The first step to becoming a natural (or as I would like to suggest natural as you can't change the fact that you had to learn this stuff) is to define what a natural is in respect to meeting and attracting woman.
So what is a natural?
IMO a natural is someone who has always gotten women. They may or may not be off a cold approach, but a natural has always had women in his life. A natural never had a problem getting a girlfriend or keeping her. A natural may or may not be great at cold approach. Most naturals I've met don't actually do cold approach. They approach the girls who are giving them eye contact or " approach invitations" if you're a nerd. Most naturals have very good beliefs about women's sex drive. They may be misogynistic, but they believe that women like sex. They don't place too much importance on women and when they get flaked on you never notice because they don't talk about it. When asked for advice they generally tell you to chill out or be cool.
Now that we know what a natural is, we have to define natural game.
IMO natural game is about a couple of things:
1. First understanding the way sex and relationships start. Well getting rid of the Internet and a celebrity that fucks his fans. Sex and relationships usually begin with a man meeting and then pursuing a woman until she relents. Relationships also usually start before sex does. Most people meet through work, or friends, or by happening to be in the same place at the same time with a common interest (think college class). It's still very rare that a woman meets a man at a club and they start dating. Generally people who do this are regarded as club friends. Clubs are seen as the domain of the hook up not the relationship.
So what are the elements we can agree upon about how sex and relationships start?
1. Guy meets girl (Or guy if you're into that sorta thing Cough*Masters*Cough)
2. Girl and guy become attracted to each other
3. Guy generally wants to get to sex as fast as possible
4. Couples have sex based on how long it takes the girl to get comfortable with having sex.
5. Based on how long it has been and what kind of frame has already been established couple begins a relationship, continues the relationship, or ends contact.
So you have to first be aware of what steps need to be taken in order to get a woman into you're bed and life
1. MEETING HER. There is a lot of work that goes into meeting women. This doesn't mean scouraging the clubs necessarily, it could also mean taking a class, going to a Starbucks, meeting friends of friends, using the Internet whatever.
2. GETTING HER ATTRACTED TO YOU
3. LETTING HER GET COMFORTABLE ENOUGH TO HAVE SEX
4. MANAGING THE RELATIONSHIP, SO THAT NEITHER OF YOU FEELS BAD ABOUT IT.
So now that we understand what we have to do, we can break it into tactics/techniques to accomplish these goals.
But naturals don't have techniques they just have goals and intents. They see a girl they want, they meet her, and they try to have sex with her. Either they fail (most of the time) or they succeed.
In my mind, that makes the key to becoming natural around women, is learning what to do (The process of getting sex) then unconsciously using the skills you've developed through repetition of techniques.
That's why routines are great, not because you should talk about things that are ungeniune forever, but because they teach you how to convey personality. But where most routine guys go wrong, is that they then don't develop a personality of their own. They stay conveying Mystery's personality or mine or Future's and they never seem to be able to get over the hump.
The routines are just vessels to convey that you are an alpha male character that she wants to be with. If you don't ever develop the actual traits, while you will be able to get attraction and some results, you will forever be looking through a glass ceiling.
So it is of utmost importance that we identify who we are. And who we want to be.
What kind of guy are you?
Goth?
Punk?
Jock?
Artistic?
A corporate mover and shaker?
What kind of guy do you want to be outside of your life with women? What do you want your tombstone to read?
Look deeply at these questions, answer them and then add universally attractive layers to your personality.
Learn to be fun and funny, learn to lead groups of people to believe in you, learn to make people feel good about themselves, learn to be strong, learn to be decisive, learn to help people help themselves, learn to teach people, learn how to make people feel safe and protected, learn to show people new sides of the world and themselves, learn to make people think, learn to see the good in everything and everyone, learn to show women what's awesome about your world etc.
I hope this isn't sounding like a rant, but I really want everyone to understand that ultimately becoming a natural isn't about changing who you are, it's about coming to accept who you are and getting others to accept who you are. People always talk about passion and how important it is. What is passion? It's someone embracing a quest or a journey that they believe in and embracing their dedication to it.
To become a natural you need a passion so that getting women isn't something you have a chance to learn about.
Suggested free e-books to read:
Theron Lalla - The Natural Pua BibleDan Bacon - Becoming A Man Who Naturally Attracts Women
Chris Jackson - Becoming A Master Of Oral Sex
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