Fantasy Girl By David Wygant

Fantasy Girl By David Wygant Image
Have you ever seen a woman when you're standing in a bar, or standing in Whole Foods, maybe you're at a coffee shop - it doesn't really matter where you are - but then your mind takes over - the fantasy part of your mind takes over and you start manufacturing an entire story about her? You start putting her up on this pedestal.

And women do the same exact thing: they will see a guy and they won't smile at him because they think, maybe he's the one! Oh man, I like him.

How do you like somebody that you've never spoken to before? That's the most ridiculous concept in the entire world, and it's something that everybody needs to get over. You like somebody? You like the way they look - let's break it down into what it really is.

You see someone that is physically appealing to you, so you look at them from across the room and the first thing that triggers in your mind - the only thing that should trigger in your mind - is that you like the way they look. That's it.

You don't like them; you don't even know what they're about. The woman or man that you're looking at could have a big huge piece of broccoli between their teeth, a booger hanging out of their nose, or breath that would absolutely rival your dog's on his worst day.

But yet you've built them up as this incredible fantasy before you even talk to them. You build them up as something - maybe they are the person that is going to rescue you from your single hell. You hope that this is the last person that you ever need to talk to again, because you are just so sick and tired of being single.

But the bottom line is that the stranger that you're looking at - is just that: a stranger, the physical image of who they are. It might as well be just a photograph. If you start manufacturing this entire fantasy about who they are, you're not even notice anything about what they might be doing.

You're not noticing what they are doing, you're not noticing their body language, and you're not noticing any emotions that may be on their face. You're noticing absolutely nothing. Nothing. Because you're lost in fantasyland, in la la land, and you're creating this whole fantasy.

So now everybody in fantasyland starts thinking about what to say. What do I say to this incredible person that I like and want to meet so badly? You don't like them! You like the way they look!

So what you need to do is realize that until you speak to a person, you have no idea what they are about. If you think about it - 90% of people that you spoke to in your life you had no chemistry with. That's right - nine out of ten people that you don't really have much chemistry with. And that's fine - at least you went over there and talked to them.

The only way to figure out if you like them is to go over and talk to them. Talk to them like they are a person - which is exactly what they are. Don't treat them any differently, talk to them exactly how they are.

Last night, we were in a bar and we were all out. I looked at my client and I said to him, "there's a woman, why don't you just go walk over and talk to her? Now?" he asked, and I responded, "no, why don't you wait until you get hammered and shitfaced drunk? And then, when she's sitting down at a table, you can beat yourself up because you didn't go talk to her all night long."

"Yes, NOW! But she's cute!" he said, and I responded, "it doesn't matter! Walk the hell over there and find out what she's all about!" And he did, and they talked for 20 minutes and had a great conversation. Do you know what he found out? That she was a nice woman.

That's what you need to do. If you see someone that you are attracted to, you don't like them. You just like the way that they look. They are physically appealing to your eyes, and that's about it.

So your mindset needs to be whatever it might be to get you to walk over there. You can use any type of mindset tricks. You can think to yourself, man, I'm going to go over there and talk to that person and see if they have as bad of breath as I think they do. Anything to get you laughing and smiling.

All you guys know the women masturbation fantasy, and if you haven't heard about it, I go into unbelievable detail in the Mastery Series, where I give you an exercise to picture a woman full-blown masturbating about you - then you'll have that devilish little smile when you approach her.

For all the women - you know exactly what I'm talking about - I give you the Scooby Doo fantasy - because men are just drippers and droolers and giant Scooby Doos - all of that is in my Women's Mastery Series.

I don't want to get into those visuals right now - if you haven't purchased the Mastery Series, I suggest that you do. At this point, it will really teach you how to understand the mindset of the opposite sex.

But let's go further into this right now: you don't know this person yet. Walk the hell over there and talk to them. Start a conversation, as I always talk about, based on observations and everything else.

You know what? You might find out that this dream person is actually the worst nightmare in the entire world. She might be whipping out pictures of her mother and her father and her three illegitimate children running around the hills of western Kentucky.

You don't know what the hell she's all about. So go talk to her, and stay out of fantasyland - stay in reality.

Suggested free e-books to read:

Alice Mabel Bacon - Japanese Girls And Women
C Kellogg - Facts By A Woman
Adam Gilad - Interview With David Wygant

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Valentine Day On A Budget

Valentine Day On A Budget Image
For a romantic Valentine's Day dinner on a budget, run, don't walk, to your nearest Target. This month's Dollar Spot section features an entire collection of Valentine's Day goodies to add romance to your day.

Here's a sampling of what they have available:

* Heart shaped ice cube trays
* Heart shaped cake pan
* Dinner plates with red and pink hearts on the rim
* Dessert plates with red and pink hearts on the rim
* Silverware with hearts on the handles
* Heart shaped candle holders
* Heart shaped lollipop molds
* Photo frames
* Mini Valentine's fondue set
* Heart shaped frying pan
* Cookie cutters
* Pot holders hand towels

Keep in mind that your Target may not have everything on this list, especially as Valentine's Day nears. At our Target, each item was priced at $2.50, but prices may vary.

Romantic Breakfast: Eggs and Pancakes

Start your day by surprising your sweetie with a romantic breakfast in bed. Fill a bed tray with a delicious breakfast, coffee, and a single red rose. If you want to get really romantic, add a card with a love note written inside.

Pancakes: Use the Valentine's Day cookie cutters to shape your pancakes. Included in the set are a heart with an error, a standard heart, an x and an o, and lips. Add some strawberry syrup on top.

Eggs: Use the heart shaped frying pan to make heart shaped fried eggs.

Add a meat of your choice to round it out. No shapes here.

Cost: $5 (frying pan, cookie cutters)

Romantic Dinner: Fondue

The key to any romantic dinner, especially a Valentine's dinner, is ambiance. Set the mood with a red tablecloth, the heart-themed dishes and silverware. and lots of candles. Soft romantic music playing in the background wouldn't hurt either.

For dinner, try a few delicious gourmet fondue recipes with the Valentine's mini fondue set. For dessert, you can do a decadent chocolate fondue and feed each other chocolate dipped berries. Add a glass of wine or a love-inducing cocktail and you've got a seductive dessert of aphrodisiacs.

Cost: $17.50 (2 dinner plates, 2 dessert plates, silverware set, candlesticks, fondue set)


Even if you've already got dinner reservations, these cool Valentine's goodies can still add romance to your day.

* Use the ice cube trays to add a little romance to your drinks throughout the day.
* Bake sugar cookies with the cookie cutters and top them with red icing.
* Make milk chocolate heart-shaped lollipops to share with a glass of wine.
* Give your sweetie the heart shaped photo frame with a photo of the two of you inside to put on their desk at work.

Suggested free e-books to read:

Michael Hall - Getting The Edge In Business
Shawn Nelson - The Untrained Men Guide

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Love Calculator Measure Your Love Compatibility

Love Calculator Measure Your Love Compatibility Image
A person who is in relationship always wants to know if his/her partner loves him/her truly or not. In current world where relationships are breaking frequently, people can do anything to know the result. After considering the requirement and demand of people, many companies and websites introduced love calculator. It is a electronic device or web application which enables male and female to see how compatible they are. Even, this application can help them to know how their names are compatible with each other. Now days, compatibility has emerged as the hot topic and people want to make sure before marriage whether their partners are compatible with them.

Many experts and love experts provide advice people not to take love calculator seriously. Believing on such type of things can ruin your life because these all applications work on particular software and you can not expect the true result. Still people trust on them and make them popular around the world. Yes, love calculator is not limited up to one or two countries. This device is popular around the world. Generally, people who recently have fallen in love use such type of calculators and devices.

Suggested free e-books to read:

Chris Jackson - Ultimate Ejaculation Mastery
Wayne Perkins - How To Hypnotize Your Lover
Harry Kitson - How To Use Your Mind

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Love Poems Ideal Way To Express Your Love

Love Poems Ideal Way To Express Your Love Image
Love is a most wonderful feeling on earth. You feel really excited and out of the world when you hear "YES" or "I DO" from your partner. Love poems play important role between the two lovers. These poems are nice way to express your feelings and love in front of your soul mate. It is not a new method through which you can win the heart of your beloved. Ancient literature also shows that this is very old method through which one lover tries to attract his/her partner.

There many poets around the world who got amazing popularity due to their best love poems. Few famous poets are Joyce Kilmer, Emily Watson, Emily Dickinson, Christopher Marlowe, Richard Hopper etc. These people touched the sky as far their success is concerned. Their writing skills about the love were amazing. Their love poems created fantastic atmosphere and helped lovers too. With the help of same poems, many lovers got opportunity to win the heart of their partner.

Even in current world, many people try to write love poems for their partner but it is not an easy task. It seems easy when you read it but it is not. If you are in true love with some one then nothing can stop you to write a fantastic poem.

Suggested free e-books to read:

Christopher Williamson - How To Improve Yourself
Tyler Durden - Responses To Leave Us Alone
Wayne Perkins - How To Hypnotize Your Lover

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I Love Hanukkah

I Love Hanukkah Image
If any of you watched the MTV movie awards this past Sunday you would have seen that Adam "The Sandman" Sandler won the Generation award this year, and even though Tom Cruise at times looked like a big fat idiot while announcing him, the clip of Adam's many infamous moments on television and film that followed sent me into a whirl wine of nostalgia and appreciation, for the comedic genius that is Adam Sandler. And then his acceptance speech, with him performing his own rendition of "Nobody Does it Better" by Carly Simon, was probably the funniest acceptance of an award I've EVER seen! Did anyone else catch that, it was pretty marvelous if you ask me!

Then last week as I was reading the MSN homepage as I often do when I'm at work, apparently someone else was as inspired by Adam's award winning night at the MTV awards, because they wrote an article entitled "Big Debate, is Sandler a genius or a jerk?" (See picture above) Well I am here to say....I think it's pretty obvious Adam Sandler is a Big Fat Genius! What was you disagree?..... well read and weep my friends, I've compiled a lengthy list of kick trash Adam Sandler Comedic moments, and if you aren't a believer now, then surely you will be converted to the Church of Sandler upon reading this post!

1.SNL skit: "LUNCH LADY LAND"- With a catchy run like "Hoagies and Grinders, Hoagies and Grinders, Navy Bean Navy Beans Navy Beans!" and "Sloppy Joes, Slop, Sloppy Joes Yeah!" It's a tune you'll never get out of your head, and then picturing Chris Farley leaping and bounding around as the hairy moled lunch funny!


I can't tell you how many times I had this trick pulled on me in Middle School, and while then it was slightly embarrassing, it is a classic line that I now believe never stops being funny!

3. Happy Gilmore:



4. SNL weekend update segment "RED HOODED SWEATSHIRT"- This is Adam's ode to his favorite article of clothing and is sung like a 50's doo wap song, it also features a cameo by Paul McCartney, this is one of my favorite Valentine's Day Jamz!


Adam didn't actually say this line, but I'm pretty sure he had something to do with it, it has his name all over it!

6. Happy Gilmore:


Happy- "What? Friends listen to Endless Love in the dark."

7. Billy Madison: "I can see your lips moving but I can't make out the words. I'm deaf. Oh Veronica Vaughn so hot want to touch the hiney. [Howls like a wolf]"

8. SNL Weekend Update CAJUN MAN - inebriation, hallucination, Lesbian,......are you hearing the accent in your head?

9.SNLWeekend Update OPERA MAN- While this is ninth on my list it has to be probably my most favorite character Adam did on Saturday Night Live, turning the news into an Opera.... AWESOME!

10.SNL Skit "Isn't that Crazy? Now Gimmie some Candy!"- This was a real winning segment for me when Adam was trying to give people ideas for Halloween costumes, by telling them to just use household items like A Newspaper and Be "Crazy News Paper Face" Or "Crazy Protractor Beard" or my personal favorite "Crazy Under the Desk Man" you can't tell me that's not funny!

11. SNL Skit CANTEEN BOY- Ok so all these SNL sketches hit me all at once, but all I have to say is Adam combined with Alec Baldwin is like comedy Magic!

12. SNL Commercial SCHMIDT'S GAY- Ok so call me crazy if you will, but I thought this Parodie of Beer advertisement's was sheer genius, and right on the money!

13. Billy Madison: "T-T-T-TODAY JUNIOR!"

You can't tell me you don't do this when someone stutters!

14. Big Daddy:




Sonny: ALLLRRIIIGGGHTT! God you were normal yesterday!

15. Wedding Singer:



As You all Know I love Jews therefore, I love Hanukkah, and as I result, I love Adam Sandler for writing a song about Hanukkah!

"Hanukkah makes me jump for Oi!"

17. Wedding Singer:

"Sir, one more outburst from you and I will strangle you with my microphone wire."


19.The Wedding Singer:



20. Billy Madison:


I could go on and on..... I don't know a soul alive since 1970 that hasn't at least quoted Adam Sandler at one time.... the man is BRILLIANT!, and just like most great minds he messes up and doesn't always bang out the hits, but when the good out weighs the bad you can make as many "Little Nicky's" as you want, you are still a bonified Legend in my book!

Here's to you Adam Sandler....thanks for making me laugh, even if I had to dumb myself down to do it!


Suggested free e-books to read:

Marshall Sylver - Hypnotic Selling Manual
David Kyle - Love Highway

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A Geeky Kind Of Love

A Geeky Kind Of Love Image
Now this is pretty cool. If you have a geek in your life, check out PC Mag's Top 10 geeky Valentine's gifts for under $50. They've got several things listed for both men and women including LED earrings and a retro watch. Our favorites? The heart-shaped mouse for her and the computing boxers for him. Nothing quite says love like sexy computer gear.

Suggested free e-books to read:

Don Miguel Ruiz - The Mastery Of Love
Emma Goldman - Marriage And Love

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Book Review The Perils Of Cyber Dating

Book Review The Perils Of Cyber Dating Cover

Julie Spiras The Perils of Cyber Dating By Julie Spira

Online dating has become the norm for many people seeking a soul mate. With full-time jobs and the like, it's hard to devote every weekend to finding the perfect person. That's why JULIE SPIRA wrote" Perils of Cyber "The book is so interesting you'll probably read" Perils of Cyber-"in one day. From the second I picked it up, I knew it was going to be an interesting read. I was sucked in right away - JULIE SPIRA has a way of describing her experiences that makes the reader feel like they were there with her, experiencing her feelings. You'll laugh at times and open your mouth in amazement at others.

Although JULIE SPIRA offers up a real-life guide to help others who want to get their feet wet in online dating via stories that might send others running in the other direction, her objective is to help readers hone their skills on the World Wide Web and come out unscathed.

Having experienced over 250 dates in almost 15 years, some marriage proposals and a divorce to boot, JULIE SPIRA takes readers on her journey, which started in the mid '90s.

From The Investment Banker to the Plastic Surgeon, JULIE SPIRA allows us to be that fly on the wall as she vividly describes her dating experiences. But that

is not all Julie Spira does; she also provides us with her "Rules of Netiquette."

Some of the Netiquette rules include:

THE GOOGLE RULE - Don't tell your date that you did a Google search before the first date - She was Googled by a date and learned more about herself than she even knew.

THE BODY PARTS RULE - Don't discuss body parts - one date went into great detail about a colonoscopy that he had while they were eating lunch.

So if you're a single looking for love online without much success, use JULIE SPIRA's" Perils of Cyber "as your guide to get over some of your worse dates and to look at online dating as an adventure, rather than yet another chore.

Highly recommended for both men and women.

To get the book, visit JULIE SPIRA at


Suggested free e-books to read:

John Alanis - Online Personals Copywriting
Elena Petrova - Scam Prevention Tips For Online Dating
Elena Petrova - The Golden Rules Of Online Dating

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An Intimate Evening Playlist

An Intimate Evening Playlist Cover
You know what isn't sexy? Silence. Ditto for the sound of pipes groaning or a nearby commuter train constantly rumbling by (if you're that unlucky). These lousy sound tracks can make taking a date home way more awkward than it needs to be. A nice alternative is some music. An even better alternative is some mood music expertly compiled into an intimate play list that just might get you some loving. Here are some track suggestions.


If the pulsing club beat of this Iio tune isn't enough to get you moving and grooving (off the dance floor, that is) the smooth vocals of this track spouting sweet romantic nothings should definitely put your sweetie in the mood.

Take, for instance, "The moment that we danced / Your arms felt like a cradle". How do you say no to that? What's great about this track is how it lets you re-create that club feel in the comfort of your pad or, more specifically, your bedroom.


Visually, Annie Lennox might be a tad creepy. On a vocal level, however, she emits a haunting seductive sound unequaled by any other female vocalist. While "Sweet Dreams" may be a little too heavy to serve as the auditory setting for intimacy, "This City Never Sleeps" (from the same album) should do the trick.

Much more laid-back and slower-paced than "Dreams", "This City Never Sleeps" feels like a late night walk down a darkened street in the middle of a big city - quiet, mysterious and just a little dangerous. Is there a better way to make your partner think you have the same qualities?


"All Mine" sort of sounds like the theme to a really surreal James Bond movie that was never made. Beneath the thunderous horn section and the this-close-to-being-creepy little girl-like vocals is a song about a deeply obsessive love, about a woman who wants her lover all for herself.

Even if you're not sure that the relationship will last forever, or that you feel as deeply connected to your partner as the persona does in this song, you will likely share that same possessive feeling of passion in the throws of that one romantic moment, making you feel that you could never ever let go of the person in your arms.


"Ocean Of Noise" sounds like it should be played over the climactic scene of a Richard Linklater film. Dabbling in much of the existential angst that permeates The Arcade Fire's second album Ocean Of Noise" may only vaguely allude to love and relationships, but the sheer melodic power of this song courtesy of lead singer Win Butler and co. feels like a sonic representation of the swelling in the chest one feels at the early stages of a romantic infatuation.

The sensation may be fleeting, but it's as powerful a sensation as you'll ever feel.

Suggested free e-books to read:

Ride The Punani - Tranceboys Guide To Getting Laid
George Anderson - Dynamite Mentalism

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Crush In High School And My Email Back

Crush In High School And My Email Back Image

I received this troubling email from a reader today:

I have a crush on this girl at my school. Once I told her that I have feelings for her, she immediately cut off all communication with me and to this day she refuses to speak with me at all(it's been a week), and their is no way in hell I am letting her go.

"My email back?"


That sounds a little harsh, but here is my reasoning for such an short answer: When you get "oneitis" you become less attractive when the girl doesn't reciprocate. This only damages yourself, feeding an addiction and fantasy that will most likely never come to pass, unless you DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT.

Countless emails have piled in my inbox sent by guys in a similar situation that have SINCE moved on and look back in retrospect and are AMAZED at how irrational and weak they were. These guys also tell me how they've dated numerous attractive girls AFTER GETTING THEIR GAME TOGETHER and feel great. Some have even bumped into their "oneitis" girl since. Often times, this girl is BLOWN AWAY at the new man they became.


Suggested free e-books to read:

Salad - Ericksonian Hypnosis Card Deck
Havelock Ellis - Studies In The Psychology Of Sex

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Getting That One Special Girl Part 2

Getting That One Special Girl Part 2 Image

If you currently find yourself in this situation, you have my heart-felt sympathies friend. This is no easy spot you find yourself in, and my plan is no guarantee for you to "get the girl".

In fact, everything I am about to tell you may seem completely counter-intuitive.

But, if you can do these few things, I assure you that you will regain your balance and POWER and see this much differently.

First of all, let's focus on this word "POWER" for a minute, OK?

If you are in a situation where the thoughts in your mind predominate around one area in your life (a girl, in this case) then that particular area has POWER over you.

Here's a bit of social/relationship math for you, OK?

* Too much power given to a woman PUSHES/REPELS her away from you
* Balanced power in all areas of life ATTRACTS the right women to you
* Too little power given to women ATTRACTS the wrong women to you

Interesting, isn't it.

Those three little statements I just made cost me 10 years of my life man.

I learned those the HARD way, but I am grateful to know this now and pass it along to you.

If you are a guy who is currently obsessed with a woman, here's my hunch - she's not really into you.

She might think you're nice, fun, cool, smart interesting. But, she doesn't find you attractive enough to form a relationship with you.

Women who are attracted to men, return their calls, they make time to see them, and they even initiate contact regularly.

If by chance she IS into you and just playing hard to get, pushing her is going to repel her away from you.

For now, here's what you've got to do:

1) STOP calling her (Now)

2) STOP stalking her (Now - cyber, in person, or otherwise)

3) ASAP - meet more women (approaches, parties, internet...all if possible)

4) In 10 days, INVITE "her" to do something with you and your friends

5) START using real social skills to attract her

The above structure is a way to turn "her" into a friend, and to do it FAST, OK?

It's a bit sneaky, I admit. But, if you're so obsessed with a girl that you can't sleep and if she's not giving you clear-cut signs that she wants to see you (like, returning your calls, calling you first, creating opportunities to see you, replying to your emails, spending time with you, kissing you, inviting you "upstairs" to meet her dog Maggie...etc) then you need to re-balance this relationship.

In fact, this is not really a relationship at all, is it?'s what I lovingly call a "situationship".

So, your first goal is to IMMEDIATELY re-balance this situationship.

The way to do that is to reclaim your power by STOPPING bad behavior.

Withdraw the excess of energy you are giving this, and stop calling/stalking/emailing her NOW.

Don't ever do this again, OK?

I know of a friend who changed all of his passwords and asked his mother to recreate them and keep them from him just so he couldn't cyber-stalk an ex-girlfriend.

You may not have to take such drastic measures - but do whatever it takes, because obsessive behavior and thinking around a woman 99.99% of the time insures that you WILL NOT GET HER.

Here's another point that I must make. Usually, we obsess over women who are subtly and indirectly communicating DISinterest to us.

Mixed signals are the cause of obsession and anxiety - lack of clarity is the issue here. If she was interested, you would know it.

She's just not that into other words. And if she is, by doing the 5 steps I outline above, you will reconnect with her in a healthy way.

If she isn' all means, CUT YOUR LOSSES, OK?

Our minds spin out of control and into obsessive and unhealthy behavior usually when the woman is unavailable.

In my case above, Ariella was giving me indirect signals that she was not available for what I wanted.

Because I was so emotionally wrapped up in it though, I was not able to see it.

Sure, it's easy to blame her for not being clear and direct, but MOST people handle things in this way.

In order to move past this, you have to OWN your end of it...which is that you didn't read some pretty obvious signals that she's not interested in you.

OK - so we're clear - STOP doing things that are hurting you and STOP RIGHT NOW.

Next, we've got to talk a little bit about a word that I am sure will connect with you.

This word changed my life, and that is not an over-hyped marketing statement either, that's the truth.

The word is:


If you are obsessed and consumed with ONE are living in a female scarce world, and you need to change that ASAP.

It is NORMAL for healthy men to want women (if you're heterosexual that is).

Your impulses towards intimacy, sex and relationship are healthy and right.

What you need is VARIETY - the "anti-scarcity".

Without some variety, you won't truly know and appreciate what is out there and may "settle" for a woman that is not truly right for you (if you are lucky).

Long-term, healthy relationships require experience. You've got to know the market, in other words, so that you make a healthy, informed choice.

See that?


If you're panicked and obsessed over "ONE", then you've lost your right to choose and that has to be fixed if you want a successful relationship.


Reminds me of one of my favorite movies. Ever see "Fandango"?

It's from the '80s and stars Kevin Costner and Judd Nelson - it's a great guy flick, and tells the story of a wild road trip taken by some friends right out of college.

Kevin Costner plays a swashbuckling sort of guy, who is a real ladies man.

Well, he's lamenting a past love with a buddy, and throws down this GEM of a phrase for us:

"The only way to get over a girl, is to go out and get yourself another one"

Makes sense, right? In our case, it makes a LOT of sense.

Guys who suffer from the scarcity mentality have to get their social lives up to speed and get more dates, and more options of women.

This may be the most important point I make in this report - if you want to cultivate true power with women and dating, you're going to need to meet MORE of them.

I'll get into this more a bit later, but just know that having more options/choices in your dating life is crucial. And that the next time you're in this pickle, you're going to want to meet some new women ASAP.

I'll cover the three ways to meet more women a bit later in this report though as it's a very involved topic, and I don't want to scatter our focus here, OK?

Now, you're going to need to give this some TIME.

TIME and PATIENCE are now your friends with "her".

I usually give it around 10 days, and I suggest only now communicating with her in mass emails - nothing direct or personal at this point. Otherwise, she seems too special.

Ever hear of this acronym - LJBF?


This is what you're doing with step #4. You are communicating to her that you've moved her into the "friend" column.

In about 10 days you'll want to organize something with your social circle. A great idea is to discover a cool brunch place, and set something up for Sunday at 1pm.

Brunch is so great because people are more likely to have plans in the evening than they are on a Sunday afternoon. So, this way you will get more "yes" replies.

On a Wednesday send a note to your "list" (with "her" in the cc category like the rest of your friends) inviting everyone to the brunch you're organizing.

Now, there is no guaranteeing that she will come along. But, if you continue to "lead" your social circle by organizing cool, interesting outings she will eventually come along.

Plus, now that she's your friend, you're allowed to treat her like you would any other friend. This is why it's fine to "cc" her on a mass email.

The ONLY time you have personal involvement with her right now is if she contacts/replies to you. And, even these communiques need to be quick and without fanfare, much like you would send to a friend.

This is how you reclaim your power here, and eliminate the "one-itis" you're currently experiencing.

Also, this plan rearranges your "situationship" with her so that she is still in your circle but so that YOU are now in charge (aka: having reclaimed your power).

This will also give the two of you a much less pressured way to get to know each other and see if you are really right for each other.

This is precisely why people tend to fall in love with others via their social circle. So, if you are in a "one-itis" situation, add her into your social circle so that the two of you can have a more balanced way to get to know each other.

Now, this doesn't guarantee that you'll "get the girl". This plan essentially presses the "reset" button with you and her which is you only shot at this point. For, if you are in an obsessed state, you are way past the point of "maybe".

The final piece to this is to attract her using GOOD social skills.

* You need to be the true LEADER of your social circle
* You need to flirt/tease with her in a way that doesn't embarrass her, but that does enhance sexual tension
* You need to bait her into chasing you
* You need to capture and lead her imagination by using storytelling
* You need to emphasize the strong connections that exist between you
* You need to present yourself with a "look" that is both contemporary and cool
* You need to understand what is naturally attractive to women, and what is not - then you need to start DOING and BEING attractive and stop DOING and BEING unattractive
* Ultimately, you need to meet more women as my hunch is that "she" is not the one for you...

Meeting more women, learning how to attract them, and living a life that naturally brings THE RIGHT women for relationships is THE teaching I convey in "How To Get A Girlfriend" and I think you owe it to yourself to check it out.

You can have it for free for 7 days even...


If you've read this article, then don't you think you owe it to yourself to focus a bit on this challenge called "WOMEN" and get it handled?

My opinion only: if you keep relying on just YOU and YOU alone to handle it, I bet your results don't change. You can't get out of the woods with the map that got you there in the first place.

The solution: some NEW information, which is precisely the purpose of my ebook.

So, I sure hope you got something out of these two posts here.

My goal with CEIC is to reduce your pain and help you improve and expand the pleasures of women in your life.

EVERY guy deserves healthy and pleasurable relationships with women, and eventually an awesome girlfriend.

If you're hung-up on one woman, and she isn't your girlfriend or wife, then it's time to assess the health of your dating and social life...

Is that time now?

I hope I've helped you with that today.

Over 'n out,

Stephen Nash

Suggested free e-books to read:

David Deangelo - Patty Interview Special Report
C Kellogg - Dating Tips For Men Special Report

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Blind Date Things To Take Care Of

Blind Date Things To Take Care Of Image
Blind Date is a new concept that is all about dating a stranger. A Blind date may end up in to a disaster or a pleasant meeting. It is always an adventurous activity. There are two types of blind dating. The first type is that you are completely in the dark about your date with no information what so ever. This can be really dangerous and disappointing if that person does not measure up to your expectations. Another type of blind date is the one in which you have little information about your partner that may be through e-mails, chats or phone calls.

There are certain things that must be kept in mind before going on the blind date, these are as follows:

* The locations should be decided very carefully. A public place is always the best choice, it can be a restaurant, a sea shore etc.
* Don't forget to carry cash and your credit cards.
* Don't forget your mobile phone as you can call anyone in case something unexpected happens at your date.
* Before leaving the home you need to make sure that you know your destination.
* One factor i.e. very important is the sense of humor. Do not forget to take it with you.
* Don't tell every thing about yourself as you do not know the other person very well.

Suggested free e-books to read:

Brian Caniglia - Online Dating Secrets
Ken Ward - Mind Change Techniques To Keep The Change

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Embrace The Unknown

Embrace The Unknown Image
There you are, alone at a bar waiting for your friends to arrive. You are standing at the bar only a few feet away from a woman who is also standing alone at the bar.

This woman is beautiful. She is everything you think you want.

You see her take a sip of her drink, play with the straw, look at her watch and check her cell phone. She looks around the room and, for just a split second, your eyes meet and you have a moment. Then she quickly looks down, and looks back at her phone again.

There you are, standing there alone at the bar with your hands in your pocket waiting for you friends. Apparently she is also waiting for her friends.

Your mind starts racing. You start thinking to yourself, "What can I say? What can I do?"

There are so many clues in this situation! She checked her watch. She checked her phone. Obviously she is waiting for her friends.

It is very easy to walk over there, look at her and say, "Obviously you are waiting for your friends. My friends are late too." You could start chatting with her.

The problem is that your mind starts messing with you. You don't see the obvious or, even if you did, you start to freak out the second she looks at you.

You start to ask all those questions in your head like "What can I say" and "How can I get this amazing woman's attention?" Listen, though, to what you are saying.

You already have her attention. She already looked over at you.

It is because you are afraid and overcomplicate things so much that you don't see the obvious signs in life. You don't even see the wonder of this moment. You don't even realize what a powerful moment this can be because you over-analyze things so much.

You have such a fear of embracing the unknown, that this is what is going to happen to you in this scenario: You are going to stay standing where you are and another guy is going to walk up and start talking to her.

Then her friends are going to arrive, and you are going to watch she and her friends get into a great conversation with him and his friends. When you go home, you are going to wonder what you could have done.

The truth is that you already know what you could have done. It is just your fear of the unknown that doesn't allow you to do it.

Every day you need to face the unknown. Every day you need to push yourself to do something of which you are afraid.

Otherwise, the unknown will continue to scare you and you will end up dating women who don't intrigue you and to whom you are not attracted. There is nothing worse than having sex with a woman who doesn't intrigue you.

You also don't want to ever end up in a relationship with a woman who doesn't intrigue you. Fear of the unknown is what drives us to loneliness.

Suggested free e-books to read:

William Cobbett - Advice To Young Men
John Burton - Worth Knowing
Ali Nomad - Sex The Unknown Quantity

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Why Do New Years Resolutions Fail

Why Do New Years Resolutions Fail Image
Ah - this is the time of the year again, when everybody becomes melancholic. Another year past. Time for a new resolution. But stop! Do you remember those resolutions from last year? Did you succeed? If not, read on. May be there is a way to succeed and 2006 will be the year when you follow through on your resolutions.

Statements abound about this day, the 31st of December: "Another year has past. Now it is already 2006/" (no, another couple of hours to go!). "I am getting older, wiser, more matured. Nothing has changed. I will always be the same. Will something ever change?"

Does this sound familiar to you? How come we carry those beliefs? How come some things never change? Oh - this is wrong. This change, but are you a part of it? This sounds better!

Let's see, where we can start?

Let's start with January 1st, 2005. Have you taken a look back at the beginning of 2005? With what kind of goals did you set out to "conquer" this year? Stop smoking? Lose weight? Change job? Fall in love? Get married? Get divorced? Get a better life?

How much have you achieved? How long did the resolution last? Till the end of January? February? When did you give up and why?

Oh, so many questions!

There is however, a way to make those solutions last. Really, believe me! It is easy to just say the sentence "I want to..." (fill in the blanks with whatever your goal is). Things then change already - a tiny little bit. Because, you create awareness in your mind that you want to change, but oh, oh, oh, old habits die hard.

So more is needed. Writing down the goal is another possibility. You need to know that problems cannot be solved, if there is no outcome!

Ah - there it is - your goal. Nicely written. But hey - write it in positive words, since the mind doesn't understand negatively formulated statements.

Don't write: "I want to lose weight" or "I want to stop smoking". Write, for example: "I want to live a healthier and happy life." This may sound funny, but is needed.

What else to do? Well, the easiest way to start is actually to start with the end in mind - sounds like Steven Covey and the 7 Habits, right?

And right he is. Start imagining, as vividly as possible, what will happen with your goal achieved. Really, as vividly as possible. Where do you want to be in the end of 2006, what you want to do, how you will look like with your goal in mind. In which environment do you operate, what behaviours will you exhibit. How you want to be like. See, what kind of capabilities you need to do so. Play a movie in your mind! What kind of person will you be, when you achieved the goal, what is the effect on you, your environment - yeah, think of this as well! If you want this promotion and you finally reached the goal, what will it do to your personal life, to your family? To you? Write it down, if you want. Your very own script!

Another very short example: You want to lose weight? See yourself in the slim body. Go into this body (associate with it - this is important!)! See yourself buying different type of clothes. Hear how people compliment you. Feel great inside. Wow, this can feel good, really.

Now, the harder part is coming. You need to work on the behaviour. Write down, what you need to do - going to the gym, eating lesser and so on. Write a program, month by month - milestones. Write a goal, for every month, how much you want to get your weight down. Don't forget to celebrate yourself - the rewards. What will you get, when you achieved or exceeded your milestones. Be aware that you won't always achieve them, because your body also need adjustment, your mind needs adjustment. That then is the time when you can get back to your script, to your written down goal as well - to reconfirm.

And while you write down those actionsteps, be as specific as possible. Yeah, I know, it is work, but hey - you want to change, right? Otherwise, you wouldn't have read so far down already?

Now, a tougher part. Everything we currently do is a habit, a program, running in our mind. So we eat too much because somehow, we have conditioned us to do so. Like, for example, cigarette smoking. You smoke, because.... you believe it looks cool, makes you confident, makes it easier to approach the opposite sex. Like that. You need to work on this. What else can you do to become more confident, instead of smoking? How else can you approach this beautiful girl over there? These are the substituting capabilities that are needed in order break this habit of smoking, eating and so on. Ask your friends, to help you. Check with your family, as support.

You will need them anyway, because along the year, there will be a time when you want to give up, when nothing moves in the direction, so then you need support (you can also send an e-mail to me, by the way, and we work on it!). And, again, read your script.

Are you ready to go for it? Really? Tell me about it, I would be honoured. Or, otherwise, I see you in December 2006.


(NLP in Asia)




personal change


Suggested free e-books to read:

Daniel Rose - The Sex Revolution Handbook
Amy Waterman - Your Guide To Stronger Relationships

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Herbal On The Disbelievers Of Pickup

Herbal On The Disbelievers Of Pickup Image
Here is a great post by Herbal (Tynan) on why alot of guys don't "get" pickup or more specifically the seduction community. If you haven't yet read Herbal's debut instructional manual Make Her Chase You, you should give it some time!

Mystery's show on VH1, The Pickup Artist, has gotten a lot of mainstream attention. As a result there are scores of people in that audience trying to wrap their minds around this whole "pick up thing".

I've read a few message boards where people are discussing the show, and almost universally trying to discredit the pick up. Why are people so against pickup? First instinct might be to assume that girls would be against it, but that guys would all be excited about it. Think about it - it promises to fulfill the #1 goal for nearly every man on the planet.

Here's what I think is happening.

There are two big categories of men who have problems with pickup. I'm going to talk first about the small group, and then about the bigger group.

The small group, which by definition are also an outspoken group, are the natural alpha-male types. They were discussing the show in the Tucker Max Forums, where a lot of these guys are. These are guys who have NEVER had problems with women. They naturally picked up enough attractive habits and qualities that they've never had long periods of time where they couldn't get girls. It's natural, and even correct, for them to hear about this stuff and say, "What kind of loser would need this? Getting girls is EASY. Why would you possible wear a stupid hat?"

While I don't necessary agree with their attitude, I don't have much of a problem with this group. Pickup isn't for them anyway. They already get it. Sure, we take their qualities, amplify it, and do it better than they do. We can appear natural if we want to, although going over the top is more effective. But the bottom line is that they're satisfied and don't need pickup to get girls. Fair enough.

The second group of haters are generally the worst section of society. I'm talking about the people who are so close minded that the solution to a problem can be thrust in front of their face and they'll look the other way. Unless an idea is force fed to them, foie gras style, they won't recognize it.

Pickup works. It's a fact that I've witnessed and lived. Done correctly, there is really no valid criticism against it. It is positive towards women. It is focused on self improvement. You don't become someone else, you become a better version of yourself. Pickup artists have gotten book deals, TV deals, and are collectively paid millions of dollars per year. Despite taking in the least attractive guys, we get very few complaints. Still, these people submit to their knee jerk reaction and believe, "Nope. That can't be real."

Most of the media caters to that very idea. Why? If the media became something that we had to THINK about, we'd be upset. As a society, we enjoy sitting in front of the idiot box and getting our beliefs fed to us. As long as the beliefs they feed aren't far away from what we already believe, we accept them as fact and move on. If they reported that pickup worked, every guy in America would have to think about his life and think about what it could be.

A friend of mine is the founder of one of the major pickup companies. He told me that a reporter came to do a story on him, but that it never got published. Why? The reporter later confessed to him that he was instructed to trash them, but refused to because he discovered that they were legit. His editor WOULDN'T ALLOW HIM to write positively about pickup.

I've found that the more I disregard public opinion and mainstream knowledge, the more success and happiness I've found. Following the mainstream is a great way to have a very average life.

The Neg

I've got to write about this too, because the neg is the most misunderstood and most often criticized piece of pickup strategy. This is ironic, but still not surprising, since the neg might take up 5 seconds AT MOST of the entire pickup process, which often lasts for hours.

The media, as well as detractors from pickup, like to call the neg an insult. That's not what it is. There was recently a study by scientists, which was covered by the Freakonomics Blog, that discusses people insulting their partners. Steven Levitt, the author, calls this negging. It's not.

Here's what negging is, plain and simple. When you approach a woman, you are implicitly putting her on a pedestal. You're saying, "Because you're so beautiful and I'm just some average guy, I will make the effort to come talk to you." The neg is a quick jab not intended to lower her self esteem, but rather intended to let her know that you are confident enough to be yourself around her.

A classic neg is pretending to pick a piece of lint off her sweater. Does that make her feel bad about herself? No. It just shows that she's NOT on a pedestal, and that you'll treat her like a normal human being. It remedies the awkward imbalance of social power that comes with any interaction where you approach her.

Suggested free e-books to read:

Robert Cialdini - Harnessing The Science Of Persuasion
Dating Insider - The Science Of Picking Up Women

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He Ll Hug The Girl

He Ll Hug The Girl Image
When men typically tackle a problem, in a very simplified model, they'll assess it, and take a strategic approach and solving the solution. This is where a lot of guys run into problems in the pick up community, is that they're too methodical about it. I remember a client last week asking me: "So, where in the m3 model, do I start implementing kino tactics". For a second there I paused and I was like "okay, stop right there".

In all fairness, I had the EXACT same approach when I first started the game. While Mystery has done a great job of breaking down the pickup process, I don't think that his model is all encompassing and applies to all situations. Just like in poker, while the game is inherently the same, there are so many different types of game styles: heads up, cash games, etc. There are so many ways to approach pickup as well: indirect, direct, what have you.

So while I give a lot of credit to Mystery for pioneering the indirect approach, I believe it to be toxic to have too much tunnel vision.

One of the "ah-ha" moments I had with regards to pickup in the early phases was when I was going out with a friend named Christian, and he would what we call "natural game", one of his first critiques to me was that I wasn't having any fun and that I was using wayyyyyyyy too much strategy.

Now, I'm not condoning getting drunk on a nightly basis, but for a week, I dropped everything, just went out as a normal guy and worked on being fun cool and social. My results were MUCH better.

Again, while I do credit Mystery's work a lot, I feel that a lot of men take everything in his book for gospel, there really needs to be a balance and more importantly, it's important to realize that much of the generic advice you got before the game still applies, such as being in the moment.

Okay, so at this point, I've probably left you a little confused, but don't sweat it, I think I have something that can help you curb your problems.

There are many models in pickup and just for intensive purposes we'll take the ABC's of Attraction and the Mystery Method.

Both models, while they are different on paper, are very similar in the steps and progression as they do follow the same principles.

The part where I'll see most guys screw up is getting to the D phase in the ABC's and the kino escalation with the Mystery Method.

The problem is that most guys will go into the interaction verbally and not convey and dominance nor will they implement any general kino tactics.

Back when I was first beginning to learn, I really found Lovedrop's lecture on Kino tactics to be extremely helpful. For the beginning to middle portion of the pickup, keeping things simple, all a PUA really needs to do well is apply general kino tactics and BT spikes ( buying temperature ). And really, if you can do these two things well, it'll take care of 80% of the pickup.

So for example, lovedrop will go into set and run the stripper name routine and when the girls respond with laughter, he'll kino escalate and it it's absolute clock work.

So for all the newbies out there, try not to overcomplicate things, instead, SIMPLIFY. For the time being, if you're just starting out, I would highly encourage you to keep things simple and use the basic template below:

* BT Spike

* Kino

* Continue conversation

If you can rinse and repeat that process, it'll set up a real solid foundation for the rest of the pick up. Again, just using some common sense and advice you received before you got into pickup, realize that humor is an absolute must for a PUA, if you can't make a girl laugh, there is no way in hell she'll be attracted to you and that especially applies to cold approach pickup in clubbing environments.

One of the best educational experiences I had in my PUA journey was working a bit with Joe D and he got my started with improv comedy. It really teaches you timing, tonality, and more importantly it teaches you how to think on your feet (ergo, you can ditch the canned material, and truly be in the moment). I spent a lot of time with this in unison with watching plenty of stand up comedy and over time I integrated this a lot into my personality.

Not only was it extremely helpful with my pickup life, but it truly added a new dimension of fun and happiness to my existence. Being able to create and share laughter with others is truly something you cannot put a price on.

Anyway, back to the pickup, when you can effectively BT spike, that gives you a lot of power and more importantly, it creates that small window for you to physically escalate.

So for those that have participated in VA bootcamp, you've seen Lovedrop demo his stripper name routine and right afterwards, he'll hug the girl and bite her softly on the neck and that conveys so many things. It conveys that he's playful, fun, dominant, and not hesitant of physically escalating.

So for those guys that are struggling out there and are having a tough time getting to the next level, hone your BT game, without it, you'll sink, trust me. Don't overcomplicate the entire pick up model, having solid BT game, IMO, is 50% of the work you'll do and if you watch all of the top PUA's in their infield videos, you'll notice it yourself.

Suggested free e-books to read:

David Deida - The Way Of The Superior Man
Dr Peter Davies - What Will The Neighbors

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