a legal secretary (if that’s what you are) for a mid-sized law firm….not that you work for Brown, Smith and Jones Attorneys-at-law. It is safe to tell him what city you live in but you should wait to be any more specific than that until you have been chatting and exchanging emails for awhile.

Use only the tools provided by the dating service you belong to. Most offer chat and private email on their site. Do not give out your isp email address. If you must give out an email address make it a free one such as Hotmail or Yahoo. Your isp address is traceable for anyone who wants to go to the trouble.

When the time comes for you to have your first face-to-face, make that first meeting in a public place and during day light hours. Take a friend with you or arrange for one to call you on your cell soon after the arranged meeting. ARE in control so do not let anyone pressure you into revealing more personal information than you are comfortable with revealing.

Suggested ebooks:

Ken Lingu - Erotic Massage For Women
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Nice Girls Do It Too

Nice Girls Do It Too Cover
It is absolutely true that when online dating sites first started they were populated entirely by perverts, sexual predators, weirdoes, social misfits and emotional wrecks but that is no longer true. Online dating has gone mainstream and has lost all the social stigma it once suffered. Single people of all ages, races, religions and both sexes do it. Short people, tall people, thin people, obese people do it. People from every developed country in the world do it. Nice girls do it, too. The reasons people join online dating sites are as varied as the people who join but mostly they join for three very good reasons: (1) Time (2) Money and (3) It works.

Time: You can go through hundreds of online profiles and look at hundreds of pictures in the same length of time only one real world date takes and the screening is already done for you. You can tell right away if a guy is only looking for casual relationships or long term commitments. How many times have you worked 8 hours, gone home and spent another hour getting ready to go out then gone to the local hang-out for singles only to see the same old jerks, losers and drunks that are always there?

Money: For the price of one evening out on the town you can enjoy an entire month of meeting men from the safety of your own home….do it in your jammies or sweats and with a beauty facial working its magic.

It works. It really does work if you are willing to do the right things. Write a profile that grabs attention, post recent pictures of yourself, be fun and interesting while chatting with the men you meet on line, answering emails promptly and being on time for a pre-arranged online meeting.

Suggested ebooks:

Tyler Durden - Girls Who Want To Be Forced
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Clinical Psychology

Clinical Psychology Image
I stole this very cool video from ~C4Chaos. A nice Saturday morning dharma teaching.


Presented by Shinzen Young.

The purpose of this talk is threefold: (1) to describe how senior adepts use mindfulness to reduce suffering and gain insight into selfhood and emotions. (2) To point out how the method they use in many ways parallels what scientists do when confronted with a complex and inscrutable system in nature. (3) To discuss how this fundamental parallelism between the two endeavors can become the basis for a productive collaboration in the future.

Bio: Shinzen Young became fascinated with Asian culture while a teenager in Los Angeles. Later he enrolled in the Ph.D. program in Buddhist Studies at the University of Wisconsin. Eventually, he went to Asia and did extensive training in each of the three major Buddhist meditative traditions: Vajrayana, Zen, and Vipassana. Upon returning to the United States, his intellectual interests shifted to the burgeoning dialogue between Eastern internal science and Western technological science. In recognition of his original contributions to that dialogue, the Institute of Transpersonal Psychology has awarded him an honorary doctorate. Shinzen's innovative techniques for pain management derived from two sources: The first is his personal experience dealing with discomfort during intense periods of meditation in Asia, and during shamanic ceremonies with tribal cultures. The second is some three decades of experience in coaching people through a wide spectrum of chronic and acute pain challenges. Shinzen leads meditation retreats in the mindfulness tradition throughout North America, and has helped establish several centers and programs.

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Dating An Old Crush Part Ii

Dating An Old Crush Part Ii Cover
It took many months for the wound caused by Dave's harsh words to close. Not heal. Just close. Other things in my life took over. The stress of my job became too much. I lost some weight. My grandfather died. I fell in love again. Got hurt again. And decided to send myself on a trip to South America to volunteer - alone. A year after my romance with Dave, I found myself in a hostel in Buenos Aires during the worst weather conditions Argentina had seen in seven years. Dave's parents were from Argentina and he had many aunts and uncles and cousins in Buenos Aires. I needed some support. I was alone and scared and cold in a foreign country thousands of miles away from home. So I emailed Dave for help. Within hours he replied saying that it would be his pleasure to connect me with his cousin. The next day Ben, and his girlfriend, Maria, picked me up at the hostel. For four days, the couple gave me the royal treatment. They took me on tours of the city and to the outskirts where the wineries are. They showed me the beaches and introduced me to their friends. All in all, they helped me salvage what remained of my trip. Apparently Dave had mentioned in his email to Ben that I was "someone special" to him. I was very grateful... and confused.

South America was not the answer to my life's questions as I hoped it would be. In fact, it was a terrifying experience. I spent the next year trying to establish myself again in Montreal. Things just didn't feel right for me. I continued to chase after the guy (the one from across the bar at Shangai - See Dating an Old Crush Part 1) who would, inevitably, break my heart over and over and decided to move back to New York to try to restore myself permanently. So I sold my car, packed my life up in two suitcases, made my mother cry, and left - again.

Suggested free e-books to read:

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Are Girls Ready For Motherhood At 14

Are Girls Ready For Motherhood At 14 Cover
According to award-winning author HILARY MANTEL (who I admit, I never heard of until today), girls are ready to start having and raising babies at 14.

The 57-year-old author believes that society is mistakenly running on a male timetable that dictates that women should be having babies at an older age, when, in fact, they would be better off having kids when they are teenagers and then returning to school to resume a career in their 30s.

"Having sex and having babies is what young women are about, and their instincts are suppressed in the interests of society's timetable," said Mantel.

"I was perfectly capable of setting up and running a home when I was 14, and if, say, it had been ordered differently, I might have thought, 'Now is the time to have a couple of children and when I am 30, I will go back and I'll get my PhD'."

Her views are being met with a very mixed response, especially considering the Britain has the highest teen pregnancy rate in all of Western Europe. Of course, Mantel is suggesting that women marry and raise a family at 14; not just have kids.

It's also noteworthy to point out that Mantel suffered a painful illness in her 20s that left her unable to have kids.

In my mom's day, girls marrying and having children once they hit puberty was the norm; nowadays, 14-year-olds can barely tie their shoes without needing someone to help them.

What do you think?

Read the rest at

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Best Love Poems For Your Girlfriend

Best Love Poems For Your Girlfriend Image


You came into my life so quick,

A gorgeous pleasant surprise,

I hoped you wouldn't give me the flick,

Then, a beautiful friendship did arise.

Our bond was so very strong,

It couldn't help but turn into love,

We wondered if going further was wrong,

But we fit each other like a glove.

It feels so right to be so near,

To feel like we are but one,

Sometimes our love is worth a tear,

Those tears of joy, I'm sure there are more to come

It really is love, my baby,

The longing for one anothers lips,

You are my beautiful young lady,

I know it as we dance with my hands upon your hips.

Author: Meg


If not for you, I wouldn't know

What true love really meant.

I'd never feel this inner peace;

I couldn't be content.

If not for you, I'd never have

The pleasures of romance.

I'd miss the bliss, the craziness,

Of love's sweet, silly dance.

I have to feel your tender touch;

I have to hear your voice;

No other one could take your place;

You're it; I have no choice.

If not for you, I'd be adrift;

I don't know what I'd do;

I'd be searching for my other half,

Incomplete, if not for you.

Author: "Joanna Fuchs"

Suggested free e-books to read:

Steve Scott - More Than Friends How To Turn Your Female Friend Into Your Girlfriend
Philip Redhead - Best Places For First Dates
Rosa Nouchette Carey - Lover Or Friend

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Getting Womens Number And Getting Dates

Getting Womens Number And Getting Dates Image


Hi Dave,

After reading your book, I put many of your tactics into action. I work in a casino, so I get to meet a lot of beautiful young women. Once I got over the initial reluctance to ask them for their email/phone number, I started getting quite a few numbers in a night.

The other night there was a woman who was so gorgeous, it hurt. I walked over and chatted with her for a few minutes, then asked if she had email. She said "Sure, I do! Let me write it down for you." Without asking she put down her phone number as well. The younger guys who work for me now call me a "God". They have no idea how I can do it. Better looking guys are complaining that I get more phone numbers and emails in one night than they've got their whole lives. One of the women was classic. She looked like Sheryl Crow and Jennifer Aniston combined. She complained she wasn't winning on the machine and asked me what the secret was. I said, "I don't know the secret today, but if I figure it out, I'll email it to you. All I need now is your email address and your phone number in case email is down." She was taken aback, but asked for my pen and wrote it down. Now instead of being alone on my days off, I have a lot of options which are all great ones. Thanks for your advice and changing me out of wuss mode. I.


Options are great, aren't they?

And isn't it amazing how a woman will give out her email and number if you just talk for a few minutes and then ask for it?

I can remember when I first started learning this stuff it seemed to me that no woman in her right mind would just give out her phone number to a complete stranger

But then I discovered that no woman is actually IN her right mind! (Or at least this is my logical deduction, because they all seem to give out their phone numbers and email addresses so readily!)

But to get back to the concept of "options"

When you, as a guy, have options, it changes EVERYTHING.

When you have a date that evening plus three women to email or call, things are TOTALLY DIFFERENT than when you have nothing going on.

You feel different, you talk different, and you communicate in a different way.

I believe that one of the reasons that attractive women come across so powerfully is because they KNOW that they have options.

And one of the benefits of learning how to be more successful with women and dating is that you learn to CREATE YOUR OWN OPTIONS. When you know that you can walk out the door anytime you want and meet women, it frees up a lot of mental energy that was previously focused on other things. Energy you can use to improve other areas of your life

Thanks for your email it's inspiring.


Hey, David.

I've read DYD, have been getting your newsletters, totally understand what's going on. I've seen it working, and know it's for real. But I've got a BIG problem. I've got to recondition myself from more years than I care to admit of doing things the wrong way. I always idolized superheroes like Batman Superman who always acted with the utmost respect and decorum. Like muscle-bound male versions of Miss Manners. My heroes were modest, reliable, helpful, well-mannered, and strong (OK -- they're not *totally* lame). Definitely not *cocky*. I always *hated* mouthy guys who are all show and no go.

As for sex, in my younger years it was Catholic training: everything sexual was *evil* (unless you're a priest hitting on the altar boys), and I was so naive and mixed up I really thought I was going to *hell*.

After I wised up and dropped that it was *sexual harassment* that I kept hearing about all the time. The message I got then is that it's not OK to be sexual until you're already going with someone. Of course now I know that that only applies to man who a woman is NOT ATTRACTED TO. OK, so now I *understand*. But am still reflexively *doing* the same wrong things. What's the best way to actually go about reconditioning my *behavior*? I can be a good smartass when I have the right stimuli, but what's the best way to practice loosening up with the sex talk? I don't want to klutz things up with awkward, forced attempts on women who *are* good prospects. I can be cool enough to get dates, but want to take it to the next level. The best thing I can think of is either to practice on female *friends* I've already written off or go to places I don't really care to hang around regularly, like techno-disco meat markets where I probably couldn't be as crude and crass as the average ass-grabber if I slammed a fifth of Daniels and *tried*.

This may apply to a lot of other guys who are "struggling with the material." Any better ideas how to get through the learning curve as quickly as possible without poisoning one's reputation by being tagged an uber-klutz? FB Michigan


Well, you say that you've read my book, but you need to go back through it remember, it's a reference manual, to be referred to again and again not a fictional book to be used as


If I were you, I'd get online and start chatting with women with instant messenger services and/or in chatrooms, as I describe in Chapter 7.

Bust on them, tease them, talk about every topic you can think of, including sex (make sure you're talking to women who are of legal age, by the way!).

You'll find that starting conversations with women online and practicing your skills is a lot more convenient when you can do it from the comfort of your computer. And you'll see it's very easy to talk with women about any topic. Get over your preconceived ideas, and just do it.

And get over this worshipping Batman, dude. Didn't you see the Saturday Night Live skits where they were mocking him and Robin as the "Ambiguously Gay Duo?"

Not good role models, man.


Dave my man,

I've been reading your advice for a while now and I have to laugh because I discovered several years ago cocky and funny really work. I am naturally cocky and a smartass to boot, so it usually worked, but not always. Then, my buddy told me something that drives 'em wild. The dude is 6'3 and 300 lbs, and he always had a good looking woman on his arm. His advice: Show a little interest, then ignore them. Of course I over simplified it, but you know what I mean. How many men have said that you can't pick up women in a topless bar? I did all the time, and rarely spent any more money than on drinks for myself. The other guys are feeding the girls dollar bills and getting no where. I'm just an average looking guy, but the honies went for it like mad. You are on the mark and anyone that has problems meeting women should heed your advice. PS: I love the way you bust on the chicks that write to you and say how wrong you are!



lol thanks!

Yes, women really love it when you show some interest, but then don't hang on them. Women, and especially attractive women, LOVE a good challenge. It's fun for them.

And yes, I do enjoy emails from women both positive and negative. I just wish more women would write me! (And I wish that when they did write that they'd send PICTURES! I have gotten a few, but cummon!)


Wasssup! I just have to tell ya that i think your a god to all guys out there who have trouble with women! I've been reading your e-mails for about two months now and i gotta tell ya, you're a genius! I haven't even purchased the book yet but everything you say makes perfect sense. So i have decided to purchase Double Your Dating. I can't wait to see how it works out. I have the hardest time meeting women and the bad thing about it is most girls think im good looking. But they think im boring.

Here's my question to you. Im not sure about the whole cf thing, how do i be cocky yet not come across as an a*hole? And I've really never been the funny type of guy i just don't know how without saying or doing something that might make me look like a wussy. Can you help a bro out PLEASE?



OK, here's the basic formula for Cocky Funny:

Take an arrogant comment, then add humor.

It's a killer combination. The key is that it HAS TO BE FUNNY. It actually has to make others laugh.

You must make sure that you are Cocky enough, because if you're only FUNNY, then you will come across as GOOFY, which isn't what you want.

So, for instance, you might be at a bar, and you're having a drink. Let's say your drink has too much alcohol in it, and you're going to comment on it.

An arrogant comment might be:

"This bartender sucks. There's too much booze

in my drink.

Add a touch of humor, and it turns into:

"Whoa, this bartender either loves me or is trying to kill me. This drink is pure alcohol. Is there an AA meeting nearby? Cuz I'm gonna need it when I'm done with this one."

You feel me?

It's the COMBINATION that makes Cocky Funny work like magic. Too little or too much of either and you will come off as an idiot.

And remember, have fun. Practice is what will help you improve.

(If you're reading this right now, and you KNOW that you need to brush up on your "Cocky Funny", then go get yourself a copy of my "Cocky Comedy" DVD/CD program. It's the ULTIMATE education on Cocky Funny, and you can only get it here:



Man, life has changed over the last 4 months since grabbing your book and applying CF! My friends are amazed at how many women I am dating and life is great! One of the most important points I have followed from you is breaking down the whole pickup/dating/score routine and approaching each part as a skill I must learn. Got past the email/phone number part, past the first date and first kiss part, and finally the step towards intimacy. But alas, I'm down to the one skill that I have problems with and that I've never seen you really address: The graceful exit skill Let me explainOK, I meet a girl, we go out, maybe we end up in each other's arms, maybe not, but there comes a point when I just want to end it and move on to another girl. I always get nervous with the "Well, it's been fun, but we this isn't going to work out so have a good life" Do I call and leave a voice mail? Do I phone her? Do I break it off face-to-face? What's the confident, CF way to leave a girl and not have PLAYER stamped onto my forehead because of it? Loving life, S.R. P.S. You should pay people for referrals as I have got about 10 of my friends to buy your book! HA HA


You're a very, very, very bad man.

In the best way possible, of course.

I think the key to dating more than one woman, or to not seeing a woman more than once or twice is to NOT ACT LIKE YOU'RE HER BOYFRIEND FROM THE BEGINNING.

Women will only resent you if you mislead them. So don't. It's not necessary.

Just have fun, be straight up, and enjoy


You don't have to break something off if it never was "something" to begin with. Are you with me?

The big mistake is to call twice a day, see her five times a week, act like her long lost love, and then drop her without explanation.

I think you get what I'm saying.



I have been subscribing to the newsletter for about 6 or 8 months and have purchased your ebook a couple after subscribing. Your information has been invaluable and well worth the price. It has completely changed the way I look at women, I never pine over them anymore and wonder "what's wrong with me". Now I know what was wrong with me, I was a wuss! But that's all changed now and have become the Jedi Master. I've even come up with some Jedi Techniques of my own.

At any rate, I met this one girl at a party one night who I knew came with a few acquaintances of mine who I told about the party. I got to talking to her and we talked for a few minutes and poured on the CF, but I never got her info. I know, I know, the 3 minute technique, but I knew I could obtain it from her friends, and the way she interacted with me, I knew she wouldn't have minded at all (Important Note: this is my success story, I wouldn't recommend doing things like this unless you have developed the confidence that your book helps teach). Well, I never had to even asked her friends because two days later, she ended up looking me up in the University's online student directory and then she looked up my IM name and IMed me with a "mysterious person" message. I immediately figured out it was her and then accused her of stalking me and told her that's pretty illegal. She almost thought I was mad at her! It was great! Anyways, she is a real quality girl (not to mention about a 9, not perfect, but gorgeous nonetheless) and we set something up to go play pool at a local bar where I again poured it on thick. Now mind you, I hadn't made any big advances or anything but as she dropped me off back home, she came in to use the bathroom. After she came out, she wrapped her arms around me and let me have a little taste. I said goodnight to her and that was that night. A few nights later, I told her I was going to be cooking and that she should come over which leads me to

Tip 1
One of the best techniques is to invite a girl over for dinner at your place, especially if you know how to cook. I find that many women don't know how to cook or only "cook" stuff like Mac and Cheese and other junk. The best part about this is they get to see your skill, which is pretty attractive to women when you can make a good meal, and you have the most control because it is your own place. The other part, is make sure you don't start making dinner until she is already at your place, she's not getting an entirely free meal! Make her help. If she refuses, use the CF techniques and have her do something. Put her on a task that's not too difficult so she can't mess it up. For example, if you're making lasagna, make her grate cheese or something (making her wash dishes is rather insulting unless you're doing most of them and she wants to help, which she just might). And when you're all done with dinner, take it to the couch and turn on the TV or watch a movie or something. Which brings me to

Tip 2
If you're sitting down next to a girl that you're talking to in a private setting and you get a little of that silence, not the awkward kind, but the kind where you just kind of look at each other. If you're thinking to yourself "should I be kissing her?". The answer is a screaming "YES". This can be preceded by the "kiss Test" as well, but I know a lot of guys will still have insecurities about this kind of thing.Think about it this way. If you don't kiss her, then she'll probably think you're a wuss because you don't have the balls to do something she probably wants you to anyways. After talking with a number of my girl-friends, I've found out that if a guy tries to kiss a girl, unless there is an obvious unattraction, she will most likely go with the kiss. At any rate, in this day and age, she's not going to slap you and walk out the door. It's not like you grabbed her crotch or something.

Tip 3
MC from the Mediterranean asked a question about calling the next day. I just wanted to point out you have already answered this

question in some form and you know what to do! You can generally sense if a girl is sensitive about something like that. If not, send her some sort of message that next day, preferably email, but if you're on the phone, have something you're on the way to or busy with. Call, say "hi" and that you had a great time, don't ask how she's doing or what she thinks about what or if she had a good time, but find some way to use CF to make a light conversation that will keep her wondering and even thinking about you. Don't bring up the sex unless she does so in a favorable manner.

Tip 4
Not so much a getting girls technique, but rather something you need to do alone. In your spare time or even when doing mindless tasks, go over your past failed attempts when you have a clear head about them and think about what happened. You'd be surprised at how easy it is to find the things that went wrong. You'll also be surprised to find out that these are probably mistakes you make all the time! This is the best way to recognize the problem and rectify it so that its not repeated. Your techniques are nearly priceless and have stroked the confidence of guys everywhere. I've even recommended it to friends that have some serious wuss problems. I have yet to see if they've taken it to heart or even subscribed, but I'll help them yet! Things are going great with that girl and I know it wouldn't have happened if it weren't for your book. Its now become second nature, and you get all the credit. Thanks again Dave Your once Jedi Apprentice, now Master, D.M.


Great ideas great.

Nothing else needs to be said

Except that you stole those ideas from me, loser.




I'd just like to say your book helped in my confidence level and my cocky/funny routine. I have always been funny and was always successful at making women laugh. I had the problem of, well, closing the deal. I would strike the conversation, make them laugh, and just joke with em, but could never get their #. And I would never ask at the right times, being shot down was a large part of my night.

After reading your book, I met and talked to this girl online. At this point I didnt care about relationships or anything. I just wanted to have fun. So we talk about 3 days online, and I called her maybe 1 time and asked her to lunch. The whole lunch I am making her laugh and break out a little of the cocky routine. She's laughing and we both having a good time. Later this month it will be 6 months that we've been together and I just recently was told, that she tried everything she knew the first 2 weeks to turn me on. Shes easily a "8-9 and any other man would have given in and been the "proverbial" wussy. Let me tell you cocky/funny/un-clingy = ATTRACTION. It works, it really does! Thanks for the confidence boost. I just have to give you kudos to what you have discovered here. I think you have solved the "8th" wonder of the world: Women and dating.

You da man K.N. Ohio


You're welcome

And you're right: Most attractive women DON'T KNOW WHAT THE HELL TO DO when they meet a guy that is charming, funny, "un-clingy" and in control of himself and the situation.

They get turned on, they think about you all the time, and they generally feel a level of ATTRACTION that they can't control (and don't want to control, because they love it!).

Good job, and I'm glad to hear that you've found a nice girl for yourself. MAKE SURE YOU DON'T TURN INTO A WUSS-BAG and screw it up!


hey dave,

you are really the man! i started reading your material and realized what i wuss i had been with the one girl i dated. before we were dating i was textbook cocky and funny, but after we were dating i became super-wuss man and i became "just a friend". well every girl since then has been absoultely begging for my attention (even girls I meet online that live hundreds of miles away that i practice on). i have two or three girls call everyday but i'm always too "busy" to talk for very long (hey i have to watch my sportscenter) I was on an airplane to NYC when this hott girl sits down in the seat next to me (i was window and she was aisle) i had my laptop out and when she sat down i acted like i didnt notice. well a few minutes later i had to put away my laptop so I pulled out a book and began reading it. she then pulls out makeup (yes makeup) and starts putting it on in the plane. i gave her a funny look and said "didnt you have time to do that at home?" Her: "(laughing) i did have time, but i didnt want to. all i'm doing today is flying." Me: "oh I see(pause) you're lazy." Her: "no i'm not" Me: "sure you are. but then you saw me and decided you want to look good right? Her: (just laughs) Me: "hey, dont worry about it nothing new to me." Her: "(laughs) well i mean" Me: "(interrupting her) it's fine! dont be embarrassed. you're not the first woman to try and pick me up this morning." Her: "(still giggling) how can you be so mean to a complete stranger?"

now i'm stuck i didnt have anything left to say so i just said "i dont know" and (luckily) she continued the conversation and i eventually got her email and number and everything. but if you could tell me something cocky and funny that I could have used to respond to that it would be much appreciated. thanks!

J. from OK


lol you get it all, and you're trying to tell me that you didn't know what to say in this situation?

How about this:

After she said, "How can you be so mean to a complete stranger?" you could have said:

"I'm not being mean at all, I'm just trying to let you know that it hurts my feelings when you treat me like a sex object like a piece of meat to be used for your entertainment can't youjust get to know me for who I am? And then later use all the makeup tricks to seduce me?"

There are all kinds of directions you could go with this you were doing great.

Just make sure you always end by turning it around, playing hard to get, and getting the email/number.

Try this:

"OK, look. You're nice and everything, but you're moving a little too fast for me. Here here's a pen. Write down your email address and number, and maybe we can talk on the phone later then we'll see."

Or if you want to get together right after you get off the plane, say:

"Hey, I'll tell you what. I see that you only want to use me for my charm but why don't we have a drink tonight so I can find out if there's more to you than just the makeup and cheap lines."

You're doing great.


hi david,

i don't know if my story fits in with your success story, but here it is for what it's worth. as a 50 year old dutchman, never been married..great.. and having lived in holland, the us, mexico, australia, most parts of asia and now the ast 6 months in china, i can say one thing, i totally agree with your cf concept and also that it is a proven international concept. even though i don't have your e-book i have been practising your cf concept all my life in countries where the chicks have different cultures and don't speak english. funny is'nt, yes, the answer is simple, don't be a WUSSY, girls are the same everywhere it's just the more you do cf the easier it gets! there is not a day or every couple of days that go by without a number to

contact some of these pretty things 18-25 year olds. sometimes i don't even have to ask, they give me their numbers to me, why because i am cf, rude, unpredictable, then smile, then rude again and say hey babe just because you give me your number does not mean we are getting layed tonight, i am too busy anyway, just give me your number and maybe i will call you in the next couple of days when i have time. in china it works slightly differently because of the language barrier, so I use body and sign language, think about that one and tend to pick the babes from the shops or hotels where they work(as it is easier to get them after work for some fun) same cf thing i tell them i'll be back in 2-3 days, very busy etc. then i drop in the nexy day or so for a quick hello and tell them again that i'll be back in 2-3 days, this keeps them curious and hungry. when i get back i pick them up near closing time, so i know I am set for the night. the only drawback! is that as i travel so much is that i stay mainly in hotels and so they are knocking on my door for more, often whilst i am busy with another chick, this creates great cf scenarios and the funny thing is they want me even more after that! so I am having great fun and i still don't know how manage to get some of my work done. so great work,david keep it up! cheers, s.


A 50 year old Dutchman that dates 18-25 year olds all over the world by being naturally Cocky Funny, huh?


Well thanks for your email, I love stories like yours. Stay in touch and share some of your techniques with us!

and if you're reading this right now and thinking to yourself, "You know, I need to learn this stuff about how to meet and attract women so I can get rid of that insecure and fearful feeling I have" then YOU'RE RIGHT!

I think that every man should invest in himself, and learn this skill.

Unfortunately, most guys never take the time and invest in themselves and they wind up going their whole lives WISHING that they could attract the kinds of women that they want.

Well, I used to be one of the guys who didn't know what he was doing with women. Now I'm one of the guys who can go out anytime, in any situation and attract women.

What's the difference?


And if you'd like to learn, then I recommend you learn the things that I learned FIRST.

It's taken me a long time to figure all this stuff out, and it's also taken a lot of time, effort, and energy on my part to put it all down on paper and on audio and video so that any guy can learn from the things I've discovered.

I'd like to personally invite you to check out my materials. In a matter of hours you can learn things that it took me YEARS to figure out all from the comfort and privacy of your own home.

If you haven't downloaded my online eBook "Double Your Dating", then you need to go and do that now. You can download it and be reading it in a few minutes from right now. It's here:

I'll talk to you again soon.

Your Friend,

David Deangelo

Suggested free e-books to read:

Dating Insider - Getting The First Date
Michael Hall - Getting The Edge In Business
David Deangelo - How To Get A Woman Phone Number And Email Address

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How To Deal With Nagging Spouse

How To Deal With Nagging Spouse Image
Nagging is irritating habit of a person to go on and on about a particular issue without giving themselves or others any rest. If you have a nagging wife or husband then you know exactly what I am talking about without any explanation. It is normal to feel that marriage problems arising out of nagging are minor but you are grossly mistaken. The Indian Penal Code was modified a couple of years back to include a clause that an married individual can seek divorce from a spouse who nags insistently and many people have got divorced under this law!

This habit is so irritating that even law recognises it has a legitimate reason for separation but unfortunately the people who nag have no clue as what they are doing. So if your spouse is one of those then here are a few tips to help you deal with them.

Tips To Deal With Nagging Spouse:

Some people nag about everything and others nag only about somethings. If your spouse is in the second category then you are lucky. Analyse what it is that makes your spouse nag.

Some women have a problem with husband's smoking. They are unable to stop him but the sight of the cigarette provokes them to become nagging wives. The best thing you can do is quit smoking and if you can't then you have to smoke where your wife can't see you.

Some husbands have a problematic tendency to nag about their wife's family and crib about their small failings. This is a dangerous habit. Quit it immediately or your marriage will end.

There are people who like to crib about everything be it financial problems, issues at work and even household work. Oh god, I have to clean the car. I hate my team at office. I can't cope with all this pressure of cooking and cleaning after work. The list is never ending.

For such people nagging is a habit. They will nag about anything and everything so you have to communicate with them. Let them know what they are doing is disturbing your mental peace. A matured discussion might just show them some light of reason.

If it does not work with reasoning then there is a more active way of dealing with the situation. Pay them back in their own coins. Nag them just like they nag you and it will drive them crazy in days. When they get mad at you, don't lose your cool. Tell them quietly that you have been taking this form of mental torture for much longer.

If your nagging wife or husband still does not understand then as a last resort to save your marriage you can try leaving the room whenever they start to nag. This is not the best option to solve your problem but what alternative do you have.

Try these marriage tips to see if you can sure your spouse of nagging because it a very serious problem.

Written by: Anwesha

Suggested free e-books to read:

Sean Stephenson - How Youth Can Succeed
Real Social Dynamics - How To Get Her Chasing You
Ron Louis - How To Succeed With Women

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