"Blonde guy in a black a jacket and jeans"
Where as a woman would describe him as
"Good looking in a metro sexual kind of way"
"Wearing a wine colored polo neck"
"He had a nicely cut jacket perhaps made of tweed and has buttoned down pockets"
"Fairly loose fitted dark denim jeans"
"Has dark blonde hair"
"Pointed shoes"
"He was around 24"
"Could be Scandinavian but if not is probably from New York"
"Probably has a girl friend, might be gay"
Get the picture? What I'm trying to say is this
Woman observe detail, men prefer to see the big picture. (Unless it's cars where men usually win hands down)
Men prefer to be factual; things are often black and white, good and bad, rich and poor.
Where as the average woman tends to see the individual stitches in life's rich tapestry,
For example if I ask a man about his friend, he will tend to say things such as "he's an outgoing guy", or he is "funny" or he's "confident". Where as woman, when asked about her girlfriends will usually give you her friends list of good points, her bad points, her relationship details and that's all before she has even started on the topic of discussing her friends sense of fashion.
Why is it like this? Who knows? But it is.So lets get on with the more important issue of how this piece of information can help you guys when it comes to..
ASSUMPTIONS
First of all assumptions are one of the 9 hook leads I teach in conversation skills, it is one of my favourites and its power should never be underestimated. But there is as with most the hook leads I teach a right way to do it and wrong way,
When guys make assumptions to woman they are usually a little vague, and might be seen as a fairly sweeping statement, where as a detailed assumption will produce better results (even if wrong!) This is the beauty of assumptions; the "wrong one" can be very playful if detailed!
EXAMPLE 1
A badly done assumption
"Where do you live?"
"Chelsea" (this is a very upmarket part of London where girls who live here tend to have a lot of money and a lot of time on their hands!)
"So you must like shopping"
Ok, lets break this down. He has made a vague assumption and to be honest, which girl does not like shopping? In her head she's thinking a few things.
"Yeah and..I like shopping bravo, you must be a psychic NOT!"
Also she thinking he has made little or not effort to get to know who she really is and that he probably says this to other girls all the time.
EXAMPLE 2
"Where do you live?"
"Chelsea"
"So you like shopping, but I bet although you like shopping you would never dream of going to those summer sales! All those people fighting over a Gucci bag is just not your style"
Or
"So you like shopping, but I reckon you're a careful shopper who knows they can shop at Tiffany's if they wanted but prefers to haggle in the markets, searching for a priceless bargain"
Now I have given these exact lines to students who really had impressive results, both assumptions are the complete opposite one happened to be fairly accurate with one girl and the other was totally wrong. But the girls both laughed, and responded well by explaing themselves and how they were "exactly" like that or how they were "not like that all"(giving valuable information to the guy about who they were, whilst he's just absorbing all these wonderful hooks they are giving him to work from"
You see, he tailor made the assumption for them, he spoke to them with detail and in doing this he made them feel like an individual, and in turn they will see him as an individual rather than just another guy making vague conversation in the hope that the conversation might turn interesting,
Another point I wish to make with detail in assumption or if you haven't noticed yet "detailed cold readings" is that guys also come across more confident and alpha, as they show they are not afraid to do this detailed cold reading and also do not mind having quite a lot of attention on them so early on in the interaction.
Attention to detail can be used also in other hook leads such as anecdotes and compliments.
Here are some other detailed assumptions:
"Whats your favourite film?"
"Dirty dancing"
"I bet your favourite scene is not the one most girl like, where he's dancing at the end with her I reckon, hmmm your favourite scene I the bit where etc etc"
"Where did you go on holiday"?
"Spain"
"I would say, judging by your tan you probably initially wanted to see the museums and shops but when you got there you thought, nah, I'll just lie on the beach all day and make my friends jealous when they see my tan
So remember, attention to detail will make her feel you see her as an individual and in turn make her see you as an individual.
See it through a woman's eyes next time round.
Suggested free e-books to read:
David Deangelo - Attraction And How To Create ItTony Horton - Nutrition Guide Daily Journal
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