Online dating reveals the most exquisite calibrations of the Flaw-O-Matic because the daters fill out questionnaires listing more attributes than could ever fit in a personal ad. They can spend all day finding minute faults in hundreds of potential partners. But that's also why so many people never make a lasting match.
"When you have all these criteria to consider, and so many people to choose from, you start striving for perfection," Dr. Ariely says. "You don't want to settle for someone who's not ideal in height, age, religion and 45 other dimensions."
It's the same problem afflicting New Yorkers: with so many prospects in the big city, they refuse to stop searching.
Customers of online dating services typically end up going out with fewer than 1 percent of the people whose profiles they study online. But something very different happens at a speed-dating event. The average participant makes a match with at least 1 in 10 of the people they meet; some studies have found the average is 2 or 3 out of 10. Women are still pickier than men, and in some speed-dating experiments they still prefer affluent, well-educated men, but the preference is less strong - and in some other studies they don't discriminate at all by income or social status.
Whole Article Here.
Here is another one of his article on analysis of speed dating and online dating, he is spot on.
Another researcher, Eli J. Finkel of Northwestern University, told me that one of the blog's readers, Joseph, nicely summarized the problems of online dating. Joseph explained that he'd given up on online dating because he found people started thinking they could place an order for a perfect partner:
But one of the major X-factors (including on more down-to-earth sites like Craigslist) seems to be the anonymity and fantasy that is part of our everyday virtual lives. Both parties in the dating exchange imagine and create alternative realities much more easily than a real-life introduction allows. It may rub avid on-line daters (and bloggers) the wrong way, but especially in the realm of romantic relationships the artifice of virtual communication probably raises more barriers than it breaks down.
Read the rest here.
My own experience of online is a mixed bag, i tend to do well online, but i don't like the amount of effort/time it requires and the amount of power of choice it gives to women, usually much more then to men. It is also very inconsistent so some weeks you might get back to back phone numbers and dates and then have drought of few weeks. Which is not a pleasant experience, so online should be used only as secondary additional way to meet, never as a primary one. Same goes for speed dating, it shouldn't be main way to meet, only as a secondary.Sign up for Pick up Future RSS feed.
Suggested free e-books to read:
John Overdurf - Training TrancesMichael Webb - Dating Exercises
Keywords: chinese dating advice swedish pick up lines advice for online dating mens body language article on body language reading body language of men negative body language
0 comments:
Post a Comment