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Connect The Dates

Connect The Dates Cover

Attracting Opposites and Feeling Connected

Dear Aaron and Amy,

I have been casually dating for a while now but I never really connect deeply with anyone I meet. I am careful to choose people with similar interests and I try to avoid dating a "type." But still, I have no luck. I am thinking, maybe opposites really do attract. But how do I date someone who is my opposite? Where would I meet him? How do we begin to share a relationship if we have nothing in common?

CURIOUS


Dear Curious,

Opposites attract the same way everyone else does: they want to have sex. A relationship with someone like minded or otherwise in which you do not want to have sex is called a friendship. Meeting people is gigantically easy these days; really it's so easy it almost feels like cheating. I can't imagine what neanderthal, pre-internet people did to meet each other, but it certainly wasn't as easy for them as it is for you. Chat rooms, dating websites, facebook or even chatroulette (if you're a pervert, psychopath or pedophile) all exist to provide you access to millions of other similarly hopeless and lonely individuals that populate every nook and cranny of wherever you live, unless it's the moon.

If you're not an internet type, which you are even if you don't think you are because this is an internet site, then what you need to do is not be afraid to meet people and be rejected. Bars exist and contain people who want relationships, (or "relationships") all over the place, but is a bit of a craps shoot. Speed dating takes place virtually everywhere and is both brilliant and pathetic, so be prepared to wade through some of the lower ranks of society if you take that route. Remember though, gold nuggets were sifted from muddy streams before technology came along and gave us Wal*mart and took our souls.

Yours,

AARON


Dear Curious,

Aaron has many very deep and emotional relationships I agree with him though that opposites totally attract. They attract for sex, they attract because it is fun to interact with someone who is different, they attract because it is great to attract and be attractive. Your problem though, is that you want a deep relationship. I'm guessing you are just not being patient enough. Connections take time and experiences to develop.

If I may quote Tom Robbins, a writer who spends significant amounts of time loving, thinking about loving, and then writing about loving:

"We waste time looking for the perfect lover, instead of creating the perfect love."

In a world of such diversity, who knows what is the perfect match for you. Probably the person with whom you spend the most time making a connection.Good Luck,

AMY



Suggested free e-books to read:

Dating Insider - Getting The First Date
Brian Caniglia - Online Dating Secrets
Avishai Fuksman - The Date Saver

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How To Handle A Bigger Social Life

How To Handle A Bigger Social Life Image
 This was an interesting article by Carlos Xuma about getting control with your social circle.

QUESTION


I've noticed recently that my cocky and funny and confidence from reading your stuff has given me a good amount of popularity among people in my college. Not just with girls, but male friends as well.

Within the past few months I have got A LOT of new friends added to my phone and people often rely on me to plan and organize social events and little group gatherings.

The problem is, there are so many people who want to hang out with me its hard for me to find time for them or plan things with any of the few groups I hang out with.

I know this question doesn't have a lot to do with dating. But more towards the social life of an Alpha man.

How do I keep track of all these people? Its starting to get confusing for me

CARLOS XUMA ANSWERS


It feels GOOD, doesn't it?

A sudden increase in your social network?

Being in demand for once instead of IGNORED


And no matter what we may think about popularity, and how we turn our noses at it, it sure does feel GOOD, doesn't it?

I used to be a real loner. I remember this time in high school when I got a school jacket with our school colors and everything.

Now, I was a poor kid, and I couldn't afford to buy one, but apparently they accidentally gave it to me thinking that I'd ordered it. The jacket fit really nice, too.

I wore that jacket around and felt proud. I felt like I finally BELONGED. For once I wasn't awkward or weird or different than the others around me. I lost my teenage maladjustment for just a week or so. I got along with people better and I felt more social.

And then they found me out. The teachers realized I didn't buy the jacket, so I had to give it back because I couldn't afford it.

After I got over my initial disappointment, I thought that I had just been ACTING confident and feeling socially valuable that whole time I had the jacket.

And now I was going back to my old self again.

But the reality was that my old self was the ACT.

And the other part of my new reality was that nothing changed about ME, just my thoughts.

The jacket didn't give me anything. I just acted on a BELIEF.

It was my own insecurities and beliefs about my place in the school pecking order.

For two weeks I was part of the "in crowd" and confident all because of a stupid high school jacket.

Funny, huh?

Now, it took me years to get over those feelings of inferiority and insecurity, but I did. And when I did, and I discovered that I could have as many friends as I wanted, I started to respond to this sudden social wealth in my life by wanting to be a part of it all. I did my best to make sure no one slipped through the cracks.

Some did, but the ones who lasted were the ones I counted as friends.

Now, you gotta admit - this is a pretty good problem to have, isn't it?

Tons of friends and an active social life. (A lot of stuff you learned from me, but most of it was already inside YOU, my Jedi pupil)

Well, guess what? You don't have to keep track of everyone and everything and keep it all organized. You can just go along for the ride.

Most guys WISH they had this problem in their lives, so I'm sure I'll get emails about how all the readers want to start a charity in your name.

Uh, yeah, sure.

Anyway


Here's an idea or two for your social logistic problem - get an iPhone, or some other kind of PDA. Keep all your contacts and numbers in there. Or just a good cell phone that can keep all the information straight.

Then create an email group with all their emails in it. Then you just send out a blast to them every so often with ideas on where to meet that weekend for a "flash-mob."

You can even setup a text message group on your phone that you can blast on a moment's notice.

"Over at Harry's Pub Come over for pitchers and darts"

Create a regular place to meet up on certain days so that everyone gets that feeling of camaraderie and community. Like the bar in "Cheers."

Then put together a few parties and events and make sure EVERYONE is invited. Enjoy your newfound social network.

Here's a little marketing tip that will blow your social network up as large as you want it:

Take a lot of fun pictures at your events, and put them up on a myspace or facebook page. Make sure everyone is having fun, and then you'll become a social legend that everyone will want to meet.

And you'll get a lot more new friends from the friends that your current friends bring along. I have some friends that hold these kinds of bring-a-friend or "date my friend" parties regularly.

Just be sure to delegate some of the organization to your more reliable and trusted friends. You don't want to have to do all the work.

And you can even have a party where everyone has to bring a single friend of the opposite sex.

You'll create a wider social circle


You'll have more women in your life (Which is the usual side-effect of a healthier social life)

And then all your free time gets used up because you're now socially VALUABLE. This is what we call a "high-quality problem."

Don't bitch about it Ride the wave!

Because this is an Alpha Man's strongest skill: POWER Social Skills.

He knows that it's not the anti-social jerk that gets to have all the fun (and the women) in life, but the guy who's calm and confident in his own skin, and can still be liked by others.

Improve your dating and social life. Make the changes you need to make to get the McLovin, the bedroom action, and relationships that you want and DESERVE to have.

You need to learn these Power Social Skills, and what it means to be a complete man today.

I've been interviewing women in this field lately - the smart ones who really DO know what women want - and every one of them is absolutely aligned on this fact:

WOMEN WANT A MAN WHO IS NOT FOCUSED ONLY ON WOMEN.

He has to have his complete game together, and that means having the one ability that most guys don't take the time to develop

And they don't develop it simply because they never had anyone teach it to them.

Well that's going to change


Go have a look at the new social revolution that I'm starting with guys right now.

So that you can have the kind of life that YOU choose to lead, with the success that most guys thought you had to inherit or get through luck

I'll be back again soon to teach you more about Power Social Skills

Your Friend,

Carlos Xuma



Suggested free e-books to read:

Fj Shark - How To Be The Jerk Women Love
Stylelife Academy - How To Work The Personals

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Hmm

Hmm Image
I don't ususally post horoscopes ("although I will confess to reading mine daily (I have it e-mailed to me--oh, be quiet) because it's usually so out there it gives me a giggle"), but I rather loved the top half of todays predictions ("yes", "very much so"), so I thought I'd share.

May 4th 2006


Some unexpected but welcome communications could come your way, [..."my name deleted to protect the innocent..."], through fax, email, cell phone, or other tools of recent technology - probably from either a lover or a close friend. Planning for a pleasant and exciting journey by air is indicated. Today, you relate well to others; friendships grow closer, romantic relationships more intimate. Someone close to you could even move into your neighborhood. Tonight: Plan a small gathering. You'll enjoy it!

Suggested free e-books to read:

In10se - Game
Geoffrey Miller - The Mating Mind


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Book Review How To Be A Super Hot Woman

Book Review How To Be A Super Hot Woman Cover
By Mandy Simons the advice given also makes one shake their head in wonderment. I'm guessing this book was self-published because no self-respecting publishing company would ever give this book that go-ahead.

The ladies provide gems that suggest that women buy fake name brand purses off the net, and to walk to the middle of a room at a party and wait for someone to come and take your coat. I think these ladies may have been guzzling whisky and watching old movies when they threw this thing they call a dating advice book together.

The contents of the book range from complete logic (you have to be clean and take showers if you want to meet men) to the downright insane (land yourself a role on a soap opera and make yourself famous and he'll regret that he ever walked out of your life).

And if all this isn't enough to convince you that you probably don't want to read this book, the entire thing is written in size 16 font. That's really big. And that gets kind of annoying after a while.

If you're looking for dating advice that is designed to help you become a better person and, in essence, meet a better man, this is not the book you want to invest in.

RATING: 1 OUT OF 5



Suggested free e-books to read:

Juggler - How To Be A Pickup Artist
Michael Lee - How To Be A Red Hot Persuasion Wizard
Peter Latourette - How To Meet Beautiful Woman

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Chris Brown Beat Rihanna Often

Chris Brown Beat Rihanna Often Cover
Well it's done. CHRIS BROWN has been sentenced to 5 years of probation and 6 months community labor (that means he has to pick up garbage in the streets and stuff) for beating up RIHANNA. He must also attend 1 year of domestic violence counseling.

None of this is shocking news - we all knew he wasn't going to do time, especially considering RIHANNA did not want to press any charges.

What also isn't surprising is that CHRIS BROWN was involved in violent incidents before this episode that got him arrested. Apparently, Rihanna slapped him once and he shoved her into a wall in Europe. I'm curious: Is what she did a "violent incident" as well?

The second time, CHRIS BROWN and RIHANNA were vacationing in Barbados when they began arguing in a Range Rover. CHRIS BROWN got out of the car and smashed in 2 windows.

And these are just the incidents we know about now. It's obvious that CHRIS BROWN has some anger issues. I mean, he came from a home of domestic abuse, so it's not surprising that he is the way he is.

I'm sure RIHANNA wasn't a mousy little thing in all of this, but did CHRIS BROWN get off too easy?

Suggested free e-books to read:

Juggler - How To Meet And Connect With Women
Fj Shark - How To Be The Jerk Women Love
Dylan Morgan - Hypnosis For Beginners

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Woman Has Twins From Two Different Fathers

Woman Has Twins From Two Different Fathers Cover
In Turkey, a DNA paternity test performed at the request of a suspicious husband proved that his wife gave birth to twins born from two different men's sperm.

The 24-year-old woman, known only as CK, had sex with her husband and her lover on the same day and two of her eggs were fertilized by each of the men's sperm.

According to doctors, this phenomenon (known as heteropaternal superfecundation) is so rare that there are only a handful of cases of this occurrence around the world.

And I'm guessing that there are only a handful of women who have sex with their husbands and lovers on the same day as well. So there.

Soon after she gave birth to the twins, CK noticed that one of them resembled her lover and panicked. Meanwhile, neighbors told her husband that she was being unfaithful, which prompted the DNA test.

When the results returned, her husband kept his biological child and threw his wife and the other child out. Her own father also disowned her so she sought refuge in a woman's shelter, but her child was taken into custody by the state.

Suggested free e-books to read:

Mffff - Living As The Center Of Attention
Friday Nancy - Women On Top How Real Life Has Changed Women Fantasies
Sylvester Onyemalechi - 16 Common Mistakes Single Men Make

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Dating Human Interest

Dating Human Interest Image
Each and every day, more and more people are grabbing on to the concept of online dating. This does not seem crazy when you think about how popular and widely used the Internet has become. From shopping to socializing to researching, the Internet has proven itself nearly endless in its possibilities. What can you do to stand out from the crowd and get great results from online dating?

* BE HONEST


One of the best things you can do to find success with online dating involves being honest. If you are not a millionaire than owns a series of companies around the country, you should not pretend otherwise. Do not post a picture in your profile that is not you, no matter how self-conscious you are about your looks. Your potential love interest will assume that any and all information you post on the dating site is true; when they find out that you were lying, you will pay the price for it.

* DO NOT RUSH


You would not ask somebody to rush through a delicate surgical procedure, would you? The same approach should be used for dating. Do not rush things, no matter how anxious you are to take things to the next level. Do not plan a romantic holiday the day after you first meet in person. Do not expect them to give out personal information, such as their phone number or address, when you have only known each other a few hours. The key is to move at a pace that is comfortable for the both of you. Savour each moment, and the benefits will come.

* BE CAUTIOUS


There is nothing wrong with looking for the best in people, but no matter how nice they might seem online, offline could be a different story. You do not want potentially dangerous or troublesome people to have your personal information. A person that says they are middle-aged but are actually in their teens could cause problems, for example. Wait a few months after you have started conversing with the other person before you start giving out anything delicate. It can depend on your level of comfort, but hastiness will do you no favours.

* MEET AT A PUBLIC PLACE

When meeting for the first time, people can feel nervous and even scared. In order for everybody to feel comfortable and secure, you should choose a public place to hold your meeting. Parks within reasonable distance of your respective homes, a cinema establishment and so on are good choices. Asking loved ones such as family members to act as chaperones or companions can also break up the tension. The important thing is to have fun and be natural. When you do this, you will get the results that you want.

Suggested free e-books to read:

Tyler Durden - Dissecting Shit Tests
Michael Webb - Dating Exercises
Dr Joy Browne - Dating For Dummies


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Two Hours Romance Add Romance In Your Busy And Hectic Life

Two Hours Romance Add Romance In Your Busy And Hectic Life Image
Nowadays, we do not have enough time to spend with others. This is all because of heavy work pressure. We didn't get even some hours to spend with our loved ones just because of busy and hectic scheduled. But by following these amazing tips you can make your day beautiful with your partner. This will also help you to make your personal relation stronger. With only a little bit of effort and wish, you can give an extreme pleasure to your love life.

Well, if you can spare at least 2 small hours a week, you can easily give time to your personal relationship. It's really true. Check out these tips to learn how. Firstly, try to do the dinner or a lunch with each other. If you are so busy and don't get time in office, simply go out for a lunch or a dinner together. On the other side, if you can't go outside, just make something special in home itself. By remembering your beautiful moments that you have spend together, you can make your candle light dinner in home as well.

Another option through which you can easily add romance in your busy life is that before going on a bed just kiss each other on forehead that will make you feel close to each other. Moreover, you can also go for shopping weekends that will also make you feel extremely good. May be you are in any corner of the world; always try to talk one another through phone if it is not possible for you to meet everyday. So, in this way you can make your simple and boring life too romantic.

Suggested free e-books to read:

Tyler Durden - Alpha Behaviours Heirarchies States And Wingtactics
William Robinson - Woman Her Sex And Love Life

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