Suggested free e-books to read:
Here's one of his earlier posts that are recommended advice for newbies (or even experienced PUAs) on eye contact.
> I've been reading the many helpful posts by all the experienced
players.
> I was wondering how the experts utilize eye contact. Do you guys when
> you first see a girl you like try to establish eye contact? What
> happens after you get eye contact? For some reason, when I make eye
> contact with a girl, I feel like I'm violting her in some sort of way.
> It's as if a girl can sense that I'm lusting after her with my eyes.
That's what you want her to sense.
I posted this once, and I will cut and paste it again...
Eye Contact Experiment
I asked one woman friend of mine "why did you go out with him?"
and she replied: "because when I looked at him he kept eye contact with
me."
When I recall the very successful people I have had the pleasure of working for in the
corporate world, I remember that they all maintained eye contact while speaking to me.
When you watch somebody successful being interviewed on TV, like Scott McNealy of
Sun, you notice that they never look away from their interviewer's eyes
and they rarely blink.
You are approaching a chick in the hall as you walk towards each other. When should
you look at her? (Her eyes, silly. If you look at anything else, it's over.) I have tried
all
combinations. If I wait until the last instant, I either find she is not looking, or, if
she is
looking, she quickly looks away. If I look at her and she looks at me and I look away,
then she never looks again. Then I tried something bold and decide I will look at her
eyes the entire time. To my amazement, she gazes like a deer into headlights. Never
breaks eye contact. So I decide to try this little experiment.
Recently I spent a week attending meetings in one of our buildings filled with educated
successful professional women in their 20's and 30's. Most are definitely doable. Some
are gorgeous. Some are married, some are not. I spent my time between meetings trying
this: I would pick a different floor and I would walk down each hall, walking just
slightly
to the right of center. When I saw a woman walking towards me, I maintained looking at
her eyes. Only the heavy ones did not keep looking. But for all the others, including the
gorgeous ones, they maintained eye contact the entire time. I never blinked. They never
blinked. They broke eye contact only when we were just about next to each other. I
broke eye contact only after she did. What really amazed me was that by the time we
passed, almost every chick had broken a smile. Some even said "Hi." I did not smile or
say Hi until they first did.
These halls were not long. Each woman was no farther than 30 feet away when I first
saw her. But what if it had been a very long hall? How far down the hall should I start
looking at her eyes? I certainly don't want to scare her. I look straight ahead, and then
when she is about 30 feet away, I start looking into her eyes.
I then went to the mall a few times to try the experiment there. Most did not look at all.
Of those who did look, most only looked for a second. Only about a third locked on. Of
those, about half broke a smile or said Hi. A couple of them where so moved that they
almost tripped.
Do you have to be walking? I tried the experiment while sitting. Almost none maintained
eye contact. Do they have to be walking? While I was walking I would look at any
chicks who were sitting. The results were the same as if we were both walking.
If I was approaching two chicks, and looked from one to the other, I lost them both. So,
if I am in such a situation, I lock onto one and I don't change my mind.
If I smiled or said Hi, while she was still looking at me, but before she smiled or said
Hi,
it would usually result in my loosing her. On rare instances did it make her smile and say
Hi with enthusiasm. So, I never smile or say Hi until she first does so, and I smile if
she
smiles and say Hi if she says Hi.
If she did not lock eye contact with me, I would go ahead and say Hi when she got close
to me. In many instances she would then enthusiastically turn to me and smile and say Hi.
I would also look at chicks who were with a man if he was not looking in my general
direction. I was surprised at the number of times that she would lock on and actually
smile.
I noticed that the better I dressed, or the sexier I dressed, the better I did. I noticed
that
the women who looked where better dressed then those who did not.
Eye contact in a bar is an entire science in itself. When done correctly, it can be
fucking lethal.
Real players never stare. They lock eye contact. There is a difference between
staring and locking eye contact. They are two totally different things.
When you look at a woman, here is what you do. Lock eye contact with her. Don't
blink. Don't look at her friend. Pick one eye and don't let go. You only get one chance
at this. Don't give up. Don't smile. Don't say anything. You are telling her that you are
interested in her and you are not intimidated by her. Then leave it up to her. You will be
amazed at the staring capability that women posses.
She is thinking "Who is this guy to be so bold as to continue looking at me while I look
at him? Now this is interesting. He is different." She knows that if she lets go now, she
will loose you. She will go one of two ways. If she wants to loose you, she will break
eye contact and look away. If she does not want to loose you, but is instead intrigued by
what you are doing, she knows that she has to eventually end the stare down and she
will have to make the move. She will have to either smile or say Hi.
If she smiles, you smile. If she says Hi, you say Hi. Don't say Hello. Then you reward
her and make your move.
Of course, you don't always have to wait for eye contact to make your move.
Credit - David Shade website
Derek Rake - Deadly Seduction Manuscript
David Deangelo - David Shade Interview Special Report
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Suggested free e-books to read:During the first half of this decade, New York Times and Rolling Stone journalist Neil Strauss courted infamy by co-writing and ghostwriting self-destruction memoirs for Jane’s Addiction and RHCP guitarist Dave Navarro, industrial metal bogeyman Marilyn Manson, modern porn icon Jenna Jameson and the baddest of hard rock’s bad boys, Motley Crue.
While documenting their exploits, he garnered his own notoriety as Style, a master pick-up artist. The memoir of that bizarre episode in his life, The Game: Penetrating the Secret Society of Pick-up Artists, was a sensation. He was envied by men, pilloried by women, some not even feeling the need to read the book before passing either judgment.
Also during this time, Strauss started seeing disaster at every turn. His neuroses manifested in an obsession with survivalism. From Y2K to 9/11 all the way up to Obama’s presidential victory, this newly repentant urbanite put himself into debt learning how to handle firearms, ride motorcycles, skin animals, build shelters, pick locks, and save lives. Preparing for the shit to really hit the fan, politically, economically and socially, Strauss learnt another thing – how to find peace in the inevitability of death.
The Enthusiast sat down with Strauss to discuss Emergency, the chilling, inspiring and hugely entertaining chronicle of his experiences. And, since our waiter conspiratorially whispered to Strauss, “Oh, I didn’t know you were in town,” as if he were Tyler Durden, we couldn’t help but discuss The Game.
The Enthusiast: So, after all this, are you a pessimist or a realist?
Neil Strauss: “First of all, all pessimists say they’re realists. Here’s the distinction: a guy named Lovedrop in The Game, one of the PUAs, said, ‘There are negativity avoiders and positivity embracers’. A positivity embracer is someone who walks around seeing the positive signs, everything’s rosy and the future’s going to be great. A positivity embracer writes a book thinking about the great reviews it’s going to get, how they’re going to be critically lauded and on all the talk shows. A negativity avoider writes a book saying ‘I hope nobody gives me a shitty review’. You’re still compelled to greatness but one is to avoid criticism and the other is to gain praise. I would fall into the negativity avoiders, because of the way I was raised.”
“I was born into a home where nothing was ever good enough. When the Marilyn Manson book hit the New York Times bestseller list I was like ‘Check it out, mum,’ and she says, ‘Well, that’s good but it doesn’t count unless it’s for two weeks.’ [Laughs] And when The Game made the bestseller list and I was excited that it was a book entirely by myself, she said, ‘Well, the Manson book was on for six weeks, so you gotta beat that.’”
Well, it’s obvious that both Emergency and The Game are driven by your insecurities.
“Totally. They’re really books about fear. One is fear of social and sexual humiliation and the other is fear of dying and fear of powerlessness due to economic and political forces you can’t control. And they’re solutions to that fear. Fear is usually due to ignorance, right? So getting knowledge, understanding and experience cures that. Therefore you’re no longer intimidated by social situations and the economic and political situations.”
It’s revealing to think someone learning how to fend for themself is so exceptional. Our generation doesn’t seem to have the physical capabilities, or the confidence in our capabilities, that previous generations have.
“That’s exactly why I did it. Because on the one hand it’s about disasters and terrorism but on the other hand it was just cool and grounding to know how to do these things: to walk outside and know what plants are edible, to know how to build a shelter, to find water, to know how to milk a goat and make some fuckin’ cheese [laughs]. This is what human beings did before we ended up learning how to write HTML code at 14 years old.”
So what is it about our generation not wanting to get our hands dirty?
“For me, it goes back to being a negativity avoider. One negative I want to avoid is death. My inspiration to learn and do all this shit is because I know I’m going to die [laughs]. Before I die I want to learn as much as I can.”
I almost welcome the apocalypse, because I’m curious to see how I’d handle it. Do you look forward to it?
“I’m at peace with death because I’ve done this stuff. In other words, if someone sprayed gunfire in here and we both got it in the head, my final thoughts would be, ‘Okay, that’s fine.’”
In both these books you emerge as some sort of uber-man. In The Game you became the ultimate pick-up artist and in Emergency you become a super survivalist. While writing, did you have to make efforts to humble yourself?
“I think it’s about being as honest as possible. Anyone who says, ‘I’m the king’, who is a total egomaniac, is obviously the most insecure person in the room. Why do you have to say that you’re better than anyone else? It’s not even logically rational. You’re saying it to compensate for your insecurities. So when I write something I’m trying to be as honest as possible. I’m not trying to purposefully humble myself, because embarrassing shit happens.”
But you should hugely proud of yourself.
“Not about urinating all over myself in a tent! [Laughs] Look, there are things people fantasise about; I’ve had some crazy post-Game experiences. To say exactly what would sound too much like bragging, but some of it was beyond what I thought was possible. And for most of it, the fantasy was greater than the reality. I also think with those who reach these achievements, who get really famous, it just magnifies what’s wrong with you. My interest wasn’t to be the best.”
“Both books never began as books. It’s not like I said to my publisher, ‘Let’s do a book on survivalism and a book on pick-up artists’. I started pursuing these things to make up for something lacking in my own life.”
All right, at what point did you know there was a story in all of these experiences?
“I can tell you the exact point in each book. In The Game it was when I was taking a road trip with Mystery to all these crazy places. It was during that road trip that I thought, ‘This guy’s crazy, this shit is getting out of hand.’ And finding that community was like finding an underground rock band that you want to share with everybody and you’ll know they’ll like it. With Emergency it was when I was with all the billionaires who were trying to escape the country. I thought, ‘This thing’s bigger than just my own weird ideas.”
In each book there’s a point where you indicate that you’re out of control. Are you excusing your actions?
“It’s possible to go into something too deep and lose perspective. Like every relationship that doesn’t work out. After you’ve gone in too deep and you step back, that’s when you have 20/20 hindsight.”
Taking notes at the time and writing them up afterwards gave you that perspective?
“I don’t really understand a book until after it’s done and I start doing interviews and I have to ask myself ‘What was that about?’ and try to explain it. Like when I told you that both books were about fear, I didn’t realise that when I was writing them, I just realised that afterwards.”
In part two of our interview with pick-up artist, rock’n'roll biographer and newly-minted survivalist Neil Strauss, we discuss his obsession with The Game of Love and The Game of Life, pandering to sleazebags, how to make a credit card into a knife, and how his new book Emergency has already saved lives. (Part one of the interview is here).
The events in Emergency and The Game happen concurrently with you writing The Dirt and the other biogs. Why isn’t there any crossover in either?
“There are teeny bits of overlap. You know that quote about ‘Life with the boring parts cut out’ or whatever it is? Obviously you cut out the boring parts. No one wants to read about me working 20 hours trying to finish a book on deadline. You just isolate parts of your life to what’s relevant to the story.”
So the survivalism obsession wasn’t as all-encompassing as it seems in the book?
“Oh, it was all-encompassing. As I was in Project Hollywood in The Game I started to get the idea that I wanted to get out. I didn’t have the idea for the book yet. But I would say definitely for the last year and a half it has been fully all-encompassing. There was so much knowledge I had to learn, condensed into such a short amount of time. Same with The Game, that was all-encompassing. I even left the New York Times while I was doing The Game.”
I thought you would be distancing yourself from The Game. You got a lot of stick for it.
“Yeah.”
You still stand by it?
“Most of the stick I get is from people who haven’t read it, because they think it’s some kind of lad’s manual.”
But you did do a manual, The Rules Of The Game.
“The Game was all the knowledge of everyone I’d met. Some I agreed with and some I didn’t. The Rules Of The Game is just what I thought worked. That way women can read it too and not be offended. I’m more interested in storytelling so I added the stories. I kinda have a rule with myself now: no more sequels.”
Where’s new material going to come from then? You were involved in The Game so heavily and survivalism so heavily…
“I actually have four more books under contract and I’ll probably write two of them before the end of the summer. One’s easy, it’s an anthology of stuff I’ve written for Rolling Stone and the New York Times. The other one, I had this idea for a book through my publishing company: no promotion, plain cover, just my name and the title. No illustrations. Something I just want to do for myself to get it out. After that I have two more books under contract [laughs].”
You talked about illustrations and Emergency has those instructional comics. Alongside a few little prose gimmicks and ‘This book will save your life’ coverline, I fear that you’re dumbing yourself down for your previous audience of sleazebags and rockdogs.
“I know what you’re saying. Here are two things: that ‘This book will save your life’ stuff? Obviously that’s just marketing. The cover is marketing, it’s not the book. The illustrations are another thing. First of all, I wanted to do some of the cool How-To stuff that didn’t fit into the book, just cool knowledge like how to pick a lock with a soda can, just cool subversive stuff in an Anarchist Cookbook sort of way.”
“To be honest, I never thought in a million zillion years that a publisher would ever let me print a book that showed someone how to turn a credit card into a knife. That I got that in the book, I was just waiting for the hammer to fall the whole time. When it was at the printers and gone, I’m like, ‘I can’t believe I got that in there.’ I thought they would freak out. I was actually going to put something in there about how to make a gun out of household items but the credit card is actually cooler.”
“The other reason is, it’s not like I’m trying to pander, I just get bored of myself. Like, 500 pages of yourself droning on and on? Sometimes your brain needs a break and so I put those [comics] in there. Same with the Jenna Jameson book, that’s a long freakin’ book for a porn star. Every now and then you just need a break from someone whining about their own life.”
Actually, you’re giving secrets away in both books. I mean, if you were trying to remain under the radar like you suggested in Emergency – not getting your fingerprints recorded and the like, although I know you give in towards the end – why is your address is in here about five times?
“I had someone change the numbers and information around, because another one of my paranoias extends to identity theft. The address goes to a PO Box, and the phone number I gave up and made into a voicemail.”
Why choose to do include them at all? For authenticity’s sake?
“Originally I blacked out certain information but it felt like I was holding something back. But here’s the main reason I put all the documents in there: for every book I’ve written, people ask one question. Like for the Dave Navarro book, people ask, ‘Is he still on drugs?’ For the Marilyn Manson book, ‘What’s he really like?’ And for The Game they all asked, ‘Did this really happen?’ I don’t want to get asked that again so I thought I’d provide evidence. Yes it’s friggin’ true because here’s my ID, here’s the napkin from the White House. And now no one’s asked me that question.”
You’re very willing to engage with your readers. There’s this weird cult around The Game and you stay in touch via a blog and mailing lists and whatnot. If Emergency also inspires people to try this stuff, you’re going to have another strange group surrounding you.
“Yeah, it’s weird. I’ve got emails from guys. As cheeky as the title may be, the book has actually saved people. Guys have taken CPR and first aid courses and one guy saved his mother’s life. He did CPR on her until the medics arrived.”
You’re saving lives, where previously you were ruining them!
[Laughs] “Exactly! Depends on the person, of course. Look, it’s not hardcore. I don’t think the world’s going to end. I don’t think an apocalypse is going to wipe us out or anything. It’s definitely scary that North Korea and Pakistan have nuclear weapons and the Taliban are making inroads there. There’s definitely some scary shit out there. But it’s far more likely for you to get in a car crash, or something like that. Not texting and driving is a good way not to die in a car crash. It’s amazing how often that happens.”
But you’re not preparing for accidents in Emergency; you’re preparing for disasters.
“But it’s as much about quelling anxiety as it is about preparing for disaster. It’s peace of mind, like insurance. As Spencer said in the book, about having health insurance and fire insurance, even though those things are unlikely, this is my insurance against the economy or politics or falling on the wrong side of the law.”
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To enjoy your dating, individual has to overcome shyness. Dating is all about fun, entertainment, enjoyment and confidence. Please keep in mind that girls or boys both want confident partner.
Please engage in conversation with your partner. If you are already with someone on date, then it is your duty and responsibility to entertain him/her. Your partner should not feel bore. Eye contact and body language plays quiet important role. Avoiding eye contact continuously shows your shyness and coward nature.
While dating with partners, people love to talk. Yes, conversation is a good medium to know someone. However, people forget about the quality and importance of listening skill. Please keep in mind that listening is more important then speaking. With the help of this technique, you can know your partner more and your partner will show more interest in you.
A date can be start with beautiful gift. Being a boy, you should present a gift to your girlfriend when you meet her first on date. This first step can help you to win the half battle. Usually, girls love flowers, chocolates and soft things. So, always buy suitable gift for her to start your date. As far as place is concerned, nothing can beat a nice coffee-house when it comes to first date. It also depends on the nature of your partner what kind of places he/she likes. Daring people love to spend time paying adventures games.
Interaction is also an important part of dating. When a person asks question about you or your date, you should try to understand his/her intension. You should answer of question accordingly. Never share your past with your partner while dating. In this world, every single person has one past. It does mean that you should tell everyone about it. Please keep in mind that few secrets are meant not to disclose. So, enjoy your date without any tension and get the perfect partner easily.
Suggested free e-books to read:
Oliver Turner - Daytime Pick Up RevealedGunwitch - Dynamic Sex Life
Scott Peck - Dating And Falling In Love
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Dating ideas help you to make your date comfortable and successful. Usually, success ratio of a date depends upon your preparation rather than what your partner thinks about you. It is always advisable to climb the ladder one by one instead of jumping on it. You should not forget that your partner is completely unknown for you and it is your responsibility to make him/her comfortable. Always choose a location where you both can talk nicely without any disturbance, but it doesn't mean to select a hotel room.
The best dating ideas are those things which can help you to get the best partner for you. You can choose restaurant, cinema hall, coffee shop, and exhibition for date. Delicious food and nice gift will always help you to win the battle of date.
Suggested free e-books to read:
Elena Petrova - The Golden Rules Of Online DatingElena Petrova - Scam Prevention Tips For Online Dating
David Deangelo - Double Your Dating Mastery With Women And Dating
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HOW TO ATTRACT GUYS
Most women I know who are super-hot have no problem trying to attract guys and get a boyfriend. In fact, they don't really try at all. They get dolled up, hang out and bam, before you know it, the predators are rolling up. For most of us though, we're not blessed with super natural looks, we're just average so if you're trying to attract guys it's different. The good news is that just because you are using different methods to attract guys and find love, the methods are actually better and are more likely to lead you to get a boyfriend who is more desireable than the predator stalking fake looking made up girls in the bar... Underneath all the superficial exterior, most beautiful girls I know have an incredibly hard time trying to find love and get a boyfriend they really like. I'll break this down real simple for you. If you want to really attract guys, invest in yourself. I don't mean cosmetics and wigs. I mean in improving your personality. Are you fun? Do you make guys smile? Are you always smiling? Are you approachable? Take a serious look at yourself and make sure you are smiling inside. If you can find love within yourself, you will have a much easier time to find love in others. Most guys are scared to approach women. One reason for this is so many women put up a wall so high it becomes impossible to attract guys because even if they like you they can't climb over the darn thing. Remember, you can't find love and get a boyfriend if you don't let guys talk to you. The wall starts with your face. SMILE! If a guy smiles at you, smile back. If you're out with your friends, relax, enjoy each other, and SMILE! If you put that smile on your face, I can personally guarantee that you will attract guys at a rate you never thought was possible and within no time, you will get a boyfriend.
Suggested free e-books to read:
Dr Barbara Keesling - How To Make Love All Night And Drive A Woman WildWayne Ross - Secrets To Attracting Beautiful Women
Robert Henderson - Secrets Of Dating Asian Women
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The Leonid meteor shower results from debris left behind by the comet Tempel-Tuttle, which orbits the sun every 33 years. The Earth passes through this debris in the opposite direction every November, which produces a spectacular show of meteors in hues of white. blue, aquamarine, and green, with the occasional possible fire burst. What is truly amazing is that the Earth is passing through debris laid down by the comet in the year 1466!
For a preview of what you can see, check out this Space.com video of the Leonids meteor shower from a previous year:
Be sure to take a warm blanket or sleeping bag to cuddle up in!
Check out our romantic stargazing guide for more tips, plus dates of annual meteor showers.
Suggested free e-books to read:
Michael Webb - 101 Romantic IdeasJohn Burton - Hypnotic Language And Its Power
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Soyeah, you're better off settling for the next best thing rather than holding out for the absolute best thing because:
YOURE CHANCES OF FINDING MR. RIGHT ARE 1 IN 285,000
Now that's just depressing, I agree. But hey, at least there are plenty of men out there that almost meet the criteria, right? Right?
So now, instead of sitting around pining over the one that got away or blaming yourself for being single, you can chalk it all down to mathematical statistics. It's not your fault. He's just not out there, and if he is, your chances of running into him are slim to none.
But then, maybe these stats are actually based on the fact that even the most perfect of men still requires a bit a tweaking for all of us.
Mr. Right seems to be nothing but a figment of our imaginations because let's face it; even the women who claim to have found the right guy have undergone some relationship surgery to hone it into what they want.
And if it wasn't him that they changed, then they certainly made some alterations to themselves.
Suggested free e-books to read:
William Robinson - Woman Her Sex And Love LifeMarsh - The Ten Pleasures Of Marriage
Ross Quigley - Beautiful Women Prefer Nerds
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USE INTERNET DATING - internet or online dating enables you to interact with number of people around the world. Once you start interacting with different kinds of persons, you feel more confident. It works like a ice breaker for you.
ACCEPTANCE - If someone commits mistake then there is no problem to admit it. Something happen with those people who are shy. It is mandatory to admit that you are shy and you should start working on such limitation or problem.
SPEND TIME OVER THE PHONE - Talk with girls over the phone more. She can be your sister, cousin or friend. With the help of this technique, you can increase you level of confidence very quickly.
EXPECT WORSE - Not all offers are accepted. It is important to be prepared for worst thing in life. Don't loose hope or confidence if a girl rejects you. Being a confident guy, you can ask the reason of rejection and try to remove those problems from your personality.
Suggested free e-books to read:
C Kellogg - Dating Tips For Men Special ReportC Kellogg - Top Dating Tips For Weary Singles
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A girl should be able to blow the mind of the guy she wants to date. Girls should use the charm and in depth knowledge to anticipate his needs. You should listen to the remarks he makes about his ex-girl friend so as to know what he didn't liked in her ex- girl friend. Avoid reacting with jealousy when he talks about his romantic past.
Enjoy his hobbies with him, so that he feels that you are truly interested in him. Try to find out his likes by talking to him. Allow him to teach you new things, this make him enjoy the time with you. Boost his confidence by giving him complements. Try to ask him for help and advice in any case, this will make him feel special. Try to look confident. Men usually like confident women. Let your man know that while you enjoy his hobbies, you have your on areas of interests as well.
All these tips can help you a lot if you want that a guy should like you.
Suggested free e-books to read:
Elena Petrova - Dating Advice For The Newly SingleMichael Webb - The Dating Wizard Secrets To Success With Women
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