What will goes on your mind when you acknowledge that you are in love with your friend. Is there some means comprise through which you can try to avoid or amend your connection which have been condemned as friendship. The only possible means to overcome from the situation is that rather than performing as a friend, start acting as an adorable lover.
It better that you may opt to be outspoken and clarify your feeling with that particular person other than thinking and delaying it. If you belief in acquiring some kinds of techniques like dating some other to make someone jealous or pressurizing them for a sexual approach using sort of hypnosis-style conversation or any thing else then may these compel them to focus that you are a person with physical needs.
Probably, the most horrible obsession for you might be at this position is to carry on being a friend rather than discomforting. You may be in a keen to cutoff yourself from your friend when he or she is not prepared to provide a romantic relationship with you. So therefore, it's better to leave it all and find someone else with whom you can share your happiness even if you are in love with your friend.
If you watched "MORE TO LOVE" on FOX last night, you'd know that 20 "rubenesque" women were vying for the attention of an equally thick man, in hopes that he would give them a "promise ring" by the time the hour was up.
"MORE TO LOVE", to put it mildly, was awful. It was sold to viewers as "the average woman is a size 14 - this is normal. Size 2 is not." Meanwhile, back at the ranch, all these plus-size women talked about was how they were too fat to be loved and what their favorite foods were.
Brought to us by the man who thought up "The Bachelor", MIKE FLEISS, I'm guessing that he received myriad applications from women who didn't fit the "size 4 and under" mold. Then he had the genius idea that these women could get their own show with a man of similar stature. We'll call the show "MORE TO LOVE" and we'll call big women "normal". Genius!
And the man who's at the center of attention, LUKE CONLEY, is obviously comfortable with his thickness, and plans to use "MORE TO LOVE" to get some serious as*. He made out with about half the women within an hour of meeting them and checked out every single one's butt as she walked into the cottage (I'm guessing the budget isn't big enough for a mansion).
The massive problem with "MORE TO LOVE" is that the women on the show are not confident or energetic; they all seem to be bitter and sad, and that just made the show that much harder to watch.
If this is America's attempt at making women feel better about being big, it failed big-time. It's obvious that each of them would trade places with a size 2 any day of the week.
If these women are so unhappy with their size, why don't they put some effort into eating healthier and exercising rather than exploiting themselves on a reality show that will do nothing for their self-confidence?
After all, a bunch of chicks will be getting rejected every week. How you like them apples?
I'm Nick Savoy, and I run Love Systems (formerly Mystery Method Corp) and if you feel a solid "pickup" slipping away, keep these three rules handy.
SECRET #1: BAIT, DON'T CHASE
When a woman seems to be slipping away, most guys (at least most guys who don't know Love Systems) will chase her harder. She didn't answer the last text? Call her! Phone calls are short? Ask her out!
It's logical, but counter-productive.
You want her to invest her time and emotional energy in you. But once you've asked her a couple of times, continuing to push the same offer on her will make her want it (and you) LESS.
It's the same with any kind of investment. Let's say your friend Joe wants you to invest in his new business. You keep dodging the question but Joe keeps asking or hinting at it. The more he does this, the more SURE you are that you don't want to invest. And after a while, you stop answering Joe's calls because you smell his agenda a mile away.
A BETTER WAY
What if Joe recognized that you didn't want to invest. Instead of pressuring you, he backed off, talked about other things, and only casually once in a while referred to his business but without asking you for anything. It sounds like it's doing well, and one day he invites you to drop by and visit.
Well, you can do that can't you? And if you liked what you saw, what's going to happen next? You'll probably ask HIM if he's interested in more investors. Just like a beautiful woman will often start hinting at date opportunities and places to meet up when you've got some emotional momentum going.
The first key is to LOWER THE INVESTMENT LEVEL YOU ARE ASKING OF HER. There are many ways to do this, depending on the situation, but here are some of the big ones:
* Texts instead of phone calls
* Light, fun conversation instead of serious topics
* Conversation for the sake of it alone instead of making plans
* Shorter rather than longer phone calls (and text messages)
In summary - take a step back, make sure she's with you, and then start going forward and building momentum again together.
SECRET #2: Be in the moment
Tell me if this story sounds familiar. You met a woman you're interested in. She is all over you, insists you take her number, promises to make you dinner this weekend and implies that she might be the desert
but it's not that same girl when (if?) you get her on the phone. She's actually busy this weekend and doesn't suggest another date.
Well, that's not fair, is it?
Darn right it isn't. Before I learned Love Systems and changed my life around, this used to get me so frustrated. Sometimes I'd even call the girl and ask what the heck happened. (There's no point doing that either.)
To explain what's going on and what to do, I'm going to take you on a little detour.
I love playing board games. It's a very nerdy hobby - I'm not talking about games people know, like Trivial Pursuit or Monopoly. I'm talking about games no one has heard of - detailed games re-fighting ancient wars, and so on.
(Obviously, this isn't something most women can relate to. But, it's my hobby and I'm passionate about it. Since women are attracted by emotion, not logic (you should know this), the average swimsuit model will genuinely prefer to hear me passionately talk about board games and why I love them more than Mr. Generic boring her droning on about his cars and money. Like Love Systems expert Mr. M wrote recently that she feels what you feel. I'll take passionate over bored any day.)
Anyway there's one game I used to play a lot called Diplomacy. It's a game of negotiation, betrayal, and intrigue, with a bit of military strategy thrown in. I used to be fairly good, but not great. At tournaments, I'd often get to the "final table" (the top seven players, since it's a seven-player game) and just as often be one of the first players eliminated.
Almost ten years ago, at the World Boardgaming Championships (yes, it does exist), I deliberately got a previous year's champion drunk so he'd tell me my flaw. See, one of the lessons I learned in school from a Goldman Sachs guest lecturer was "Alcohol Works." I stick with good advice wherever I find it.
My flaw? Not strategy. Not tactics. Not negotiation.
Optimistic self-delusion.
He told me he could pull the wool over my eyes by figuring out what it was that I wanted to believe, and then use that against me while he prepared to stab me in the back. If I was playing France and I really wanted to believe that my English ally wasn't about to attack me, then I'd believe just about any explanation the English player would give me Before he stuck the knife in.
"Play the board as it is, not how you want it to be."
Board games are silly, but the lesson isn't. It's funny how many times I've repeated that exact phrase without anyone asking where or what this "board" was about. But the meaning is clear, and very applicable to Love Systems.
The woman you want was all over you last night? That was last turn. Board's changed.
A woman is in your neighborhood and wants to come over tonight after being standoffish for weeks? Board's changed. Tomorrow she might not want to. You'll get nowhere by saying "but last night you wanted to," at least no further than I'd get in a Diplomacy game saying "but last turn you didn't have an army next to Paris."
SECRET #3: Know Your Moves
The great thing about Love Systems being "bottom up" - we start by figuring out what works and only THEN put theories and structure on top of it - is that literally every part of attracting beautiful women can be made easier.
So, even with something as specific as how to get a girl who has drifted way back in the orbit, there's a body of Love Systems knowledge. There are even a bunch of specific texts and things to say on the phone in the Phone and Text Game chapter of the Love Systems Routines Manual.
But I'll give you a classic one, right now, with my compliments:
"I just met your twin."
This works whether you haven't talked in months or whether you just want to spark some energy. It doesn't require major investment on her part. It implies that you are meeting other women and if some of them are similar to her and responding to you, maybe she should make her move now before you get away.
This is something impossible to say directly and difficult to convey which makes this such a powerful text.
It's a strange phenomenon, but women are more interested in you if they know that other women are interested in you too. We call this "Pre-selection" and it is one of the eight basic ways to attract beautiful women. This was first explained in my book, Magic Bullets (Magic Bullets Review), and then discussed in our Interview Series volumes INTRODUCTION TO ATTRACTION (Savoy and The Don), IDENTITY (Tenmagnet, Sinn, and Future), and FEMALE PSYCHOLOGY (Savoy and Soul).
Whether you already have a set of go-to moves that work all the time for you or whether you are using the phone and text game routines from Volume 2 of the Love Systems Routines Manual (Routines Manual Review), make sure you track your results!
The ideas and strategies that work - those are your moves. That's how you'll learn.
Many of the same things work for online flirting that work for “brick and mortar” flirting and all relationships begin with successful flirting. Flirting is an art that requires oozing confidence without being OTT. If you go too far, she will label you “slimy” If you don’t go far enough, she will label you “wimpy”. So how do you achieve that point half way between slimy and wimpy and do it online without using eye contact or body language? All you have is a computer an internet connection and membership in an online dating site, right?
- Send an email after you chat. This ranks right up there with sending a thank you note for a gift and it is vital to successful flirting.
- Ooze confidence. Successful flirts have a positive outlook on life. You need to transmit the “feel good” factor. An optimistic attitude attracts females like honey attracts flies.
- Listen...listen....listen. Pay attention to what she says and ask appropriate questions. Get her to open up and talk about herself. Make her feel like she is interesting and that you are interested in her. Works wonders!
- Compliment her...and do it often and sincerely. Nothing opens doors like making her feel good about herself. She will want to spend more time with you and if she pays you a compliment say “thank you”. Do Not be self depreciating.
- Have fun! Be light-hearted, funny and entertaining. Make her eager to talk to you again. Flirting is playful.
- Don’t be rude. Flirting does not include being sexually explicit nor taking offence if the lady isn’t responding to you. If she isn’t interested, take the hint and move on to the next prospect. If you get a lot of rejections, you should probably consider a different approach.
I. Respect. A relationship is about friendship, respect, and acceptance of one another. When there is lack of respect for the other trust and respect is replaced by suspicion and can slowly grow to hatred.
Good Signs:
- You take the time to listen and understand the other’s point opinion.
- You support and encourage each other’s individual interests and identity.
- You are aware of your partner’s faults and are able to accept some imperfections.
Warning Signs:
- You can’t forgive and/or forget each other’s mistakes.
- You are constantly struggling to live up to your partner's standards or the person you think your partner wants you to be.
- Your partner will not give you space to indulge in your interests and wants to spend every minute of the day with you.
- You criticize each other in front of others.
II. Communication. Being honest with each other in a relationship is very important and it is also important that you get to know the person properly before you commit yourself. How well do you know each other? Is the only talking you do bedroom talk?
Good Signs:
- You are open and honest with each other about your feelings.
- You can argue and come to some sort of compromise at the end of it.
- You talk openly about life issues such as finances, children, things that frighten you, and each other's ambitions in life.
Warning Signs:
- Neither of you is willing to forgive the other.
- You don’t discuss how you are feeling with each other and the frustration builds up in each of you, often causing you to resent each other.
- You only know his favorite color and what paper he reads. You are afraid to ask him in-depth questions about his life for fear of rejection or for fear of what you might find out.
III. Love. A long lasting relationship/marriage can rarely survive without love. So is it love or are you just kidding yourself?
Good Signs:
- You make sacrifices to make the other person happy.
- You are emotionally, physically, and mentally compatible.
- You are friends as well as lovers.
- You are truthful and honest and don’t keep secrets from one another.
- In a crisis you stand by each other no matter what the result.
Warning Signs:
- Your has been unfaithful on numerous occasions.
- Your partner has an eye for members of the opposite sex and has proved to be untrustworthy.
- There is little physical affection, laughter, or communication between the two of you.
- Your partner lies to you about where he/she has been and only confesses when you find out the truth.
- When the going gets tough, your partner gets going.
Don’t try to go too fast. Flirting is the first step to a successful relationship.
Change your beliefs and you change the very filters
with which you perceive and create your world!
“Beliefs are the determinant of what one experiences.
There are no external causes.”
- David Hawkins, I: Reality and Subjectivity
But, do you even know what your beliefs are?
Step one of your Belief Busting journey is to identify them.
So much of what you believe you are not even conscious of
and simply accept as 'the way life is'.
Yet the 'way life is' is a direct PRODUCT of these beliefs.
Most of your beliefs are formed during your childhood years,
yet they continue to impact your reality TODAY.
Beliefs don't fade with time. Quite the contrary. If you don't change them they are compounded by the very experiences they themselves generate in a detrimental catch 22.
You have a belief about EVERYTHING in your world!
And if you're experiencing limitation, struggle or hardship ANYWHERE, be that with relationships, money, your career, health, etc.,
you'll find an un-serving belief there to be cleared!
You CAN BREAK FREE!
The Belief Buster Kit shows you EXACTLY how to do this,
with over 20 exercises and techniques to identify and clear limiting beliefs
and create and install new empowering beliefs in their place.
It includes the Belief Buster Meditation
so you can implement these changes at a subconscious level.
It's time to get off the hamster wheel of your
past programs and experience the terrain
of your d****s come true
Whole new world's of possibility are available to you NOW!
Your heart's desires are quite literally A BELIEF AWAY!
(A cliche I know, but it's ABSOLUTELY true!)
You see the great news is...
You can CHOOSE what you believe!
Would you like to re-invent yourself and your world?
The Belief Buster Kit shows you how...
The Belief Buster Workbook:
Part 1 explores what beliefs are, how they are formed, and a consciousness recipe for the Belief Busting Process
Part 2 looks at how to identify the limiting beliefs that are holding you back in your life, and offers 11 specific exercises for doing so.
Part 3 looks at how you can harness your blockages (yes, that's right, your blockages) to identify limiting beliefs and patterns and turn enemies into allies.
Part 4 shows how to create and install new empowering beliefs that are aligned to your desires (including the Belief Buster Meditation)
Part 5 offers 9 techniques for strengthening your new beliefs in everyday life including a Daily Belief Program.
Part 6 gives life-changing consciousness raising tips for creating a PARADIGM SHIFT in your life.
Part 7 explores spiritual connection: you and your Higher Self, unlocking the treasure vault within you and the grace of co-creation.
PLUS you receive...
The Belief Buster Meditation:
This audio MP3 recording is a 20 minute guided visualization that takes you to the 'Chamber of Beliefs' within your subconscious mind where you can clear and replace your limiting beliefs with new empowering ones.
In the Belief Buster Meditation you also release the emotional energy that surrounds and compounds your limiting belief and anchor in your new belief with a corresponding positive emotional resonance.
This powerful meditation enables you to move beyond theory and implement the necessary changes at a subconscious level.
Have you been communicating with someone via an online dating site and want to meet in person? Well, there's a new reality show that is casting men and women who are interested in meeting an online love interest via their show.
Your chance to submit yourself only lasts until February 2, 2010, so if you want to meet someone you met on an online dating site, but who lives too far away, or whom you simply want to meet while the cameras are rolling, this might be the perfect opportunity for you.
So whether you're not hooking up with your online love interest due to proximity, money or "just because", now you have the opportunity to not only meet them, but you can show the whole world that it's possible to find the one you want via online dating. And perhaps get those 15 minutes everyone covets so much.
Friendships and connections are a necessity in life. We need them for our health and even our survival. It's important to recognize that whatever we put out into the world, we will also receive. Furthermore, I've learned that if you know how to be a good friend, and practice that in your everyday life, you will be able to create friendships with not only other women, but other people in general.
I know quite a few women with great female friendships and I know quite a few women who have had no-so-great experiences when trying to befriend other women. And what I can say is this, the keys to establishing a great female friendship are 1) being a great friend yourself and 2) being able to spot the signs of "female friend potential." This means you need to be able to model certain qualities and look for certain qualities and attributes in your friends. Maybe you don't know what qualities to look for, maybe you're having doubts about a current friendship, or maybe you're interested in whether "you're" even being a good friend yourself.
Through experience I've learned a few valuable lessons about choosing female friends, as well as how to be a good friend myself. What are these lessons? Take a read and let me know if you agree. Here's what I've learned about choosing female friends:
1. TO AVOID GOSSIP-QUEENS
Gossip is a big issue among women. Women talk- sometimes more than we should. Men constantly joke about the gossipy nature of women. Yes, the behavior can be funny. But it can also be destructive. As "harmless" as gossiping can "appear", the harsh reality is this: habitual gossipers are insecure people who try to mask their inadequacies by fixating on the lives of others. And while many women will entertain gossip from time to time, nobody really trusts or really wants to be friends with a gossiper. I've learned that people (not just women) may "act" like they're cool with a gossiper, but they will never trust or take a friendship with a gossiper seriously. And rightfully so! I've learned to avoid women who gossip, and turn down invitations to gossip. Doing this has enabled me to recognize true friends and have more meaningful female friendships.
2. TO BEFRIEND WOMEN WHO RESPECT AND VALUE INDEPENDENCE
It's important to have friends that respect and value your independence. I've observed friendships and had former "friends" who wanted to behave like puppet-masters or put ridiculous conditions on the friendship like, "I don't like Nicole, and if you were my friend you wouldn't talk to her either." Maybe in grade school, this type of behavior would be understandable. But it has no place among grown women. A real friend values your independence and ability to make decisions on your own. And I've learned that if a woman ever makes you feel like you can't think for yourself or make your own decisions without her feeling "hurt" or "betrayed", then she's not really your friend at all.
3. TO BEFRIEND WOMEN WHO ARE THERE IN THE GOOD TIMES- AND THE BAD TIMES
I once went through a pretty bad breakup. I was an absolute emotional wreck and wanted to be alone so I could cry and sulk- but my girlfriend refused. I tried to act tough, like everything was fine, but she insisted that I crash at her place for the weekend. So for two days, I camped out at her place while she made my meals and entertained me with movies and games. At one point, the pain of my breakup resurfaced and I began to cry. What did my girlfriend do? She gave me a huge hug, some Kleenex, a pep talk, and even played therapist- which is pretty funny now considering that I'm the doctor. For two days, my friend took time out of her life to be there for me in my time of crisis. And I've never forgotten that kind gesture. My friend is a shining example of what it means to be a great friend and I'm lucky to have her in my life.
4. TO BEFRIEND WOMEN WHO HANDLE CONFLICT MATURELY
I've learned that a great friend knows how to resolve conflict in a mature manner. Furthermore, a great friend is someone who will not keep adding fuel to the fire when any type of conflict arises that may compromise the friendship. Disagreements and debate are just a normal part of friendship- but pettiness, disrespect and spitefulness are not. Watch how your friend (or potential friend) handles conflict. Are they a peacemaker or are they a fire-starter? The way they handle conflict will clue you into their level of maturity and their worth as a friend.
WHAT TO DO WHEN YOUR FRIEND'S BEHAVIOR IS QUESTIONABLE
I love this quote by Bob Marley because it best sums up how you should approach friendships:
"THE TRUTH IS, EVERYONE IS GOING TO HURT YOU"." YOU JUST GOT TO FIND THE ONES WORTH SUFFERING FOR."
If you want to have healthy friendships with other women, "and other people in general", you're going to have to learn to expect flaws and disappointment from time to time. I'm not saying to be a pushover and accept disrespect under any circumstance. What I am saying is to recognize that no friendship is "perfect." So if and when conflict occurs, you should take the time to LOGICALLY weigh the good against the bad. If there's more good, do your part to address any issues and maintain the friendship. If there's more bad, cut her loose and keep it moving. In the end, your goal is to have a GREAT AND LIFE-LONG FRIENDSHIP. And the best way to do this is by making SMART decisions in who you choose as friends.
DO YOU HAVE GREAT FEMALE FRIENDSHIPS? WHAT IS THE KEY TO FORMING AND MAINTAINING HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS WITH OTHER WOMEN?
Dating doesn't contain any hard and fast rule to get success. But after following few dating ideas, you can increase the chances of success.
Restaurant - Restaurant is the best place from where you can start your date nicely. Always make sure to take your date to nice place where he/she can feel comfortable and enjoy a lot. Delicious food can work as cherry on the cake.
Digital camera - Never forget to bring a camera on a date. A nice camera can show your seriousness towards the relationship. It always helps to save the nice moment with your soul mate.
Museum or garden - Museum or garden can be other nice dating ideas. Most of the people love to spend time alone with their soul mates, and nothing can beat a nice museum or garden.
Gift- Never forgets to take a gift for your partner. A nice gift always show how much you care can for him/her. Always present the gift at the end of the dating. It helps to save some nice memory, even after finishing the date.
Cake - If it is your first date, then nothing can beat a nice chocolate cake. A sweet cake can help to make a good start.
Men have been trying to figure women out forever. There have been countless books written on the subject over the years, and many of them seemed to work. This is hude catalog, download them, buy them, test them and post the results in comments...
