What I find with many clients that I work with is they will start at a really low place, but they will start to implement some of the philosophies that we teach as part of the DiCarlo Coaching program. They will start to feel a little bit of momentum. Maybe they'll be able to start to approach girls without any fear or hesitation. Then they might find that girls become more attracted and they start getting more confident. Maybe they'll have their first sexual experience in years, sometimes ever.
When that happens, ultimately they are now incorporating much better philosophies and they have a skill set that girls will find attractive. Girls will start to see them as an option to date. When guys get to that point they often find themselves in a complete predicament, because they like the girl, like the idea of being in a relationship, but also like the thought of exploring other possibilities.
Generally it's the reason why guys come to get coaching in the first place. But at the same time they are enjoying the process of this self-discovery and personal development and certainly enjoying the idea of multiple women seeing them as attractive.
Guys then feel like the weight of the world is crushing them, because they have to make it some way or the other. What I encourage guys in that situation to do is to just step back and recognize any decision you make doesn't have to be binding. You can make a decision and then three months down the track look to change that decision.
So if you decide to get yourself into an exclusive relationship and have one girlfriend, it's not necessarily permanent. If it's not working out for you, you can be honest, authentic and have that discussion with your girlfriend and tell her you need that little bit more space and you like the idea of continuing on this journey.
Likewise if you decide not being in a relationship is the right fit for you now, there's nothing saying it won't be the right fit for you in a later point in time. If you are honest with the person you were seeing you will be surprised how often they are open on continuing something on a more casual basis.
I think the right time to get into a relationship is a decision that ultimately every guy needs to make from his heart. It's not an intellectual decision. Go with your heart and get a sense of what feels right. When you make that decision, stick to it. In a month's time or a few weeks' time, go back and look at it.
Suggested free e-books to read:
Joseph Matthews - The Boyfriend Is Not An ObstacleChristian Godefroy - How To Change Your Shyness
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